Mirror
by yami-tenshin
Summary: After Kyoto everything seems to be breaking down for Tsuzuki and Hisoka but sometimes things need to break down to fall into place. TsuxHis, Tatari
1. Chapter 1

**This would be my first YnM fanfic . It was suppose to be a short one-shot but it went out of control -- Hope you enjoy and Please Review!  
Discalimer: I do not own or recieve any profits from YnM **

"BAKA!"

Tatsumi sighed and paused with one hand on the doorknob to Tsuzuki's and Kurosaki's office. Five months had passed since the Kyoto incident and thing had gone back to normal... for the most part at least.

Straitening up he fixed his glasses and pushed the door open only to duck from a flying book. Giving a mental sigh this time Tatsumi began to think of what level of 'scary Tatsumi' he would have to rise to, to disperse this familiar scene.

Tsuzuki was currently cowering behind his desk with a livid Hisoka threatening him with a very heavy book. A box of half eaten donuts was on Hisoka's desk and he could spy some of the white powder clinging to Kurosaki's lips. Obviously the blond teen was not too grateful for his elder partners interest in his diet.

"I swear Tsuzuki if you …"he trailed off when he felt a cold breeze down his spine. Turning their heads slowly both shinigamis gulped and shot quick pleading glances at each other when they spotted the secretary with his shadows shifting restlessly like hounds scenting game.

Hisoka slowly put the book down on his desk and tried to gather what little dignity he could "Is there anything we can help you with Tatsumi-san?" Hisoka thanked who ever was listening that his voice didn't break. Tsuzuki feeling the threat of being bludgeoned by immensely, and dreadfully boring, books pass jumped to his feet and bounded over to stand besides his partner. A trait Tatsumi had noticed developed after they had been released from the infirmary.

"As a matter of fact, Kurosaki-kun, a case has cropped up and the Chief and I thought it might interest you." Tatsumi felt a twinge of remorse when he saw the flash of apprehension in his ex-partners eyes and Kurosaki retreating deeper into his shields. "That is of course if the two of you consent to this."

Tatsumi mentally cursed when he saw the couples eyes widen at the out clause he had indivertibly given them. '_Damn! I am getting to soft. I'll have to dock someone's_ _paycheck soon.'_ Tatsumi was so immersed in his calculations he did not feel the crackling energy of a certain blond.

"Bon! Tsuzuki!" cried Watari as a greeting while pushing past a startled Tatsumi. Spotting the books on the floor and donuts in the desk he grinned and walked over and plucked a powdered donut up and bit into it. All the while, his eyes twinkled with genuine merriment. "I take it Hisoka only had tea for breakfast again?'" he asked Tsuzuki

Hisoka glared at Watari who held his hands up in surrender. Laughing the scientist grabbed hold of Tatsumi's sleeve and started tugging him out of the office. "We'll meet you in the conference room. Bon, go easy on the man will you?" he winked over his shoulder and let out a twinkling laugh as he saw the young man blush.

Tatsumi walked quietly next to his partner waiting for the explanation he knew was to come. He did not need Kurosakis empathy to know Watari had not burst in there out of the blue. Funny how he knew Wataris actions and moods when he could never figure out how to help his former partner. _'Watari'_ he glanced at the now serious man from the corner of his eye _'is different. With him…'_

Thankfully his thoughts where interrupted "They need to do this Tatsumi-san" Watari said quietly but seriously. They where standing outside of the conference room. Watari pressed his back against the door his hair curtaining his face. "I know you want to protect them, we all do, but." Watari looked Tatsumi straight in the eyes "They need to move forward. Keeping them here will only make it harder for them to function again. They have been shattered too many times before but now…now they have each other to reflect off." He finished quietly.

Watari opened the door and stepped in, not waiting for Tatsumis response. Wataris heart hurt, mainly because he felt he was being callous towards his friends. He knew what he said was right but that did not mean it didn't hurt him. Things had been shaky at best since five months ago. There had been those awkward moments where no one knew exactly where they stood.

After Tzusuki had seemed to gain his footing again things had begun to relax, but those close to him, mainly Watari and Tatsumi, had noticed the dependency of the two hurting shinigamis. It was not a bad thing, quite the opposite, but these changes where subtle nearly microscopic and Watari could see it had become a double edge sword for them.

As he had mentioned they had each other now and they drew strength from that but if, Enma forbid, something should happen to one of them? And if that wasn't enough he could see there was struggle within them to reach out. They where both trying to figure out how much they had changed and even how, something that was not easy to begin with but toss in an abused empath who is afraid of emotions, a severely depressed and powerful man with untold power within his tortured soul, and a psychotic doctor after them both and what do you get? Their life as a shinigami. _'And living people complained_ _about their lives' _snorted Watari.

Watari scurried over to his chair and plastered a smile on his face waving cheerily at the group that was walking in.

Tatsumi came in first with his usual no-nonsense air about him. Next came Hisoka with a calm expression that was totally ruined by the blush on his face. Watari chuckled a bit at this, wondering what the overenthusiastic Tzusuki had done, whom by the way had entered close on Hisokas heels sprouting a rather large bump on his head but was happily munching on his donuts.

When everyone was seated Tatsumi began, wanting to get this over with as soon as possible. " This is a highly unusual case even for us," began Tatsumi wanting to ensnare the occupants attention. Seeing his goal accomplished he proceeded all the while being careful to strengthen his already nearly impenetrable shields. He did not want the boy to feel his uneasiness.

"A young girls candle went out a week and a half ago but her soul never passed." This was nothing new, it was after all the reason this department existed. "However we have little to no information on her." That caught the attention of the people in the room.

Tatsumi continued "Her name is Yoru and is of gypsy descent. She was sixteen and possessed unusual powers. There have been no previous records of her on Earth , no schools records, birth records, nothing. Six months ago she had been admitted to a hospital to be treated for cancer."

Tatsumi was aware of the tense silence but forged onward, Wataris declaration still echoing in his mind. "There were strange marks on her back where it looked as if something had erupted from within. The records show that she died but the body went missing and her soul never made it to Meifu."

Tatsumi spread a few pictures of the victim so they could all see a visual. His three companions leaned closer to get a better view. She was quite beautiful despite her circumstances. She was a slip of a girl, probably as tall or a little smaller than Hisoka, they weren't too sure since she was lying on a hospital bed. She had long black hair and eyes that did not belong to someone so young. They where eyes that had seen too much and they believed there was nothing left.

Her skin was sickly but under it there used to be a healthy tan. Her bottom lip was full and she had long eyelashes. She would have been a remarkable beauty had she lived longer and her disease had not marred her.

Tatsumi quietly watched his companions being previously exposed to all this. Watari was particularly engrossed by the picture he held. Kurosaki was visibly shaken seeing so much similarity between the girls death and his own. As for Tzusuki… he had carefully bottled up any emotion he had behind an impassive face. Tatsumi knew this was not good but there was nothing he could do about it. He cursed himself, wondering what the hell had possessed him to suggest this particular case.

"This looks like…" Watari muttered softly placing the picture down his tone worried. Almost mechanically the duo turned to look at the picture. Tzusuki gasped and shuddered moving closer to Hisoka but not really touching him. Hisoka became paler if that was possible. It was a picture of the girl on her stomach with her back bared and the identical scars beside her shoulder blades. They looked like the ones Tzusuki had gained when the wings of the demon had sprouted out.

After a few moments of silence Tatsumi spoke once again. "There have been reports of people missing only to be found devoided of memories. They recall nothing of what had happened since they had gone missing. Some have been found dead with no apparent cause. The only thing that links them together is that all living victims claim to remember darkness engulfing them before a beautiful girl with unreal blue eyes and long black hair approached them. Yoru was the first patient to be admitted with no recollection of what happened except her story is different. All she rembers is a man coming after her. " He paused "What is so unusual is that it wasn't until after Yoru went missing that people came back with the decription of said girl. All the other victims where the ones found dead."

Silence continued to rein the office. Finally Tatsumi had to break the silence "I understand this would be a difficult case and if you feel like you can not see it trough it would be better for everyone if you would please inform me. Any mistake or hesitation in your part will put souls in danger."

'_There'_ thought Tasumi '_it's an out clause but one I can justify with out sounding_ _concerned about the two.'_ He caught the look Watari sent him, the one that said his motives where quite clear to his partner.

He was brought back when Hisoka stood up "Tatsumi-san, may we have a few minutes before we can give you an answer?" he requested in a soft voice. When he received an abrupt nod he led an unusually somber Tzusuki out of the conference room.

After the door shut he sat down and rubbed his head where he felt the beginning of a headache building. He was so concentrated in his inner turmoil the only reason he did not jump out of his seat when he felt a soft hand on his shoulder was the complete control over his reactions. Something in his mind was trying to tell him the real reason why he had allowed something other than professionalism creep trough but Tatsumi ruthlessly quelled that annoying, and frightening (despite the fact that he would deny it point blank) voice.

Looking up he saw golden eyes brimming with concern for him as well as the friends that had just walked out. Regaining his composer he inquired softly "Is there something specific I can help you with Watari-san?" Tatsumi saw a mirage of emotions flash in his partners' eyes before they settled on determination and worry. "You never let go do you, Tatsumi?" before he could answer Watari continued changing the subject and leaving Tatsumi confused and slightly disturbed.

"This is a hell of a case, isn't it?" he gestured towards the pictures and information scattered across the table.

"Yes it is. I knew there where some resemblance but I did not believe it would have affected them this much." Tatsumi replied. Watari knew that was as close as Tatsumi could get to expressing his lament and apologizing. The scientist was sure his co-workers would not hold it against Tatsumi, after all there was no malice behind his actions. He was simply trying to help them out the only way he could.

"So do you think they will take the case? And if they don't who will?" Tatsumi looked at his partner hearing no condemnation simple curiosity with an underlining of concern. Trust Watari not to judge and quietly accept. He answered honestly "I don't know but this will prove just how far they have progressed." When he saw the inquiry in the scientist eyes he elaborated at the same time wondering when his tongue had become so loose.

"We don't really know how deeply the Kyoto ordeal impacted them, nor how long they had been feeling these negative emotions." Pausing slightly he seemed to be talking more to himself than his partner "As a matter of fact we don't even know what they have or had been feeling. They are closed and private people despite their outward appearance." Watari was caught in the intensity of Tatsumis blue eyes when he abruptly looked up "Like you Watari-san. Always happy but how much of it is actually genuine?" It was Wataris turn to be left speechless.

He had never thought anybody beyond Bon had seen that. Wataris eyes narrowed slightly. Exactly how much did Tatsumi know?

They stared at each other trying to find answer neither had ever voiced out loud. Watari broke first and looked back at the pictures of the victim. He had not been prepared for Tatsumi's insight of his soul. Tatsumi had seen the slight panic and fear in Wataris eyes and allowed the subject to drop, at least until a later date, he promised himself.

"If they do accept this case it will indicate they are ready or at least attempting to get a fighting chance to continue with their afterlife." He went on as if nothing had interrupted him. "If they refuse…" he shrugged "well honestly who could blame them?" Watari merely stared at Tatsumi his face blank, and then slowly he smiled a beautiful smile that left Tatsumi a little taken back. He was not ready for the hand that gently caressed his check softly nor for the softly spoken words "You really are a caring man Tatsumi."

Tatsumi hesitantly brought his hand up to press it against the hand that was so tenderly cupping his cheek his mind blank except for the quiet comfort and pleasure he was experiencing. His rationality had been chased away with the warmth and now he could only stare as golden eyes came closer to him and he could feel warm breath on his face. The magical moment was shattered when they heard the doorknob turning.

Springing apart they blushed furiously and attempted to regain their composure. Watari hastily picked up a picture not noticing it was backward as Tatsumi began to frantically gather up papers trying to re enforce his mental shields lest Hisoka caught an errand thought or any of his swirling emotions.

All thoughts of embarrassment fled from the two men when they saw their friends entering. They where quite surprised when it was Tzusuki who spoke "We accept the case." Hisoka reached out for the files that Tatsumi automatically handed over.

"Well pack up and I will give you the hotel and your budget in an hour." came Tatsumis reply. Nodding the pair turned in unison and walked back out. Tatsumi looked to Watari and saw what he felt reflected off his eyes, worry, pride and determination to help. There was nothing left to say.

-o.0.o-

Hisoka methodically arranged the bag he would be taking to Earth making sure he packed an extra empty bag as an afterthought. For some bizarre reason Tsuzuki always ended up with more things than he had begun with. Finished packing he went to the living room and sat down on his sofa to wait for Tsuzuki before returning to JuuOhCho..

Hisoka took the moment he had of privacy to tiredly close his eyes and lean back against the sofa hugging a pillow to his chest as a lonely child would a stuffed animal. Everything was so confusing, even with out others peoples emotions. He smiled lightly when he remembered how his small unfurnished apartment became one of his havens, at least for the most part.

It had been a Saturday morning when Tsuzuki had decided to drop by to see if Hisoka would like to go eat breakfast.

He had found the boy curled up on the edge of his sofa with dark circles under his eyes and a temper to rival Terazumas'. He had ranted about the rampant emotions people projected all night long. Tsuzuki had been confused until Hisoka had clutched his head and groaned after hearing a knock on his door, not wanting to leave Hisoka but after being waved away he opened the door to find a drunk young woman. She stumbled into the apartment and started screeching about where the party had gone.

Tsuzuki had stood with his mouth hanging to his knees when a furious Hisoka had appeared and kicked the woman out and suggested that if she did not find the apartment on the second floor down herself he would be more than happy to show her the way with a slight push, before he slammed the door closed and stumbled back into the living room moaning about parties, feelings, alcohol and how he wished they would die…again.

Tsuzuki disappeared with out a word and Hisoka could not help but feel a tinge of regret and hurt. He dragged the blanket over his weary and aching body and attempted to get some sleep. He was not sure when his body took its toll and shut down. When he woke up he looked out the window and realized it was nearing nightfall again.

Confused he looked around the room wondering how he could have slept so deeply and so long without any nightmares or emotions badgering him. Blinking he tried to orient himself and discovered he was feeling quite pleased and safe even comfortable and happy. Abruptly he realized these where most definitely _not_ his emotions.

With that realization came the delicious aromas wafting through his small apartment and the slow blues coming out of his stereo. Standing on shaky legs he made his way to his kitchen/dinning room all the while wondering why he was not freaking out. Hisoka came to a dead stop when he came into his kitchen clutching the wall to support him. Not because of some ones emotions overwhelming him but his own swirling around him with intensity.

Tsuzuki was fast asleep on his table his head resting on his arms with Chinese food on the counter behind him. His kitchen was impeccably clean the opposite of how he had left it the night before. He must have made a noise because Tsuzuki snapped upright and his eyes narrowed, clearing immediately when he spotted Hisoka.

"Hisoka you are awake? How did you sleep? Are the wards working? Do you feel hungry? How are you feeling? You don't look to good."

Hisokas head began to spin with the rapid questions and even faster emotions pouring out of his exuberant partner. Tsuzuki immediately pulled his shields around him and guided his smaller partner to a chair and sat him down.

Hisoka was startled when he saw a glass of water being placed in front of him. Looking up he saw concerned amethyst eyes. He shook his head and murmured a soft thank you before picking up the glass of water and taking a drink from the blessedly cold glass. Tsuzuki nodding turned around and began filling plates up with food and humming softly leaving Hisoka to sort out trough the events that had happened.

When Tsuzuki placed a plate full of food in front of him and then sat himself down Hisoka began to ask questions. "What are you doing here?" Tsuzuki giggled "Why eating, silly"

Hisoka rolled his eyes and took a bite out of the sinfully delicious food when his stomach decided to protest its lack of nutrition. Suddenly his mind clamped on something he had heard among Tsuzuki's babbling "What did you mean by wards?" he asked warily.

Tsuzuki brightened up. "Oh that! Well I got an idea while you where cursing everything and everybody around you." Hisoka tried to keep irritating blush out of his face but by the look on Tsuzuki's face knew he failed miserably and just glared muttering "Baka" before resuming his meal.

Tsuzuki continued as if he had not heard the comment "I went to ask Wakaba to help me with some charms and I warded your house. You know how I can expel things or contain? Well I figured I could somehow repel emotions from entering your apartment that way you won't have to deal with all the emotions outside.I'm not sure how long tey will last or how effective but you can tell me what the problems are and we can work from there ne?"

Tsuzuki looked so pleased with himself but the smile slowly faded as he saw Hisokas face.

Hisokas chopsticks had fallen from his nerveless fingers and he was staring at Tsuzuki as if he had never seen him before. "You're….not happy?" asked a deflated Tsuzuki and Hisoka could feel his disappointment and regret.

Hisoka finally found his voice and asked in a small shaky voice never taking his wide eyes from his partners form "You…did all this…for me?" When he received a nod he lowered his head and whispered in a tone that nearly broke the brunets heart "Why?"

Hisoka was startled when he felt a warm hand rest on top his head "Because you deserve it. And because I care for you." He replied in soft tone.

That had been a week before Kyoto. Hisoka had not sorted out his feelings or what he was going to do about them, but now he wondered if there was anything he could do. Tsuzuki had stayed but he had also become unusually quiet and the mask of cheeriness had been on more often than not.

Sighing he wondered if it had been a good idea to accept the case, with Tsuzuki so unstable, he just did not know.

Suddenly Tsuzuki appeared with a suitcase in hand and his mask in place. "Ready Hisoka?" he asked with nauseating cheeriness.

Hisoka grit his teeth and bit out "Will you stop already! Just stop" Tsuzuki's façade slipped to one of confusion. Hisoka stood up and reached for Tsuzuki's hand "You can't hide it from me and what's more I don't know why you do."

Tsuzuki pulled his hand out of Hisokas grasp but relented when he saw a flash of hurt in his usually stoic partners face "I don't want to burden you Hisoka."

Hisoka hissed "Baka. If you where a burden do you think I would have stopped you from leaving m… us?"

Tsuzuki was surprised. This was the first time Hisoka had mentioned what had happened with Touda. "I'm sorry Hisoka but…it's not like you are honest with me either. Besides I'm not an empath so I don't know what you feel."

Hisoka narrowed his eyes but acknowledged the truth. Sighing he picked up his bag and faced his partner again. Suddenly he got an idea, "Tsuzuki why did you do this for me?" When he said _this_ they both knew he was talking about the wards.

"Because I wanted you to feel safe." came the immediate response.

"So why won't you let me protect you? Is it because you think I am a child or weak?" Hisoka inquired softly. Tsuzuki was startled, he had never thought of it that way before.

Then he smiled a genuine smile "I guess we have a lot to learn don't we 'Soka?" Hisoka stared and felt a flutter in the pit of his stomach. He wanted to see more of those smiles.

He snorted at the corniness of his thought s and muttered "I guess we do." before they shimmered out.

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	2. Chapter 2

"Well, Tatsumi is as cheap as ever I see." stated Tsuzuki as soon as he opened the door to their room.

Hisoka was still blushing whether from embarrassment or anger Tsusuki was not sure. "I can't believe it!" his blond partner ranted "Every freakin time! And Tatsumi doesn't help by being so damn stingy"

Tzusuki just sighed and opened his suitcase and began putting his clothes on the bottom drawer of the lonely dresser in the room leaving the top one for Hisoka, knowing from previous times the youth preferred the top drawer.

Hisoka had heard the clerks rather loud thoughts when Tsuzuki had gotten the keys. Tsuzuki didn't know why it bothered Hisoka so much that people thought they were lovers.

Ok well they where both men but it wasn't _that _rare. So he was much older than him but, oh…maybe that's why. It really did not help that Tasumi had only been able to book a single bed room.

"Look Hisoka, I'll call and ask for a cot or just sleep on the ground. You can have the bed."

Hisoka stopped mid rant to stare at him. He reddened more "No, its ok. Sorry I was just being bitchy. I didn't sleep well last night." They both knew Hisoka hardly ever slept and those nights that he did where hardly what one would call peaceful. "Listen it's late so why don't we try to get some sleep before we start out tomorrow?" offered Hisoka.

"I'd like that but I'm not too sleepy so why don't you go ahead and I'll look over the files one more time."

Hisoka nodded and went to the bathroom. Soon they settled into their normal patter.

While one was in the bathroom the other began arranging the cloths or anything else they had brought in order. As Hisoka came out with his flannel pajamas on he motioned for Tsuzuki to go change. While Tsuzuki was getting ready for bed, Hisoka turned down the bed and picked up the files placing them in the middle of the bed, not as a barrier but for easy reach for both of them. That done he went to fill a pitcher of water outside and returned to find Tsuzuki already in bed.

Climbing in he handed half the files to Tsuzuki while he grabbed a notebook and a pen.

"So far we know her name is Yoru and of Gypsy descent. Have you heard of any gypsy around this district?" asked Hisoka. Tsuzuki thought for a moment and shook his head "I guess we can start there." Hisoka nodded and began scribbling notes, both shinigami thinking out loud.

This was also a rhythm they had developed. Tsuzuki would read the information out loud and they would discuss what they thought it meant, how it was important and what they would do.

Meanwhile Hisoka would write it down in neat precise handwriting. It was clear after a particular case that Tsuzuki should never be in chargeof the notes seeing as even _he_ couldn't decipher his chicken scratch. Both wondered how Tatsumi understood it or if he even tried.

"Did Tatsumi-san mention what this gift of her was?" Hisoka suddenly asked after yawning lightly in a way that made Tsuzuki want to cuddle him. The glare he received was an indication that the blond had heard that thought.

Tsuzuki merely grinned and stuck his tongue out. Thinking on the question he shook his head. Tsuzuki could see Hisoka was really tired but was afraid to go to sleep, to the realm of darkness and pain as he had come to associate the thing that should have granted him peace.

"We should continue this later." He said before faking a yawn "I'm kinda tired now." Tsuzuki saw a flash of panic in his partners green eyes before he hid it. "Alright but lets just write that last part down so we don't forget."

Tsuzuki nodded and shuffled trough the papers looking for the information. Hisoka tried to stay calm; he knew he could not try to go to sleep. If nightmares came, as he was sure they would, Tsuzuki would know and that would not only embarrass him but give Tsuzuki another reason to worry if not twist it until it somehow became his fault.

That was just how Tsuzuki was. It hurt Tsuzuki to see anyone in pain or discomfort and he blamed himself if there was nothing he could do to help. He was brought back from his musing when he heard his partner call out his name in a strangled voice. Turning his head he got a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach at the expression on his partners face.

"Tsuzuki what's the matter?" Tsuzuki raised his head and looked at Hisoka while whispering "She was an empath Hisoka."

Hisoka blinked once slowly his voice croaked when he whispered "An empath? She…was an empath?" Tsuzuki slowly nodded his head trying to gauge his partners thoughts and emotions.

He became alarmed when Hisoka began to tremble, reaching out a hand slowly as if not to startle the boy he laid a hand gently on his smooth cool cheek. The only thoughts whirling in the teens head where '_There are others like me? How did she cope? Why was she killed, like me?" _ He heard a faint buzzing sound and he tried t concentrate on it feeling the urgency and anxiety behind the words he could not hear.

"Hisoka? Hisoka come back to me now, please." cried Tsuzuki while shaking the boy lightly. He sighed in relief when he saw green eyes clear and look quizzically at him.

"Gods, you scared me!" he muttered before he touched his brow to Hisokas slightly clammy one. Hisoka could feel the worry and relief coursing trough his older partner. He tried to calm himself and his partner down by placing a hesitant hand on the broad shoulder in front of him "I'm fine. It just…took me by surprise is all." Realizing the position they where in Hisoka blushed and reflexes kicked in.

"Baka! Get off me!" he growled while pushing Tsuzuki back but not harshly. Tsuzuki just laughed and said "You are so mean 'Soka."

Hisoka just scowled and picked up his pen and notebook writing down the new piece of information with shaky hands. He closed the notebook and carefully placed it on the dresser next to the lamp. Tsuzuki had gathered the scattered papers and placed them on the floor on his side of the bed.

There was an awkward silence when neither knew exactly what to do. Tsuzuki finally took the initiative snuggling down and waiting for Hisoka to lie down. Hisoka slowly turned the light of and stiffly laid down. Minutes passes where both shinigamis laid tensely on their backs each immersed in their own thoughts. Suddenly the silence was broken by Tsuzuki's timid questions.

"Ne Hisoka, we can do this right? I mean, we…I.." he fumbled into silence as he awaited his partners response.

Hisoka never being one to lie told him quite bluntly "I don't know Tsuzuki, but I am willing to try." He could feel Tsuzuki's relief. He didn't like when people lied to him. He knew they weren't doing it to be mean, quite the opposite it was because they where trying to shield him but, that just made him feel like a child. And not a very bright one at that.

He had tried not to let it get to him but after Kyoto, it just depressed him. Everyone was going out of their way to make him happy, to shield him from all the bad but in reality all it did was irritate him and lower what little, if any, self-esteem he had.

Well not everybody did that he conceded. Terazuma was more than happy to rub his face in whatever was handy and surprisingly Tsuzuki appreciated that more than he did the sugar coating his well meaning co-workers tried. Of course he would vehemently deny it if anyone ever found out.

Hisoka was the other person who never lied to him. Well sure he denied some thing and sometime opted to flat out refuse to answer but Tsuzuki preferred it that way. The things he denied where often trivial and he could see the truth anyways.

Tsuzuki thought it was because everyone treated him like a kid, so he was determined not treat anyone like that. Oh, oh dear. Tsuzuki had treated Hisoka like a child, always trying to shield him. Maybe this was part of what Hisoka meant back at his apartment.

Hisoka could feel a trickle of guilt through Tsuzuki's impressive walls and he began to worry. Lightly, in order not to alert his partner, Hisoka reached out his empathy to see what had disturbed his partner. Normally he would have left Tsuzuki alone but these where not normal times and he was not referring to Kyoto specifically. He read what his partner was fretting about and allowed a small smile to creep into his face.

So his partner finally understood. Good, maybe now he would start treating him more as an equal. Not that Tsuzuki had neglected or belittled him but there where times when he took actions in order to protect his "younger partner". Hisoka snorted, yeah small; after all he was stuck in an eternally sixteen year old body where his hormones would be out of whack and in control for most of the time. Great. _'But_' he thought regretfully _'the way I look is the only thing about me that has ever remotely resembled childhood.'_

Shaking off the unpleasant thoughts he muttered "Baka" and lightly tapped his knuckles to Tsuzuki's forehead. "Stop thinking so loud and start talking!" he demanded.

"Heh. Sorry Hisoka. I was just wondering how we are going to fare tomorrow. And what we are going to have for breakfast" he chirped at the end. Hisoka rolled his eyes and snorted "Always thinking with your stomach, you bottomless pit." Tsuzuki simply nodded his head empathetically not taking offense since he knew Hisoka was just teasing him.

After another few minutes of silence Tsuzuki's voice came out from the darkness again "Hisoka?" the teen made a questioning sound "How do you think her empathy will affect you if we do meet up with Yoru."

Hisoka was silent for a few minutes "You know I don't really know. I've never thought about it, maybe we'll just.., I don't know rebound of each other or something. Now go to sleep I know you are tired. We will continue this in the morning."

Hisoka was right, they where both tired. The emotions and event of the day had caught up with them leaving them both mentally and physically tired. Hisokas last thoughts where a prayer that the numbness that was currently overcoming him would last the night.

Tsuzuki watched his partner give in to the exhaustion and wondered briefly if he should stay awake and guard the young one. Shaking his head he closed his eyes, Hisoka would not appreciate it and besides he needed to recover his strength and rest his weary mind if he wanted to function properly tomorrow. _'Don't worry 'Soka I'll look after you tonight'_ where his last thoughts.

Hours later Tsuzuki was jerked awake from his sleep when he heard pathetic whimpering. Looking down he saw Hisoka curled up in a little ball whimpering softly in a manner that made Tsuzuki want to cry. He was deciding whether to wake him up or not when Hisoka began to choke out a few words

"Why won't you leave me alone?! Please just stop!" Tsuzuki grit his teeth and reached for the shaking shoulders "Leave me alone!" Hisoka cried out when he felt hands holding his shoulders he began to panic trashing around "No, no! I don't care! I know you hate me but please! Leave him alone! Tsuzuki!"

Tsuzuki was startled when he heard his name from the rosy lips and he thought Hisoka had woken up but soon realized he was still in the clutches of his nightmare.

"Tsuzuki please, Help me! Don't leave me!" Tsuzuki couldn't take it anymore he pulled Hisoka onto his lap and slowly began to rock the boy whispering to him over and over again "I'm here Hisoka, I'm not going anywhere. You are safe here with me." He began to rub his back and run a hand trough the silky blond hair making sure to let only comforting and warm feeling thru his walls. Hisokas sobs began to lessen until his breathing evened out and he relaxed , his breath hitching every now and then like when a child cried himself to sleep.

How many nights had he dreamed like that? Woken up cold, alone and afraid? Tsuzuki wondered. _'This will stop! It has to!'_ Tsuzuki shifted and was surprised when small hand clutched his sleep shirt tighter and a soft cry reached his ears. "Don't leave please"

Tsuzuki kissed Hisoka's damp brow and snuggled down with him clutched to his chest "I'll always be here for you Hisoka" As if he heard Hisoka once again relaxed and burrowed in into the warmth Tsuzuki's body and emotions emanated.

'_Never again_" vowed Tsuzuki _'Never will you wake up alone again.'_ Tightening his arms around his precious bundle Tsuzuki began to plot ways to fulfill his promise because he was going to do it one way or the other.

-o.0.o-

Hisoka snuggled into the warm comfortable pillow lingering in the pleasant dream where Tsuzuki was holding him and keeping him safe. Hisoka was arguing with himself trying to prolong this wonderful feeling when he felt his pillow sigh into his hair. _'Wait a minute. Since when do pillows have a heartbeat and arms'_ Hisokas sleep fuzzy mind tried to come up with an answer when his eyes popped open and he realized his answer.

Since said pillow became Tsuzuki.

Hisokas eyes widened to an impossible size and he gaped at the position he was in. He was half lying atop Tsuzuki his leg tangled with Tsuzuki's much longer ones. One of his hands was buried in Tsuzuki's fascinating soft hair and another touching warm _naked_ skin under his sleeping shirt where his hand had burrowed in. While Tsuzuki himself had an arm tight around his waist and the other angled up his back his hand buried in his hair holding his head directly above his heart.

Hisoka's mind failed him at the exact moments he meet adorably sleepy amethyst eyes. Tsuzuki blinked trying to get rid of the lingering sleep. He noticed Hisoka was awake and apparently in shock. "What the Hell is going on!" screamed Hisoka in a strangled voice while attempting to sit up.

Tsuzuki frowned but let the boy go. That only made the situation worse when Hisoka realized he was now _straddling_ his gorgeous partner. '_Gorgeous?! Ohmygod! Kill me now!'_ Hisoka scrambled off flushing a bright red while he waited for an explanation.

"Uhm I was cold?"

Hisoka grit his teeth and bit out "Don't patronize me Tsuzuki!"

Said man frowned. Hisoka was right, hadn't he himself said last night he would stop doing this? Besides he was still in one piece and if you didn't count glares that put Toudas flames to shame he was virtually unharmed, a miracle in itself if he did say so himself.

"TSUZUKI!" came Hisokas angry remark but Tsuzuki could ear the undertone of fear and panic.

He settled with telling him the truth. Besides then he would know how much work he had cut out for him, not that Hisoka was a burden or anything but he also did not want the shinigami unhappy. "You had a nightmare" he said simply.

He watched Hisokas mouth open and close with no sound and waited patiently for what came next. "And how does my nightmare wind up with me…like that?" he asked. Now Tsuzuki heard the embarrassment and worry in Hisokas voice with very little actual anger.

"I tried waking you up but it wouldn't work so I did the only thing I could and well I comforted you." Now Hisoka was livid "I am not a child to be molly cuddled!" he hissed.

Tsuzuki's face and tone where serious when he spoke next "No but you where hurting. Nobody should suffer trough things like that alone Hisoka."

Hisoka was both mortified and angry so he said the only thing that came to mind "You're one to talk." He immediately regretted when he felt and saw the flash of hurt run thru Tsuzuki as he stood up and shuffled his feet towards the bathroom. "I guess I am. But no one has ever offered to comfort me to begin with and honestly I don't know if I could be comforted or even if I'd want it." came his soft reply just before he closed the door to the bathroom.

Hisoka hung his head. Everything was spiraling out of control. He _knew _ Tsuzuki didn't do anything wrong, he was just trying to help and Gods did it help. That was the first time he could remember sleeping peacefully trough out the night. Well at least after the initial nightmare. So why did he push him away? Embarrassment? He shouldn't feel it, it was Tsuzuki after all.

He slowly raised his head as a subdued Tsuzuki walked out of the bathroom. Before Hisoka could say anything Tsuzuki spoke up but did not raise his head. "I'm sorry. I know how much you dislike being touched but I thought…maybe I could help you. Make the pain go away like you do to me but I guess I can only bring pain." He finished in a whisper as a lone tear rolled down his cheek.

Hisoka was near tears now. Because of his stupid insecurities he had caused Tsuzuki pain. He did not have to see the tortured look in his partners eyes he could feel it despite the walls Tsuzuki had attempted to shore up. He saw Tsuzuki turn away from him and begin to walk away just like in his nightmares.

No, no this couldn't be happening! It was not suppose to happen! Tzusuki was suppose to stay…with him. _'But how can he when all you do is push him away?'_ asked a snide voice in his head that sounded horrifyingly similar to his fathers.

Hisoka wrapped his arms around his shaking body and tried to call out to Tsuzuki but all that came out where whimpers. Tsuzuki must have heard him.

Turning his head the taller man saw his partner on the bed rocking himself with his eyes dilated. Abandoning his hurt and disgust with himself he rushed to his partner calling out his name. He kneeled in front of the shaking boy and lifted a hand to touch the blond hair but stopped short of it, softly whispering "Hisoka?" When that got him no response he slowly lowered his hand until his hand was buried in the soft strands.

Hisoka jerked and looked up to see amethyst eyes bridle with fear and concern. Eyes that where the one constant thing in his unstable life.

The ones that kept the demons at bay but at the same time brought fear. An irrational yet indesposable fear he had yet to find the root of. But that was for another day because now Tsuzuki's eyes shone with fear and he couldn't stand to see him in pain even if it meant he would feel tightness in his chest that bordered on pain. But it was a small price to pay to make that pain leave those eyes.

With out a word Hisoka reached out and clung tightly to Tsuzuki's neck ignoring the surprise that flared along with the urge to pull away and he was not sure where Tsuzuki's feelings began and his ended. It was not that he was synchronizing but they where feeling the same for different reasons.

While both where surprised at the fact that Hisoka had willingly thrown himself into his partners arms Tsuzuki wanted to back away for fear of hurting Hisoka or having him read something that was better left in the dark recess of his mind. Hisoka was scared of physical contact.

There where very few times in his life that human contact did not equal pain and the only reason he had the courage to do so now was because it was _with _Tsuzuki that he did not feel pain. Barring a few moments of course.

"I'm sorry" Hisoka whispered "I was just…you where…I…. I'm sorry." he finished lamely. Tsuzuki gently rubbed his back feeling how degree by slow degree Hisoka began to relax into his minstrations .

"Where you afraid of me? Or just embarrassed?" Hisoka sighed and reluctantly disentangled himself from the haven of Tsuzuki's arms. Tsuzuki was being serious and not hiding behind any masks the least he could do was show his appreciation by giving him a straight answer and not hiding like a scared child. Though at the moment he felt like one.

Patting the space next to him Hisoka waited until Tsuzuki was seated next to him before answering him. "Yes, to both." Before Tsuzuki could protest Hisoka held up a hand asking for silence.

Hisoka sorted out his jumbled thought s and spoke slowly as if testing each word and their accuracy. Tsuzuki took note of the effort and realized it was not hard to be himself with out hiding behind his usual go-lucky face. It seemed like Hisoka appreciated it more, the proof being in the effort he was making in coming up with an answer and not blowing it off by yelling at him and calling him an idiot.

Tsuzuki was brought back when he heard Hisokas hesitant voice. "I'm not afraid of you abusing me physically, I know you are incapable of doing so. But my mind argues against my feelings and it makes me feel…" he groped for the right words and Tsuzuki concentrated on what his partner was saying knowing it was a rare thing indeed for Hisoka to try and explain what he felt inside. From experience he knew it was never easy and what effort it took to do so, to say he appreciated it would fall short.

'_Abusing he said? Did he mean as in sexually? But why?..Gods'_ and then it hit him. Hisoka had woken up to be held against someone against his will, never mind that it was him. _'He must have been terrified. I'm surprised he even wants to talk to me.'_ He was snapped back to reality when he felt a light slap on the back of his head accompanied by a soft "Baka"

He looked guilty over at his partner who merely rolled his eyes and stood up. He paused when he felt a large warm hand envelope his much smaller and cooler one. Looking down at their joined hands he slowly raised his eyes until vivid green meet bright amethyst. "Makes you feel what, Hisoka?"

Hisoka was surprised he had thought Tsuzuki had forgotten or at least lost interest. Hisoka shook his head "insecure which in turn makes me feel angry." There was a thoughtful silence between them before Hisoka tried again

"It helped me but, I don't want you to feel obligated to make me feel better. It is not your duty and I don't want to be more of a burden to you." Hisoka was startled when he felt Tsuzuki grip his shoulders and spin him around.

With utter seriousness and conviction he spoke slowly "Hisoka you have never and will never be a burden. I do this because I want to not because I have to or I feel obligated to. Hisoka you are my partner, my friend and even my…" Hisokas eyes widened to an impossible size.

He was not ready to answer him, he was not ready to hear it out loud. If he said it out loud, it would somehow make it true, make it real. Amethyst eyes kept getting closer and closer '_Would it really be bad to let go? At least this once?_' he dazedly thought before allowing his eyes to drift shut.

Hisoka held his breath when he felt Tsuzuki breath softly on his parted lips. His rational side was screaming at him to get away. It would only end in pain again; it was a weakness he could not afford. But that voice was drowned out by the beating of his heart and the desperate cries from somewhere within himself. A part that soaked up the warmth that emanated from his partner.

The door banged open and Gushonshi flew in a rush squawking out their names. The two jumped away from each other blushing madly. Hisoka threw himself against the pillows and groaned. He felt guilty for wanting to strangle the demigod but at the same time wanted to hug him for interrupting them. Gods was he out of his mind?! Now Tsuzuki would probably do something extremely stupid that would embarrass him for the rest of his afterlife.

"Did…I interrupt something?" asked Gushonshi a little hesitant to know the answer.

Tsuzuki did not have to be an empath to feel the mortification rolling off Hisoka, and this time he really couldn't blame him. He was still in partial shock. He had almost confessed what he had kept a secret for a long time _and_ he had almost _kissed_ him. He wanted to join Hisoka and burry his head underneath a pillow.

It's not that he was ashamed or anything but this was something he would rather do in private with out an audience. He knew if he ever had another chance Hisoka would much prefer that way too. But it seemed they still needed more time to sort out their feelings. Or at least what to do with them. _'Argh_' he growled while running a frustrated hand thru his hair _'when did emotions become so damn complicated?!_' He really felt for his partner now.

Not only did he have to deal with his feelings but with everybody else's as well. It was a wonder he had not gone insane. Well he had known since the beginning of their partnership that there was a reason for Hisokas ten inch ice wall between himself and everyone around him. He was brought back from his little tirade when he saw a white clawed hand wave in front of him. He blinked and looked into one of the twins worried gaze.

'_Now is not the time for this' _but he promised to make time to sort his thoughts and feelings out later. Pasting on a smile he focused back to the outside world "I'm sorry Gushonshi. I had a rough night and am a little out of it" he said while laughing a little. "What where you asking?"

The flying demigod gave him a look that said he wasn't buying it but he knew better than to try and get Tsuzuki to talk about something.

"I asked if I interrupted something." Tsuzuki smiled a bit sheepishly "Well like I said I was having a bad night and it affected Hisokas empathy. He has a headache and I was checking for fever before you came in. I think he'll be fine with some breakfast and some peace and quiet."

So saying so he picked up his trench coat and ushered the protesting bird-like god out the door calling out behind his shoulder, "I'll be back with breakfast Hisoka. If you feel up to it why not sketch out a plan for today?" he suggested before he shut the door firmly behind him.

He placed a ward like the ones in Hisokas house on the door before leading the gaping Gushonshi away chatting merrily. Maybe this out would give them time to settle down, besides Tsuzuki knew they needed all the peace and strength they could gather. He had a cold feeling in his gut telling him this was going to be a difficult case, one he was not looking forward to tackling.

Hisoka had rolled onto his back as soon as he heard the door close. He stared blankly at the ceiling attempting to process what had just taken place. Ok, sure he knew Tsuzuki was an expert at leading people to believe what he wanted, not that he did it with ill will mind you. It was simply his defense mechanism, what he had yet to figure out was if it was for the sake of the other person or himself.

He let out a hiss of breath that sounded more like "shiiiiiiit". Gods their lives where like damn soap operas. High emotions here, a psycho on the other side, the only good thing was that neither could get pregnant. He paused, well that is unless Watari can somehow make one _'Gah! What the hell am I thinking? We'd have… before the issue of a baby can come up and… why the hell am I still thinking about it?'_

Hisoka thumped his head back on the pillow and groaned reaching over and snagging the pillow next to him. He tried blocking the thoughts from his head as effectively as he cut the light by placing the pillow over his head but only achieved blocking the much needed air to his lungs. _'Hmmm it smells like Tsuzuki. He always smells of sweets, like…SHIT! Why the hell am I thinking about how he freakin smells?!?!' _

Hisoka groaned again and rolled over to try and scatter his thoughts. He remembered quite clearly he had been on the edge when he flopped ungracefully onto the cold hard floor with a screech he would die denying sounded anything like a girl. Moaning softly he pushed himself into a sitting position and let his head flop onto the bed behind him. This was not going to be a good day. He knew it just as he knew Tsuzuki would come back with something that if they where still alive would have killed him of a sugar overdose if not ruin his arteries completely.

Hisoka grit his teeth and headed for the shower. He figured he could let the hot water relax part of his tense muscles while he thought of the order in which they would visit places. He stared at himself in the mirror and for once he did not see himself, or Muraki or his father. Instead he stared beyond and wondered about the other empath Yoru.

Was she as cynical and closed as himself? How did she cope with the world? Turning away he figured he was bound to find out, one way or the other.

**Hope you enjoyed and please leave a review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**MSYOU: There will definitely be more Tatari in here. I'm glad you are enjoying my fic. Your reviews encourage me to write faster.  
**

**  
Trans: Thank you blushes I'm so happy you think I kept them in character as I was aiming for that. There will definitely be more fluffy scenes (like in this chapter) for both Tatari and Tsusoka. **

**Thank you for your encouraging reviews and I hope you keep them coming.  
**

**I do not own YnM (Full disclaimer on my page)**

They where definitely _not_ having a good day.

When Tsuzuki had come back sure enough he had brought pastries but Hisoka had to give it to him, after all their time together Tsuzuki had managed to pin him down. He had brought Hisoka tea and a lemon tart while he wolfed down Enma knows what but Hisoka was sure they had half a pound of sugar each.

After breakfast they had gone to visit the place where the winged creature was said to have been spotted the most. That was what the Gushonshi had been so eager to tell. To make a bad day worse it was infernally hot outside and there was still a slight tension between himself and Tzusuki. Oh and if _that_ wasn't enough the damn bird-chicken whatever kept throwing them suspicious looks.

No doubt he would fly back to report and add his two cents on what he thought was going on. This by the way happened to be unresolved sexual tension. _'Damn bird thingy needs to learn how to shield better'_ thought Hisoka furiously. _'Plus he is hitting way to close to home for comfort. Why me?' _ he ranted to heavens. He knew it was childish and pointless but he had to admit it did make him feel a little better. Not much but some.

He was startled when a cold can was pressed to his overheated forehead. Blinking up he met twinkling eyes that crinkled at the corners. He took the cold beverage and muttered a "Baka" as an afterthought. Tsuzuki simply laughed and sat next to his partner on the bench.

Tsuzuki had begged and cried until Hisoka had finally caved in for a break after hours of hitting dead ends. Hisoka knew Tsuzuki was not as tired as he made himself look, he had done it for him.

Tsuzuki knew he was too stubborn and too prideful to ask for a break from the double taxation of walking among crowds and the over bearing sun. Tsuzuki always did little things like that for him. Like finding a secluded corner of the park under shade so they could rest. Or buying something cold, whether it be ice cream or a drink, pretending it was purely for himself when they both knew very well it was not.

It was an unspoken agreement between them, almost like a game, their own little secret from the world. Hisoka blushed at the utter childishness of that train of thought. Thankfully the blush from the heat covered his embarrassment. "Ne Hisoka, are we friends?"

Hsioka chocked on his drink, coughing he looked slightly surprised at Tsuzuki and croaked a "Wh-what?" after he managed to gulp some air in instead of liquid. Tsuzuki didn't have his goofy face, this time he was serious concentrating on the can he held and blushing slightly. "I was just wondering, I mean I consider you my friend, the best actually."

He paused slightly to gulp down some of his drink. Hisoka did not speak knowing Tsuzuki had not finished talking. "I- I haven't had a true friend." Hisoka made a disbelieving noise. Tsuzuki had tons of friends so why?

Tsuzuki gave small sad chuckle "You don't believe me? I do have friends, I mean Watari and Tatsumi and all the others they are great but…" Tsuzuki sighed and tipped his head back

Hisoka blinked a couple times as if that would help his thinking process. Well he had to admit Tatsumi-san and Watari-san where good friends. They where always there when you needed them and even when you didn't.

"They are good friends" Tsuzuki tried again "They respected my wish to end my existence" Hisoka cringed and lowered his eyes. So Tsuzuki really had wanted to die and he had selfishly forced him to stay. Hisoka was startled when felt a warm hand cover his much smaller one.

He slowly raised his eyes to Tsuzuki's and sucked in a breath. '_His eyes! They reflect so much; gratitude, pleasure, a little insecurity and…'_ Hisoka shied away from the last. He wasn't ready, not yet. "But a true friend, saw past my pain. He risked everything to bring me back safely. I think that makes him my true friend, my best friend. Don't you think Hisoka?"

Hisoka slowly turned his hand over and linked his fingers with Tsuzuki's. _'We are true friends and maybe…maybe something more' _Hisoka thought dazedly. Tsuzuki smiled a genuine smile that reached his eyes and lightened his whole figure.

Hisoka held his breath, this was also a reason why they where 'best friends' Tsuzuki hardly ever smiled like that. He knew Tatsumi had been gifted with a rare smile or two but they simply took Hisokas breath away. He felt an answering tug on his lips and allowed a tiny smile to play on his lips.

Tsuzuki was surprised and delighted when he saw the beginning of Hisoka smiles. He knew how special and extremely rare that expression ever grazed his partners face. It made him want to see more of them and at the same time not. They warmed Tsuzuki where he always felt cold but he was also selfish wanting those smiles for himself.

Neither where really thinking when they closed the space between them. Their thoughts solely on wanting that smile to last and hoping to make the other smile like that for him again. They seemed to come to their senses an inch away from each other. Both eyes widened and their breathing became jerky.

It seemed like an eternity as they stared into each other shocked gazes. Hisoka's heart threatened to explode from his chest while Tsuzuki grew lightheaded from lack of oxygen. Ever so slowly as if afraid to break the spell that had been woven around them they leaned in closer closing the gap between them.

The earth did not quite shake but their worlds certainly did. Hisokas' lips where cool and silky as they pressed timidly against Tsuzuki's warm firm ones. They stayed like that for a few seconds before Tsuzuki had the courage to gently brush his lips back and forth across his partners. Hisoka moaned softly and closed his eyes to better enjoy the sensations this mere meeting of lips caused on his system.

Hisoka was not aware that his hand had made its way to Tsuzuki's hair in a desperate attempt to hold him closer. Tsuzuki did not mind at all as he brought his own arm to circle Hisokas small waist. Seeing Hisoka was enjoying himself Tsuzuki let himself go a little further and bit his partners luscious bottom lip lightly. He was rewarded by a small gasp and trembling from his younger partner.

Thinking it was fear that had made him tremble Tsuzuki pulled back to watch the blonds reaction. Hisoka had his eyes closed; his face flushed and was breathing erratically. Slowly emerald eyes opened to meet his and Tsuzuki was relieved to see passion glazed green eyes, a little confusion and nervousness but that he could deal with.

"Tsuzuki" Hisoka whispered, he had no clue what he was supposed to do next. Before any decisions could be made for them Hisoka felt something tugging at his empathy. Pulling back he began to scan the area around him, it felt familiar yet not. It did not feel dangerous just eerily familiar.

"Hisoka?" asked a confused Tsuzuki. Hisoka had suddenly turned serious with no explanation and now he was scanning the area. Straightening up Tsuzuki reached out with his limited senses to try and find any possible danger. "What is it Hisoka?" he asked when he found nothing.

Hisoka looked into equally confused eyes "I don't know." He shook his head "It's like somebody or something is trying to get my attention. It feels familiar but, I can't pinpoint it." Tsuzuki was all business now "It's trying to get you attention? How?" Hisoka shook his head again.

"I can't quite explain it. It's kind of like tapping my empathy, like you would tap some ones shoulder to get their attention." Tsuzuki was worried now "Is it hurting you? Can you feel any danger from it?" he asked in rapid succession. "Hmmm, no." he said surprised.

"It's blocking any emotions. I- I think it wants to talk to me." He said slowly looking at his partner with a little alarm and confusion. "No!" Tsuzuki said firmly "It could be a trap." Hisoka just shook his head, he knew Tsuzuki had always been protective of him but ever since Kyoto he had doubled in his panic for his safety, almost to the point of paranoia. "It doesn't feel dangerous just…desperate. It could give us a clue on the case." He suggested.

Tsuzuki still looked dubious. He knew Hisoka was an independent person with a short temper. The only reason Hisoka hadn't hit him and called him an idiot was because he knew his protest stemmed from fear for him. Tsuzuki also knew he was being irrational and unfair. Taking a deep breath he spoke "Alright but tell me what I can do in case something happens."

Hisoka was more than a little surprised at how easily Tsuzuki gave in. He had thought he would have to loose his temper and yell at him to convince him. _'Huh, I guess this communication thing does work after all.' _ Out loud he said "Well call me back if I get lost." Tsuzuki blinked "Call you back? He parroted. Hisoka nodded "Yes just send out your emotions to me along with some thoughts and I should be able to make my way back."

Tsuzuki panicked "Should?!?!" he shrieked. Hisoka rolled his eyes and slapped Tsuzuki's forehead "Honestly baka. It's not like I've done something like this before. Now shut up before it goes away." Not waiting for Tsuzuki to answer he closed his eyes and cautiously tapped back, acknowledging it. It stopped and suddenly a light burst behind his closed eyelids and Hisoka gasped.

Tsuzuki jumped and was going to shake Hisoka when he noticed his expression. It was one of shock but no fear. Clenching his hand into tight fist he forced himself to stay still and monitor him for any signs of discomfort.

Hisoka looked around trying to orient himself. He was in a room with a single window where light poured in. "Where am I?" he whispered. Hisoka spun around when he heard a voice answer him "In your mind. I projected myself here." Hisoka strained his eyes trying to see who was talking to him. The voice came form the shadowed corner to his left. "Who are you? What do you want?"

The female voice answered with a hint of impassions "That does not matter. Listen to me! He wants you and your partner. He is setting a trap for you at the cathedral." Hisoka was more confused than ever

"Who is? Who are you? Why does he want us?" He heard a slight rustle and metal clinking "I'm who you are looking for and…" her voice changed. It was now filled with fear "He's coming back! I have to go. Be warned!" she cried out before his world spun again. "Wait!" he cried out but it was too late.

Hisokas eyes popped open scaring Tsuzuki half way to his second death. "She was scared and chained. She needs help" he said almost in a trance before slumping forward onto Tsuzuki's chest. "Hisoka? Hisoka what's wrong?" he asked in a panic. Picking the boy up he cradled him against his chest. Hisoka tipped his head back tiredly "She came to me Tsuzuki"

He was not having this; jumping to his feet he tightened his hold on Hisoka and teleported to their hotel room. Placing him gently on the bed and covering him with the blanket he pulled his cell phone and speed dialed Watari. Before Watari could chirp out a greeting Tsuzuki ordered him to come down and check on Hisoka and hung up. Sitting next to the boy he gently brushed Hisokas silky hair out of his face and was instantly transported to their first day as partners. He chuckled slightly when Hisoka muttered "Tsuzuki you idiot!"

Cracking his eyes open Hisoka reached up to cup Tsuzuki's cheek "I'm fine, baka. Just a little tired is all" while saying so he was fighting to keep his eyes open. After a few seconds his eyes drifted shut and his hand fell only to be caught by Tsuzuki's and held. Tsuzuki stayed like that until he felt something coming. He stood up protectively in front of Hisoka a fuda out and ready to be used.

He relaxed when he recognized Tatsumis shadows. As soon as the shadows receded Watari stumbled out looking around "Where's Bon?" Tsuzuki motioned to the bed and Watari practically flew onto it. Muttering as he took his pulse and what not. Tatsumi being more collected began to question Tsuzuki "What happened?"

Tsuzuki sat down at the edge of the bed picking up Hisokas hand again, a move neither of the new arrivals missed, "We where sitting in the park after we had hit dead ends when Hisoka said someone was trying to contact him." That certainly got the attention of the secretary and scientist/doctor. "What do you mean contact? Like physic?" Watari sounded both excited and worried.

"I don't know. He sort of zoned out for a while. Then he did a perfect impression of Dracula with out the fangs and started muttering about a girl."

Watari couldn't help tease his love struck friend "I think you are just jealous. Hisoka was probably dreaming about some beautiful girl he was going to throw you over for." The reaction was instantaneous; Tsuzuki started crying big crocodile tears and began whining "NO no no! Hisoka is all mines and no dumb girl is going to take him from me! Whaaaaa!"

Watari laughed and poked Tsuzuki's side while Tatsumi fixed his glasses and wondered why he had come here anyways.

The room suddenly darkened and a threatening aura surrounded the two. They looked up expecting to see a pissed off Tatsumi. What they saw shocked and terrified them, Tatsumi , the scariest most composed unafraid man they had ever meet took a step back and actually looked…worried. Slowly as if afraid to trigger some unbeknown Armageddon they turned to look behind them.

Both men stayed petrified the only change in their horror struck face was utter lack of blood in their face. Hisoka stood behind them with a look that surpassed Tatsumis 'Scary Mother ' mode. Dark flames lightened Hisokas eyes and as they looked closely they could see flames licking at Hisokas frame while a vein threatened to erupt from his forehead.

Watari and Tsuzuki hugged each other and began to whimper trying to stumble through an apology mixed with a prayer until Hisokas whiplash "Quiet" silenced them instantly. If their bodies had been working properly and not paralyzed by fear Tsuzuki was sure he would have disgraced himself by peeing his pants.

Hisoka began to talk almost in a friendly manner and that was more terrifying than him actually yelling. "What part of I am tired, did you **not** understand? I wanted some **quiet** so I could figure out what this all meant and perhaps by some miracle ease the headache I have. And what do I get?" he asked almost pleasantly.

Watari and Tsuzuki knew this was their end. Tatsumi was wise, or perhaps too scared, to interfere. He would mourn the two but he was not risking _his_ safety to save the two idiots.

"I get two **MORONS!** gossiping and pouring out more damn drama than a teenage girl! About me no less! So now you two, imbeciles are going to walk out **quietly** and buy me some food and tea. If I even detect one **hint** of sweets on you Tsuzuki I swear you are going to wish I had left you with Touda! Understood?!"

Tatsumi froze when he heard Hisoka mention Kyoto so casually. Looking over to Tsuzuki he saw a paralyzed Watari who was obviously as shocked as he. However, Tsuzuki was just blubbering away seemingly undisturbed by Kurosakis comment.

Something was changing between them and within them, perhaps Watari was right.

"Tatsumi?" Hisoka inquired. The shadow master gulped but stepped forward "H-Hai?" He saw Hisoka incline his head towards the door. Puzzled he opened the door and had to jump back in order to avoid sailing past it along with the screaming bundle.

While Tsuzuki and Watari had been blubbering their gratitude and praises Hisoka had gathered some of his power and blasted the two clean thru the open door. Tatsumi merely stared at the tangled limbs and hair that resembled his former co-workers slumped against the wall across the room.

Silently he closed the door and hoped the healing abilities that came with being a shinigami would help the poor fools. Turning back he was greeted by Hisoka who sat on the bed blinking owlishly around him. With a glare and a muttered "Light" he flopped onto his stomach and proceeded to try and catch a cat nap. Tatsumi was careful to keep any thoughts of how scary Kurosaki could be or how bitchy to himself and behind walls that put Fort Knox to shame.

Silently he turned the lights off and placed a shadow at the draped window just for good measure before he sat on the only available chair and began listing why he had accepted this job in the first place.

-.o.0.o-

Tsuzuki and Hisoka where sitting on the bed, well Hisoka was anyways. Tsuzuki said it was much more comfortable to be lying on his stomach which he proceeded to do and kick his socked feet up for good measures. Watari sat on the floor next to Tzusuki while Tatsumi sat across from them on his chosen (like there really was any choice) chair. The information on the case was spread out around them like the food had been a couple minutes ago.

Tatsumi was mildly surprised when Tsuzuki and Watari had retuned with not one sweet. Maybe he could get Kurosaki to perform that magnificent act again in order to get the department to do productive work. But then again he did not want his minions, ahem, co-workers running out the doors after hastily writing their resignation.

"Now this is just an assumption." began Hisoka "After I had time to sort things out _quietly_" He glared at the two to his right who cringed and tried to make themselves smaller. They where scarred for the whole of their after life. "Well someone tried to contact me thru my empathy. Once I allowed the contact she was able to project herself into my mind and she gave me a warning."

Hisoka could feel Tsuzuki's concern for him as well as Wataris, but with Wataris there was a spark of interest and curiosity. He mentally snorted '_Trust the geek to be fascinated by it.' _"Before you ask I don't know how to project, I never attempted to learn seeing as I had no reason to." The sad truth behind those simplistic words killed ay inquiry Watari might have had.

Tsuzuki scooted closer and rested his head against the outside of Hisokas thigh. Hisoka jumped lightly at the contact and looked down. He could see the question clearly written in his face "Is this ok?" Hisoka blushed lightly but ran a hand thru his thick hair before removing it completely. He looked up to find Watari had moved and now sat at Tatsumis feet both had an eyebrow arched at the unusual display of affection. He glared at them defiantly but it was ruined by his blush and Tsuzuki's giggle.

Bopping the older man on the head in mock anger he turned back to his friends. "As I was saying" he began again "I don't know who the person was but my bet is Yoru"

Three heads whipped up to look at him. "I can't say for sure but she said that he was after us, me and Tsuzuki, and he was setting up a trap at the cathedral." Tsuzuki pressed closer to him as he fell silent.

Tatsumi was the first to break the silence. "What makes you think it was Yoru? And who is after you?" Hisoka knew Tatsumi was not patronizing him; he simply wanted to get the facts straight. "Well we know Yoru was, is an empath and it was a female that contacted me. She was scared when she said 'he was coming'." Hisoka had no idea that as he spoke he had buried his hand in Tsuzuki's hair. An unconscious gesture for comfort and reassurance as he spoke his worst fears.

"I- I think Muraki is behind this." A tense silence settled over the now somber group. Hisoka tightened his hold when he felt Tsuzuki move his head onto his lap and clasped the hand that had reached for his free one. Feeling the same worry he himself felt from Tsuzuki made him felt oddly reassured. Or maybe it was the reassurance Tsuzuki was sending him along with his warmth.

He briefly thought of concentrating on their joined hands but discarded it. He wanted to be treated as an equal and hiding like a child was not the way to achieve it. He forced himself to raise his chin up while facing his fears, it did not hurt that he had Tsuzuki by his side. Clearing his throat he explained "It seems logical. Who else knows about us and is obsessed? Who could manipulate people so well and be able to hide it. The voice sounded extremely frightened and I- I recognized that kind of fear." He whispered.

He felt compassion and understanding from Watari, but no pity. Tatsumi well, he never could feel anything besides random anger when something went wrong. But Tsuzuki, by the gods, he was unshakable warmth and reassurance. Hisoka was afraid he had gotten used to it in a very short amount of time. Or was it because he had always felt it at the back of his mind?

He shook his head. Now was not the time. "And for the final kicker" he said in a dry tone "It just so happens that this 'trap' is being orchestrated at a cathedral." Watari stood up and stretched "Well Bon can't argue with your logic." He said before plopping down on Tatsumis lap. Nobody moved and nobody breathed.

"Watari-san" Tatsumi finally found his voice "What the hell do you think you are doing?" Watari merely pouted and linked and arm across Tatsumis shoulders for balance as he found a more comfortable position on his lap.

"Well this seems like it's going to be a long conversation and the floor is quite uncomfortable and the bed is all taken." Tatsumi took a deep breath and immediately regretted it.

He could smell Wataris shampoo something flowery but not unpleasant. Sort of like standing in the middle of a garden. Tatsumi mentally shook his head, he was most definitely _not _thinking about Yukatas hair. '_Yukata?' _he groaned. But he had to admit it did kind of feel nice. He suddenly remembered there was an empath in the room and looked to see Kurosaki giving him a weird look.

'_Oh shit'_ he nearly sighed in relief when Hisoka shrugged his shoulders lightly and gave him a look that said if-you-don't-say-anything-about-me- I won't-say-anything-about you.

"Watari-san under no conditions are you ever to tell anyone about this. Am I understood?" Wataris grin was like the cat that had gotten the cream _'Oh bad Watri. No dirty thoughts. But he never said I couldn't do it again.' _he thought smugly.

When he heard a throat clear he looked to see Bon with and eyebrow raised and it looked like he was trying to fight a blush down. '_Oh, whoops sorry Bon! I'll keep it down'_ he tried sending out merrily while smiling sheepishly. Hisoka rolled his eyes and ignored Tsuzuki's inquiring eyes. They really did not need any more drama right now.


	4. Chapter 4

**I would like to thank all of you who reviewed. I can't tell you how glad I was when I read your comments as they told me I was doing a good job and the stubborn story is going the way I planned.**

**I'm glad to see so many people enjoy my story and I would really appreciate a review even if it is very short **

Hisoka awoke to a warm and restful sensation. Something he was coming fast addicted to. He had woken up like this for the last four days, this being his fifth. The only difference was that today he didn't freak out like the first day, or jump up and run to the bathroom like the last three days. He did however become tense, he couldn't help it. Never in his life or death had he woken up wrapped up in some ones arms, and the few times he had, he shuddered and tried his hardest to forget.

Taking small careful breaths he tried to calm his racing heart and rising demons. He opened his eyes and focused on the black tank in front of him. He curled his fist tighter against the material and tried to relax his muscles. He did not register the hands that began to make soothing circles on his back until he found himself relaxed completely.

Looking up he saw a tender smile on his partners face. He blushed and burrowed his head into the older mans chest not caring if it where childish or to forward. At the moment he wanted to soak up all the warmth he could before they had to face their nightmares. It seemed Tsuzuki was of the same mind as he tightened his arms and let a contented sigh pass his lips. Hisoka could feel the joy that radiated from Tsuzuki, under it was a layer of protectiveness, something Hisoka realized he did not mind at all.

After four days of fruitless search the partners where becoming disheartened as well as a little relieved; no hardship or heartache meant no Muraki. But they where frustrated at not being able to get anywhere in their case. Reluctantly Hisoka rolled over and stretched feeling energized despite his worry. _'Guess it comes from getting a goodnights sleep'_

Hisoka was thankful for the restful nights he had in his partners' arms. They always slept on their respective side of the bed but when a nightmare began to overtake Hisoka Tsuzuki would come and comfort him. Hisoka blushed and frowned a little, he never remembered actually waking up in any instance. The nightmares simply seemed to recede with the light of Tsuzuki's sweet dreams or reassurance. He was going to follow deeper into this train of thought when he saw the little digital clock on the nightstand.

"Oh my God! Tsuzuki you lazy ass! Get up!" he screamed. When Tsuzuki just grunted and turned onto his stomach and pulling the pillow Hisoka had abandoned over his head Hisoka narrowed his eyes and snatched the pillow away and began bashing him with it!

"Ow ow ow! Hisoka!" Tsuzuki whined while trying to roll away from the attacking pillows only to end up on the floor. He cautiously raised his head and saw Hisoka kneeling on the bed breathing a little heavily with an adorable blush and still clutching the abused pillow.

He was yelling something but it all sounded like a faint buzz to Tsuzuki.

Hisoka had just managed to find the spot where the sun sneaked past the curtains and was now sitting on the ray of light illuminating his blond hair and reviling the sparkle in his emerald eyes. His simple navy blue sleep shirt was a little too big and slipped of his right shoulder exposing the creamy skin to the light and Tsuzuki's enthralled eyes. So intent in his fascination he did not see the pillow lobbed at his face. He fell over backwards from the impact.

"Mou! Hsioka you're so mean" he said sitting up again and rubbing his head. Hisoka snorted

"Not like much can hurt that brick that passes off as your head" came his swift report. He had fixed his shirt and his previous blush had intensified "Besides you heard absolutely nothing of what I had been telling you."

Tsuzuki tried to defend himself as Hisoka got off the bed and headed for the dresser "It's not like I could concentrate much when being attacked by a pillow" _'Especially if it smell like you'_

That thought earned him a pair of socks hurled at his abused head hitting dead center on his forehead. "Baka!" Hisoka tried to snarl but was ruined by the light stuttering and bright blush. " I was _telling _you" began Hisoka only to glare threateningly when Tsuzuki muttered "More like yelling"

Tsuzuki backed away with his hands in the air signaling for peace "That its 1:30 in the _afternoon! I told_ you to set the alarm at 6:30 AM!"

"I know 'Soka and I did but, well I guess I might have hit the off button instead of the snooze button." he said sheepishly. Hisoka just sighed in exasperation.

Well there was nothing he could do now. He'd take a quick bath ad they'd head out again he thought as he closed the door. Tsuzuki sighed and slumped against the bed rubbing his tired eyes. He hated to lie to Hisoka and tried very hard not to but he didn't know how Hisoka would take the real truth why they had woken up so late.

Hisoka had another nightmare, something Tsuzuki had begun to suspect happened every night, but this time it had been worse than the last few. When Tsuzuki had moved close to lull him back to sleep he felt a strange power emanating from Hisoka, lifting his sleeve he could see shimmers of the curse mark. Tsuzuki had stared at them in horror but was snapped back to reality when Hisoka had started screaming and crying trying to twist his body away from him. It had taken Tsuzuki about an hour to calm Hisoka down and another hour until Hisoka had finally succumbed into a dreamless sleep.

They had gone to bed around twelve maybe one and the nightmares had hit at three. As Tsuzuki had given in to exhaustion the damn alarm had started shrieking. He turned it off and was going to shake Hisoka awake but he saw the utter peace on the boys' face, something he rarely saw and couldn't bring himself to do it. Along with the peace there where dark circles under Hisokas otherwise unmarred features and Tsuzuki knew Hisoka was exhausted.

He jumped away from the dresser and plastered a cheery smile on his face when the door opened. He bounded past Hisoka calling over his shoulder that he'd be out in a jiffy. Hisoka noticed the false exterior on his partner before he shut the door. He blinked _'What had gone wrong? Tsuzuki is a social person if private, and isn't that wonderful oxymoron. But it fits Tsuzuki it even has his name in it oxy__moron. __Ok that wasn't fair'_ he berated himself but still _'What caused him to hide behind the false cheeriness? Was I too harsh with him?' _ He could feel a little guilt coming from his partner but… something told him it was something else.

Tsuzuki came out with his habitual black slacks, white dress shirt and ever crocked tie. "Ready 'Soka?" he asked as he picked up his trench coat and his jean jacket. Hisoka gave him a suspicious look that was answered with a grin before walking in front of him and opening the door. "Let's see if we can get to the bottom of this" he said. Either Tsuzuki choose to ignore the double meaning or it was lost to him Hisoka would soon find out.

-.o.0.o.-

This was the last cathedral they had to visit. They had spent the last days going to each one and scouting the area around questioning people for possible clues. If nothing came of this they would be back to square one.

They where taking a short break in a little park near the cathedral. Hisoka was using the trunk of a tree as support and Tsuzuki was sprawled on the ground next to him seemingly asleep.

Hisoka frowned, normally Tsuzuki would take any opportunity to touch him or be close to him since Hisoka had begun to allow these small touches. Tsuzuki also looked more tired than usual

'_He almost looks like…I do when nightmares...keep me up." _Hisoka narrowed his eyes

"Oi, Tsuzuki" he called out. When that only earned him his partners back Hisoka kicked his back slightly. If he wasn't so annoyed or concerned he might have laughed at the way Tsuzuki bolted upright a fuda in hand and twisting his head frantically form the left to right looking for danger.

"Over here, baka" Hisoka waited until Tsuzuki turned around to face him. "Why did you lie to me?" he asked point blank. He did not feel like playing Lets-beat-the bush, that had gotten him nowhere but facing a slow death without Tsuzuki and he was tired of it.

But he had to admit to himself that it was both terrifying and hard. Tsuzuki gave a nervous laugh "I don't know what you are talking about Hisoka."

Hisoka tried to steel his heart "Do you think I'm stupid? Or maybe just unworthy" he asked a little harshly.

He saw Tsuzuki abandon his pretense and steeled himself for what was to come. "I don't see how it would help Hisoka." He tried not to let the hurt sway him, but he could not deny the concern or tiredness in Tsuzuki's voice.

"It would help if you did not lie to me."

Tsuzuki glared, he was not having a good day.

"What do you want me to say? That I stayed up all night trying to calm you down while you cried and screamed in the throes of your nightmare? That it broke my heart to see you so tormented and being able to do nothing? Will that help Hisoka?" Tsuzuki turned away seeing the shock and slight hurt he had caused in his partners emerald eyes. He squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his hands, anger at himself for loosing his patience, disgust for hurting Hisoka and from sheer frustration.

He jerked and turned to stone when he felt Hisoka lean against his back his thin arms wrapping around his waist from the back. He did not move an inch as he heard Hisokas quiet answer "Yes. Tsuzuki we are partners, that means we don't have to suffer through anything alone. I know I'm not the easiest person but..I-I'm trying, it's just… not easy. I know I'm a terrible partner and an even worse friend but… I don't know what else to do." He finished in a quiet voice.

Tsuzuki did not, could not move. Hisoka really believed everything he had just said? He snapped into action when he felt more than heard Hisoka pained sigh as he let go and started to walk away. He jumped to his feet and caught Hisokas hand waiting for Hisoka to raise his head.

He tightened his hold when he saw pain, regret and shame reflected off the emerald globes that hardly ever showed any emotions. He managed to breath out two words before Hisoka turned his head to the side covering his expression with his blond hair. "Hisoka no!"

He was going to say more when he saw something glinting in the sunlight behind Hisoka. Acting on instinct he threw himself at Hisoka and pinned him to the ground underneath his body.

Hisoka immediately began to fight him and Tsuzuki cursed himself as Hisoka spiraled into his memories. "No no get off me ! Let go, please!" Hisoka whimpered over and over while trying to fight his way form under him. Cursing Tsuzuki rolled off the boy and set a shield around them hoping whatever attacked them wouldn't come after them before he got Hisoka back.

"Hisoka! Hisoka listen to me! It's Tsuzuki NOT Muraki. Come back now Hisoka. You are safe." He suddenly remembered what Hisoka had told him in the park a few days ago.

Hugging the sobbing and struggling boy, he ignored the pain and concentrated on broadcasting calming emotions while he whispered to Hisoka over and over again that he was safe with him.

Slowly Hisoka came back to himself. His throat hurt and he knew he had been screaming. All he remembered was feeling pain at Tsuzuki's silence and then he was being pinned to the ground by someone larger and stronger than him.

His memories that doubled as nightmares had invaded him viciously leaving him no chance to fight against them. Blinking he realized he was being cradled by Tsuzuki, who was shaken up and whispering that he was safe.

"Tsu-zuki" he croaked "what happened?" He was clutched tighter to the older mans chest while he apologized over and over to Hisoka.

"I didn't mean you any harm Hisoka. I didn't know you would have reacted like that when I pinned you. I should have know, damn it." He cursed. Hisoka was confused why would he pin him down? And for that matter why was there a shield? Where they being attacked?

That's when he saw it.

In the tree before him was a wicked looking knife buried halfway into the tree.

He whipped his head around trying to find who or what had thrown it. "Tsuzuki I'm fine but we need to get out of here. We're sitting ducks." He said while trying to disentangle himself.

Tsuzuki let go hesitantly and inwardly cringed when he saw Hisokas face devoided of any color and his slight frame shaking.

"What attacked us?"

Tsuzuki rose slowly to his feet "I don't know" _'but I do know who attacked you'_ he thought bitterly.

"Baka. I should be able to control myself better." Hisoka countered. Seeing the shock in his partners eyes he shook his head indicating this was not the time. "I don't feel anything. Can you sense anything?" Tsuzuki concentrated for a bit before opening carefully blank eyes "No" before they could say anything else they heard something rustling in the bushes behind them.

Swiftly they turned as one and faced what ever was coming shoulder to shoulder, sort of. They where shocked when a teenage girl walk out of the shadows holding another knife that looked as deadly as the first.

"Hisoka! That is one of the missing people!" Upon closer inspection he realized Tsuzuki was right

"I can't feel anything from her." As she drew nearer they could see her eyes where devoided of any life, just blank panels. "She is being controlled" cried Tsuzuki.

The stood warily as the girl approached them stopping a foot away from them. Slowly she raised her hand knife but something was terribly wrong. The knife wasn't pointed at them but at herself. Hisoka leapt towards her before she began to lower her arm intending to stab herself. He caught her hand and wrestled the knife away from her. As soon as the knife was out of her hand she stood quietly not moving, the only sign she was still alive was the slight rise and fall of her chest.

"What the hell is going on?" Tsuzuki asked as Hisoka stepped back slowly in case something triggered the girl into more aggression. They where startled when she turned and beckoned them with a hand to follow her. Glancing at each other and at the retreating back of the girl they shrugged and started walking in sync.

They where led to a beaten path that lead to non other than the back of the cathedral. Suddenly the girl stopped and looked to her right as if waiting for something. Tsuzuki and Hisoka tensed and eyed the area wearily searching for any signs of danger. Suddenly Hisoka clutched Tsuzuki's sleeved and motioned to his right.

Soft footsteps could be heard making their way towards them. Looking into the tree line they could see a pair of red eyes glowing for a brief moment before the girl in front of them collapsed. Tsuzuki pulled out a fuda ready to defend while Hisoka edged his way to the girl. He sighed in relief when he found a pulse and slight emotions.

Hisoka turned back to his partner "Tsuzuki, she is no longer under compulsion." Tsuzuki was concentrating on what ever had glowed in the darkness. What ever it was Hisoka knew he was not going to like.

Rising to his feet slowly he turned around and tried not to gasp. Before them was a beautiful teenage girl with thick black hair that shimmered blue in the light, falling to her waist. She had on plain jeans and an immaculate white long sleeved shirt and her eyes where as empty as the previous girls were. The only difference was…

This was Yoru.

The girl motioned them to continue up the path as she walked forward. Hisoka hesitated, he couldn't feel anything from her and… he had a bad feeling he knew what was waiting at the end of the dirt road.

Startled he looked up to Tsuzuki who had taken his hand and tugged him after him, his face a mask of grim determination. When he turned to look at Hisoka he managed a weak smile that Hisoka acknowledged with a squeeze of his hand. He could feel how Tsuzuki had strengthened his shields and was grateful. He knew it was hard keeping constant shields but at the moment they needed every resources they could and Hisoka could not afford to pass out from overloading on feelings.

Hisoka was startled when Yoru walked past him slightly brushing past him with enough force to send Hisoka into Tsuzuki side. Straitening up he continued stonily up the path a little surprised when they took yet another little dirt road _away _from the cathedral.

'_What Is he going to make us walk all day in hopes of draining us?'_ Hisoka thought grumpily after ten minutes of walking into the forest. They stopped at the edge of a clearing while Yoru walked into the center.

"My my. It has been a long time since we have last met hasn't it Mr. Tsuzuki? I see you brought my property back to me. How kind"

Tsuzuki's eyes narrowed dangerously as his hand clenched and unclenched over Hisoka much colder hand. "Muraki" he hissed. Hisoka had the strangest urge to giggle _'Well at least now we know I was right. I guess I've been reading too many mystery novels.'_

Marakis eye narrowed when he noticed their clasped hands and close stance. So there was something happening between his Tsuzuki and his doll. Well it was of no consequence _'On the contrary'_ he thought _'this will just make it all the more enjoyable when I break the boy for good. Such a waste of a beautiful doll.'_

Tsuzuki and Hisoka had to fight waves of nausea at the sick little smile that had appeared on Murakis face.

"Tell me Mr. Tsuzuki, what do you think of my latest experiment? You have figured it out have you not? After all I have had many pieces sent forth."

Tsuzuki felt sick "People are not toys Muraki! They are not your damn chess pieces!"

Muraki chuckled "On the contrary we are all merely tools. Some of us are simply better than others. Like this little jewel" he said as he ran his hand down Yoru cheek in mockery of a loving caress. Yoru didn't even blink seemingly unaware of the touch.

"She is such a good girl, well after I was through with her of course. She had so much fire, reminded me of you two. What a beautiful sight it was when she broke, the strongest one always do break beautifully wouldn't you agree my doll?"

Hisoka growled "I am nothing of yours, you sick bastard!" Maraki again chuckled "Oh I doubt that, I highly doubt that." And so saying so waved a hand.

Hisoka gasped in pain and would have fallen to his knees if it were not for Tsuzuki's hold on his hand. As the pain receded Hisoka let go of Tsuzuki's hand, not bearing to touch his untainted partner not while the marks burned painfully in his skin.

"A beautiful sight indeed." murmured Muraki. When the attention was once again his, Muraki continued as if nothing had happened. "I've been perfecting control over people. Of course I can already do that but I prefer _absolute _control. The first few couldn't take much I'm afraid and died too easily. This wonderful doll works as a perfect medium. Oh but you have not seen her perform have you? Would you like a demonstration?"

Tsuzuki's face was one of horror and Hisokas of grim determination. Seeing his captivated audience he turned to face the teen. He started to chant an incantation in an unknown language. They stared in horror as red marks similar to Hisoka began to appear on her.

From the corner of her right eye a line began to descend only to begin curling at her cheek bone leaving a glowing spiral in its wake. Thru the thin white shirt they could see the dull glow of more marks.

Hisoka began to shudder remembering how he had acquired his curse marks, the pain and humiliation. He wanted to cry for the girl and himself. As Muraki uttered the last of the incantation Yoru screamed and doubled over in pain. Falling to her knees she gripped the earth and banged her tiny fist against the unyielding floor. They watched in trepidation as something seemed to crawl under her skin. She arched her back and with a last agonized scream it happened.

Long black wings erupted from the girls back. Tsuzuki could only gasp and tremble as he remembered the time he had been possessed by the demon and the excruciating pain of foreign object exiting from his back as well as the pain and heartache that had followed close behind for everyone. She lay on the floor panting her new wings quivering with her body.

The wings were like those of an angel with the exception of the color. It was the color of her hair pitch black with blue hue. They appeared to be as long as the girl was tall and from what they had judged before she couldn't be more than 5 feet tall.

Muraki merely observed the girl like a bug under glass; a bug that he was disgusted by. Sighing in disappointment he casually kicked the girl to the side as one would an abandoned toy on the floor.

Yoru moaned lightly but lay on the floor panting. "As you can see it is still an unsightly scene. I haven't managed to quiet her down when she releases those beautiful wings. On the positive side those screams are delightful to hear are they not?" He was pleased with the reaction of the two shinigami.

They where staring with fascinated horror at the trembling trash. "Those wings are rather nostalgic are they not Mr. Tsuzuki? I designed them after your magnificent ones. A pity you couldn't keep them."

Tsuzuki snapped out of his trance like state and glared at Muraki "What the hell did you do to the poor girl?" he demanded in a deadly calm voice. Hisoka recognized it as the one when he was seriously upset about something and he was on the verge of resorting to violence with unparalleled power. Good they would be needing all the help they could get if this was to work.

"As delighted as I am for you to take notice in my brilliant work, I am afraid I can not say." Glancing to his right he saw the stupid doll on her feet again "Ah it seems she has regained mobility. Good, now be a good doll and introduce yourself." Nodding slightly the girl walked towards the frozen shinigami. She walked with such grace despite the extra appendages on her back that brushed the ground slightly.

Standing before Tsuzuki she held her hand out and stared blankly at Tsuzuki. Tsuzuki was at a loss on what to do. "Go ahead Mr. Tsuzuki she poses no threat to you. I am afraid I have only been able to perfect hypnosis on humans."

Tsuzuki flinched and dropped the hand he had wearily grabbed as if it burned him. She did not seem to notice as she turned and held her hand out to Hisoka. Hisoka slowly shook her hand trying to read any kind of expression on her face. Letting go reluctantly he watched as she slowly made her way back to Murakis side standing slightly behind him head down in a docile manner.

"She really is rather useless after her initial task, but alas one can not expect perfection from something so lowly. I believe I need something else and I'm afraid Mr. Tsuzuki that it is currently in your possession." He looked pointedly at Hisoka who only just resisted taking a step back. Turning back to the immobile youth he waved a careless hand towards the partners. "Why don't you offer them a free show?" He suggested.

Slowly she spread her wings and lifted into the air she flew straight up and then circled before swooping down. "Tsuzuki call one of your shiki forth!" cried Hisoka. Tsuzuki gaped at him "Hisoka she is an innocent! I don't…" he was cut off when he saw Yoru flying straight for them with something black in her hand that glinted dangerously in the light. Dropping to the floor they felt the gust of wind as she flew past them only to turn gracefully and flying up to gather more momentum.

"Tsuzuki please! Trust me!" Hisoka tried again. Tsuzuki took on look at Hisokas pleading eyes and began his chant for Susaku praying in his heart he would not regret this. A dark shadow zoomed by them seconds before Susaku came to her masters bidding.

Yoru flew past Muraki only to wheel around again. Hisoka was chanting and incantation to activate the fuda he held but what shocked Tsuzuki and left him momentarily paralyzed was the winged figure. In her hand was a fuda identical to the one Hisoka held. He watched in fascination as she threw it straight at Muraki and hearing the doctors pain cry when it made contact.

A low silky voice could be heard "You wanted a show? Well you got one you twisted psycho"

Muraki turned within his confinement. "You! But I destroyed your spirit." He cried angrily. He grunted and stumbled forward as Hisokas ward joined Yorus.

"You tried bastard! I'm not one to take this lying down." she spat back. Hisoka began running towards the pair and Tsuzuki dazedly followed, Suzaku hovering above keeping an eye on her friends.

Muraki began to chuckle "It seems I have chosen well then." He began to gather power and blasted past the fudas the backlash throwing Yoru a few feet away where she twisted to land on her side rather than crush her wings.

She rolled a few times before coming to a halt. She shakily got t her feet and watched as the angered doctor made his towards her. The black object was back in her hand as she waited on the ball of her feet. She knew she had hurt her wing on the landing and the lack of food and remains of the curse had sapped her energy making running nearly impossible.

Her eyes widened as she saw the orbs heading her way. In an effort to protect herself she folded her wings around herself. From somewhere to her left she heard someone call out "Suzaku, explode"

Parting her feathers she saw the clash of powers explode. She threw herself to the side hoping to avoid the remains of the explosion and hissed when it caught her leg. She heard her name being called out and turned to see the blond youth running to her, Hisoka was his name.

Suddenly her vision was filled with Murakis crazed face. How could she have not felt all that rage and darkness approach her?

"Listen well girl! This will not end like this and you will regret the treachery you have committed."

Yoru forced her tongue to unfreeze before she bit out "I already regret it. I regret your existence you depraved." She was cut off by pain as he placed a hand between her breasts the mark burning hotly down to her bones.

She felt herself being flung in the air and crash into something. Numbly she watched as Muraki managed to once again flee. She watched with dull satisfaction as he left but not with out a few hits on himself. Wondering what was holding her up she looked up to see brilliant emeralds eyes.

"Took you long enough" she whispered.

Hisoka looked startled. Tsuzuki bounded up to them. "Hisoka? Are you alright? Did you get hurt?" he asked frantically.

"Yes, baka, I'm fine but Yoru..." Tsuzuki blinked and finally registered the fact that Hisoka was holding a girl!

Yoru snorted and rolled her eyes pushing Hisoka away gently and swaying on her feet. "I'm sorry are you alright?"

Yoru glared "Well lets see my life has been hell until I found out an even deeper level of it with that psychotic murdering sadistic perverted fucker. I'm not to mad about the dead part although I didn't want to die that way and oh I was being controlled by the S.O.B that killed me in the first place and despite the fact that I'm dead I am in pain. So why don't you take a guess?"

By the time she was done Tsuzuki was hiding behind his smaller partner. Hisoka just stared and then whispered "Am I like that?"

Tsuzuki just nodded "Hm scary." was all Hisoka said.

"Since you know you are dead you know you have to come with us right?" asked Hisoka point blank. Yoru nodded "Well then shall we go?" asked Hisoka. The girl looked to her feet

"I- I know I have to go but, can I do one last thing before I go?" The partners eyes each other wearily, it was against the rules to do so.

"Please! I need to do this! It won't take long I promise." Hisoka sighed. He could feel the urgency and panic the girl felt. "Fine but we have to go with you." Yoru tried to protest

"Look Muraki is still out there and it against the rules what we're about to do so take it or leave it." They gave each other measured glances before the girl caved "Fine. But not one word about what I am going to do!"

Tsuzuki looked from one teen to the other. It was scary how their personalities where so alike, kind of like a mirror image. "This way" she motioned and began limping her way towards a deeper part of the forest.

Tsuzuki took a look at the sky night would fall soon, they had maybe an hour at the most and no flashlights. When he looked back he was surprised to see Yoru had stopped after only taking about half a dozen steps.

Concerned he went over to her and he could see perspiration on her grim set face. Looking her over carefully he saw one of her wings was slightly crooked and her leg was…burnt? It must have been when Suzaku exploded he thought guiltily.

"It's not your fault you know." Yoru said in a tight voice. "Quit blaming yourself for something you couldn't control; besides you helped me more than you hurt me."

Not waiting for a response she tried to limp forward only to stumble and fall. Tsuzuki caught her up in his arms. Looking down he could see a look of shock and red tingeing her cheeks.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she screeched. Hisoka was grinning in the inside, now he wasn't the only one who did that. Tsuzuki began walking in the general direction the teen had been headed careful with her injured leg and rather obtrusive wings. After jiggling her a bit she fanned one wing over his shoulder and the other rested against her back.

'_Yup just like Hisoka_' out loud he answered "Well I'm assuming it is something urgent you have to do. With your injured leg I doubt we'd get there anytime soon. Which way?"

It looked like she was going to fight some more but thought better of it. "See that little hill over there?" she said pointing west. When Tsuzuki nodded she said "Our destination is the base." Glancing at Hisoka they jumped in the air and flew towards the base of the hill.

The flight over there was silent each immersed in their own thoughts.

Landing at the foot of the hill Tsuzuki placed the youth on her feet and after a muttered thank you she hobbled off to the right. Pushing aside some brush she entered the cave not bothering to see if they followed. Wanting to giver her some privacy they waited outside despite their almost irresistible urge to follow.

A few minutes later she came back with a box. "I'm assuming I won't need anything?" she asked wryly. When they confirmed her belief she spread her wings and batted them testingly after she gained air she hovered around, satisfied she beckoned the two shinigami to follow. "I thought your wing was injured." called Tsuzuki

"It is. I just tied it off so the ligaments aren't too strained. Beside we're not going too far." She pointed to a lonely cabin and the edge of the forest.

Landing a few feet away she set the box down. Favoring her leg she sat down on the ground and reached into the box. Both shinigamis where startled when she pulled a calico kitten out and cradled him in her arms. She hunched over him and petted him murmuring things too low for them to hear.

After a few minutes she straightened her back and stiffly got to her feet. Placing the kitten back in the box she walked to the door and knocked loudly. When she a lone light came on she jumped in the air and glided back to the patiently waiting shinigami.

A woman perhaps in her late thirties early forties cracked open the door looking around. When she spotted the box she stepped out and crouched down. Picking up the sleeping kitty she called out softly into the night "Gods speed Yoru. May you find what you where looking for."

Yoru waited until the door was closed before she called out softly "Ja ne Tora(1), Karin." Turning to the two males she asked "Next stop?"

"Meifu" they answered simultaneously.

"Well what are we waiting for?" She tensed when she felt the two touch her shoulders and then the world fell from under her feet. The world didn't stop spinning and she slumped down. She was vaguely aware of some one calling her name. Struggling she opened her eyes to see gorgeous amethyst eyes.

Softly she whispered "Nice shields" before she was dragged into the darkness.

**Please leave a review.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank You all for your reviews! I was so happy when I read them. I can't believe you enjoy it so much but I am truly happy.**

**Up next fluff, heartache and a little twist!**

With years of experience Yoru staid still as if asleep the minute she woke up betraying nothing. Waiting and evaluating the situation around her.

"I'm telling you she will be fine. I set her wing back in place and took care of her injuries. When she wakes up we'll feed her and keep her on a steady diet. That's should take care of the malnutrition."

Yoru didn't know this person but he executed waves of happiness and excitement. _'Great my kind of guy'_ she didn't feel up to finding out what was under all the bubbly feeling right now.

Normally she would have in order to survive but A) she was already dead and B) she could feel Tsuzuki near. "What I can't understand are the scroll marks on her." It took tremendous will power not to flinch at the mention of the marks.

She heard a snort and a disdainful voice that could only belong to Hisoka

"Watari-san you should know by now those are curse marks."

'_Ok so bubbly boy is Watari and I'm assuming a doctor. Hisoka, fellow empath, is partnered with over exuberant Tsuzuki who has Susaku under his command. Hm never saw that coming. On that note how does he stand so many emotions'_ she wondered as she began to feel the faint throbbing of a migraine. A sharp command of shields and instantly the room stopped overflowing with emotions.

"Sorry Hisoka I totally forgot." cried Tsuzuki with Watari seconding it.

Hisoka raised a hand "Are you telling me neither of you had shields up?" When they both shook their heads Hisoka looked at the girl lying in bed. Was she affecting his empathy?

"Bon is everything alright?"

Hisoka looked puzzled "Watari do you have a theory on how empathy might react if there are two empaths close?"

"Actually Bon, I'm afraid I'm gonna disappoint you with that one. Is the girl affecting your empathy?"

Yoru was tired of playing possum.

"The girl has a name, Sparky." She said as she carefully sat up. Blinking she tried to adjust herself to the bright room. She was startled when she saw there where four people in the room. Two of which she knew, sort of. She would bet anything the blond was Watari, but she felt unease when she spotted the fourth man leaning casually against a desk. She had not felt him at all.

Hisoka gave a dry chuckle "Don't worry you will get used to that." He informed Yoru. Tsuzuki stood up from the chair he had been occupying the end of the pristine bed she was laying on.

"We haven't been properly introduced have we? I'm Tsuzuki Asoto. My partner Kurosaki, Hisoka. This is Watari-san" he said pointing at the cheery goldilocks "And that is Tatsumi." She blinked a few times.

"Is it a requirement for you to be gorgeous if you want to be a shinigami or did you guys just get lucky?" she asked.

Watari and Tsuzuki looked at each other and burst out laughing while the other two occupants turned slightly red.

"Oh I'm gonna like you sweetie." Watari said as he plopped back onto his chair.

It was Yorus turn to blush and she looked down at her blanket before glaring "Like I said Sparky. I have a name, It's Yoru."

Watari raised his hands in a sign of peace "Yes Yoru. Ne Tsuzuski notice any similarities?"

Tsuzuki nodded enthusiastically and both empaths rolled their eyes sending the two shinigamis into another peal of laughter.

A deep voice made Yoru turn to the silent man with glasses "If we are quite trough gentlemen we have work to do." He reminded them although it sounded more like a threat.

"To answer your question we rebound off each other. I guess we have about the same strength in our mental shields so we sort…synced for lack of a better word. It's like ping pong as long as we don't put our shields down the emotions will revert around us." She noticed the room had gotten unusually quiet and turned around from the pink wonderland she was staring at. "What?" she asked rather crossly. Watari always being the inquisitor recovered first.

"How exactly do you know this? Have you met other empaths or…?" Yoru held out a hand

"Easy there Sparky. No I haven't met another empath until now as for the rest, well that's private."

Watari actually pouted and slumped back in his chair. Tatsumi decided this was as good as time as ever to find out more information. "Well it seems that you will be staying with us for a while."

Yoru looked warily at him "Why?" she asked bluntly.

"They weren't specific about it." came his curt retort.

"Hn. By 'them' I'm assuming you mean 'higher beings'. So in other words its politics which equates to BS. Lovely." She muttered. Watari blinked

"You know for someone so young you seem a little too…" Watari groped for the right word. Yoru gave a sad little grin

"Bitchy? Apparently you don't go down to earth much. You should meet some of the girls around. Life is a bitch. I just decided to take a page out of her book."

Taking a deep breath she tried again "Sorry normally I'm not this impossible but with all these things happening, and well I'm not used to people."

Tsuzuki was concentrating on his shoes "I'm sorry" he called out. Yoru turned to look at him noting how Hisoka moved closer to him but didn't actually touch him. "For what?" she countered.

"I took you from your life, your friends." Yoru snorted and rolled her eyes "Oh please. What life? What friends? Unless you're talking about my imaginary ones those are transportable don't worry. Honestly! You take me from an existence of constant pain and misery and you apologize." She could see the shock and disbelief in his eyes, who needed empathy?

Hisoka felt startling blue eyes pin him "Tell me" she said "Is he always like this?" Hisoka found himself nodding his head.

"Well it's not an easy job" he began. Mentally he was screaming why the hell was he talking? "Kinda feel regret, sadness and guilt"

Yoru looked around the room as saw the same look in every ones eyes. Well except Tatsumi who found his papers the most fascinating thing in the world at the moment. Clearly confused she asked a simple yet complex question. "Why?"

Tsuzuki gaped "What do you mean why? We are immortal beings who take peoples life!" She could see this was what they honestly thought. Ugh the problems that arise when one is too close to the problem. _'Well might as well kick some ass.'_

"Idiots!" four heads whipped to look at her varying in facial expressions "You would rather let the souls of these people wander the earth in eternal misery? They will watch helplessly as their loved ones grow with out being able to share joy, sorrow or even frustration. Eventually their loved ones will die and they will watch over the new generation and repeat the process. You wish that for them? The living will cope; pain is to be expected. Besides it is not like _you _caused their death. As for you, don't you suffer enough? Yes you have immortality but not immunity." She fell silent letting her words sink in as she watched the sakura petals dance in the wind and blanket the ground.

Watari recovered his voice before the others. He could see Tsuzuki was taking the words to heart and hoped with the help of Bon he would be able to see truth in what the teen had said. A sad Tsuzuki was a heart wrenching scene. But this young woman, Yoru, her mental capacity astounded him. It was like a reflection of Bon except a female version. "Uhm, how old are you?" he managed to ask. She turned to face him.

"You don't know?"

There was no mockery just curiosity. Tatsumi spoke up "We simply assumed you where sixteen as that is what your medical file said."

Yoru was quiet for a moment before she asked "Do you know what day I died?" When Tatsumi told her she laughed a very sad little laugh. "Well damn. Like I said before life's a bitch. Of course I always knew the Fates had a twisted sense of humor. I guess it's a good thing mine matches it." she said it more to herself than anyone in the room. Focusing back she said "I just made it to sixteen." 

"What does that mean?" asked a curious Hisoka.

"It means I was born on February 14 at exactly 12:04 AM" That was more than a little creepy. Yoru had died the exact day at the exact time just sixteen years later.

"Why are there no records of you?" Tatsumi asked. She answered almost distractedly "My sires didn't want any documentation on me. It was easier for them to cross the red tape that way."

"Listen I know you have a lot of questions for me but do you suppose I could maybe take a day, you know just to let everything sink in?" Her posture was one of pride and maybe a little defiance but when you looked in her eyes, they where the same as that haunting picture.

Tatsumi adjusted his glasses. Well he couldn't see the harm in that. She was after all here for protection not an employ. "Very well but we still have to arrange where you will be staying for the time you are with us." He pointed out. She looked outside "It's fine I can sleep on one of the trees." Tatsumi thought he had heard incorrectly

"I beg your pardon?"

Yoru laughed lightly, sounding like bells tinkling "I doubt you ever beg for anything Mr.Tatsumi." she gently teased "But as I said I can sleep outside. It's how I've lived."

Watari laughed delightedly. Finally someone with a similar sense of humor if sarcastic and a bit caustic. "I would love to offer my apartment but uh, it's currently being remodeled." Watri said with a hint of sheepishness and regret. Hisoka found himself speaking before he thought it trough.

"She can stay with me." Four inquisitive eyes focused on him. "What? It's just an offer."

Yoru held Hisoka gaze for a long time, making the rest of the occupants shift nervously.

Suddenly the corners of Yorus mouth lifted on what an optimist would call a smile. "Thank you, Sharma.(1)"

Hisoka blinked 'sharma?' was that an insult or a compliment? He had never heard the dialect before. Before he could ask she turned her gaze to his still partner.

Hsioka was startled to find himself behind Tsuzuki a hand on his shoulder. When had he moved? He thought frantically. "Tsuzuki-san" Yoru waited until the man looked at her "I didn't mean to offend you." She offered as a way of apology. Tsuzuki tried to smile "No it's fine. Just got me thinking is all."

"Uhm Tsuzuki-san I noticed Suzaku partnered up with you and.." she was cut off.

"You know Suzaku?" three voices asked

"Well not know her. But I know of her. Does she still have a killer temper?" When Hisoka nodded his head empathetically she laughed a little "Well there ya go. But I was going to ask you a favor Tsuzuki-san. I know I have no right but…" she bit her lip looking her vulnerable age of sixteen.

"It's ok Yoru. If it's within my power I'll try to help you."

'_His compassion is going to get him in trouble, oh wait that already happened. Several times.'_ Hisoka thought crossly _'But I have to admit that is one of the reasons I am drawn to him. No wait I admit to nothing!' _he really needed to stop playing mind games with himself.

Taking a deep breath she looked up "I was hoping if you could ask Suzaku to rely a message to Byakko for me." The room hummed with surprised silence.

How did this girl know about Byakko and their existing realm? Byakko must have sensed Tsuzuki's call for him or at least an impression of his name because Tsuzuki heard his voice.

'**Do you need something Tsuzuki?**" He asked in his usual cheerful tone.

"**Byakko do you know a girl by the name of Yoru? She is an empath like Hisoka."** Strangely enough he could feel Byakkos sudden stillness. In a tone totally different tone from the one before Byakko asked **"Does she have blue black hair and eyes and an attitude with capital letters?"**

Tsuzuki was shocked **"Yes"** Tsuzuki was unprepared for what came next '**Tsuzuki please may I come out? I'd like to see her.'**

Tsuzuki was never one to deny some ones happiness and he could feel the anxiety mixed with barely suppressed excitement and longing coming from Byakko in waves along with affection. He could also see the longing and hope in the child's eyes. Tsuzuki looked at Tatsumi. It was against the rules to let shikigamis out in Meifu with out a good reason, meaning impending doom.

Seeing the pleading look in Tsuzuki's eyes he considered allowing it. However Tatsumis curiosity was piques. Just how was this pint sized girl related to a shikigami? She did not seem upset or even surprised at their existence.

"Yoru why don't we go outside?" he suggested. She was a little confused but opened the window and hoped out before anyone could stop her. They saw her glide gracefully to the floor and look up expectantly.

Hisoka could hear Watari scrambling for paper and muttering about wings and flying before he jumped out the window after his partner. It wasn't until he had touched the floor that he realized what he had done. This did not bode well for him. He was unconsciously reaching for Tsuzuki, losing control, something he couldn't afford.

Tsuzuki began to walk into the maze of trees the two teens following quietly and wearing nearly identical scowls. Finding a small clearing he stopped. Yoru would have followed but was stopped by a soft hand. Vaguely she felt a stream of happiness coming their way but her attention was focused on Tsuzuki, he was summoning Suzaku to ask she thought excitedly.

She froze in disbelief when he called out Byakkos name. This was Byakkos partner? A blinding light flashed and there stood Byakko guardian of the West.

He had his tiger form lithe muscular body tense in anticipation and wicked teeth at rest. His tail swished behind him softly as he stared straight into Yorus eyes. In a small lost voice Yoru whispered "Byakko?"

Byakko took a step forward. "Yes, Amaya(2). It's been a while." Yoru gave a cry of happiness, disbelief and a little sorrow as she ran to Byakko. When she was close enough she threw herself against him. Burying her face in his thick warm pelt, She felt him nuzzling her gently wrapping his tail carefully around her, mindful of her wings.

"I missed you! I missed you so much." She cried out brokenly. Byakko closed his eyes and purred laying down when Yorus knees gave out but still the girl would not release him.

To say they where shocked would be the understatement of the century. Jut who was this girl that took everything in strides and knew about the paranormal including Shikigamis? Feeling like intruders, they turned and walked slowly back to the office confident Byakko could take care of any possible threat. Nobody said a word each immersed in their own thoughts. When they got to the office Tatsumi tried for some normality.

"Tsuzuki, Kurosaki-kun why don't you start on your paperwork. I won't be expecting much but a brief written report would be appreciated. It seems we acquired more questions than answer. Tomorrow we begin." With that he turned and walked away.

Watari followed him hissing "You can't possibly grill the poor girl. Look at the state she is in."

Tatsumi merely glanced to the side not slowing his stride "She seems to be coping just fine Watari." Not noticing the slip or the gleam in the golden eyes of his partner he continued "We need answers. The department said she was under our protection but as Yoru-chan pointed out it was mere bullshit." He said as he opened his door not bothering to close it knowing Watari would follow him.

Sitting he moved his chair back almost absently knowing Wataris preferred to sit on the corner of his desk. He blinked confused eyes as Watari took a seat on his lap, _again._

"Watari I believe we have talked about this before." He began calmly. Watari merely waved a dismissing hand "We did but you never said I couldn't do it again. Anyways, I know we need answers, I know I'm burning to get some of my own. Like why are the curse marks still visible? Bon's always fade, sometimes longer than others but never a whole day. And those magnificent wings! She was human so she must have acquired them from Muraki but when I was examining her they where part of her, removing them would be like removing one of our arms or legs. And don't get me started on her intellect and warped point of view. I mean."

Tatsumi was a patient man. For some reason he had abundance of patience but today it seemed his patience had run out. He had approximately eight hours of sleep in the past three days attempting to do his job as a secretary. Which meant; keeping them afloat, collecting and filing reports, budgeting like a demon, trying to get his subordinates to do productive work (trying being the operative word here), and a thousand other little things that tended to blow up one way or another, often literally.

Give Tsuzuki and Hisoka-kun a helping hand and watching for sign of any of them doing something irrational or falling into the darkness of his mind. If _that_ wasn't enough they now had a case where they had a jaded civilian with enormous black wings, empathy and an attitude to nicely round it all out. This case had more danger and mystery than Wataris potions

Talking about the devil, his newest and most frightening addition to his stress factor was the man himself. He had to restrain himself from lecherous thoughts about said blond and Tatsumi was finding out, to his dismay, it was getting harder and harder to do. Especially since a part of him really enjoyed the idea of ravishing the scientist. What frightened the unshakable Tatsumi was he wasn't sure he wanted it to be just a physical thing.

That being the case it was perfectly justifiable why he wanted some quiet. And what better way for Watari to no longer talk? Well cover his mouth of course.

Wataris eyes widened to impossible sizes when Tatsumi crushed his mouth against his. He stiffened in surprise but when sharp teeth nipped his bottom lip playfully he groaned and closed his eyes opening his mouth and inviting that wonderfully sinful tongue into his mouth.

Tatsumi finally had a chance to do what he had been fantasizing for weeks now. He explored the warm cavern of Wataris mouth thoroughly enjoying the dark honey he found. Moaning softly he crushed a hand into the hair that had taunted him day and night. His hair was silkier than Tatsumi could ever imagine. Fisting a hand in the long tresses he pulled none too gently causing Watari to bear his enticing neck.

Nibbling his way down he was pleased when Watari turned his head to give him better access moaning delightedly when Tatsumi nipped one of his weak spots. Watari was in heaven, his silent love for so long was kissing him! How he had dreamed of this moment and he wasn't about to pass up his chance. He circled Tatsumis neck and slid a hand into surprisingly soft hair. Making a fist of his own he pulled Tatsumi into another mind blowing kiss.

Their tongues dueled for dominance before Watari conceded the battle after Tatsumi did some impressive acrobats with his tongue making Wataris already spinning head go for another loop. If his eyes had been open they would have rolled to the back of his head.

When Tatsumi heard Watari moan his name it was like ice cold water had been thrown straight at his face.

Pulling back he stared with growing horror at the man who was currently straddling him. Tatsumi realized he was holding him close with an arm banded across his lower back and one hand fisted in the messy hair. He watched as golden eyes slowly opened to reveal desire and contentment. Watari slowly came out of his high when he saw the look in Tatsumis eyes. It was a mixture of horror and desire.

Watari wanted to cry. He knew better than anyone how Tatsumis mind worked and he knew he thougt it was a mistake. Watari could feel his heart breaking a little and tears sting the back of his eyes as he slowly forced himself to release the one that had ensnared his heart. Slowly standing he took a shuddering breath and cut Tatsumi off sharply when he started to speak "Watary I.."

"No! Don't you dare say you are sorry Tatsumi! I've waited years for a chance like that! It was not a mistake but it did happen. I'm sorry you find it so repulsive but please don't, don't make me ashamed of the only memory I will have of us." He pleaded with eyes gone bright with tears.

Tatsumi sat stunned. Did Watari really harbor such feelings for him? Why does he look as if I crushed his heart though?

It was then that it dawned upon the shadow master. All those hints over the years he had passed of as partnership and even friendship. They where Watris true feelings! Watari smiled again, but it wasn't one of his usual cheerful ones. No this one was unbearably sad making Tatsumi realize just how special his real smiles where.

"It took you long enough Tatsumi."

Watari turned around and walked away but not before Tatsumi saw the crystalline tear roll down a smooth cheek. "Watari" he called out standing and taking a step towards the distraught man. He was stopped by the harshness in Wataris voice.

"Don't!" he said. Taking a shuddering breath he forced himself to face the cause of his bittersweet heartache "Just don't. Not know Tatsumi. I'm not strong enough, not yet."

His voice broke towards the end and he realized with horror tears where streaming down his face. Turning he yanked the door open and ran, ran out of the building and into the grooves not knowing nor caring where he was going when the pain in his heart was suffocating him.

Tatsumi san looked out the window to see a blur of gold streak across and into the tree lines. Tatsumi placed a hand over his chest where he felt a dull throb. Why did it hurt so much? He had done the right thing. Hadn't he?

In the covers of the trees a figure sat watching the events with a thoughtful look. Turning to the one alongside they turned and walked back the way they had come.

-.o.0.o-

Meanwhile tings weren't going so well with Tsuzuki and Hisoka either.

Hisoka could see Yorus words had affected Tsuzuki deeply, he was just that kind if guy. But the more he thought about it the more it all made sense. Sure he would still feel pity and heartache but maybe not so much now and perhaps the regret and guilt would bank down as well. Hisoka sighed and thumped his head on his desk, something under normal circumstances he would never do.

Hisoka was also worried about the changes he was finding within himself. His emotions, his thinking pattern and actions where changing rather drastically. He'd like to think he was maturing but deep down he knew it wasn't only that. It involved Tsuzuki and when it came to Tsuzuki, well he was confused.

So many emotions and commitments where between them, non that where bad per say but just frustrating at best. He didn't know much abut relationships and its rules. Sure he understood emotions but he often found them irrational. He really didn't know what was going on and he was scared.

He was brought out of his musing when he heard Tsuzuki call his name softly. Looking over he saw Tsuzuki staring avidly at one spot on his desk but he could see his mind was whirling frantically and not for the first time was he thankful Tsuzuki had learned to develop strong shields. "Do you think what Yoru said is true?"

Ah, he had been waiting for that question, and he did not question himself on how he knew what Tsuzuki was going to ask. It would mean facing things he was not inclined to at the moment.

"Yes and no. I don't think what we are doing is wrong. I'm sure eventually the souls would get frustrated and begin to hate, but I also don't think it is as easy as she made it sounds. There are deeper levels to it but I think she has the general idea." He was startled when Tsuzuki swiveled his chair to face him.

"Watari is right. You have changed. Not in a bad way but, I don't know. I can't say grown up because you always have been but I think…you see things in a new perspective now." Tsuzuki blinked and smiled sheepishly "I sounded like an idiot didn't I? Hsioka was trying his hardest to keep a neutral look on his face,

Insides he was glowing. Tsuzuki didn't see him as a child. He didn't stop to examine why that made him so happy. "Well no more than usual" he smirked. Before Tsuzuki could launch into his whining he called out a soft "Thank You"

The office was filled with silence again but this time it was a comfortable silence, one where they just enjoyed the company of each other. Suddenly Hisoka gasped and braced himself against his desk. Tsuzuki was up and next to him in an instant.

"What's wrong Hisoka?" he asked worriedly. Hisoka stood on shaky feet and stumbled to the window and murmured his friends name softly "Watari"

Tsuzuki had come up behind Hisoka and only saw the fleeing scientist. "What's going on Hisoka?" he asked gently rubbing Hisokas tense shoulders in an effort to comfort and loosen up his tense muscles.

Hisoka allowed a small sigh pass his lips before answering "I don't know but Wataris heart felt like it was breaking. He was in so much pain and I could feel his tears. Something happened to him." Tsuzuki was surprised.

"What could have upset him so much?" he wondered out loud falling back to their routine to solve something together.

"The only person I know that can reduce him to tears and break his heart is Tatsumi-san" said Hisoka rather darkly. He liked and respected his superior but he had also hurt his friend. Hisoka sighed again and rubbed small circles over his temples, damn emotions and their complication. That included friends, they where always there, _always!_

"We should go ask Tatsumi what happened" declared Tsuzuki but stopped when he felt a tug on his hand.

"No let them be for a little while. It's better if they try to sort their feelings out. Maybe you could visit Watari later on, I doubt you'll get much out of Tatsumi even if you are special to him." Hisoka tried to leave the jealousy out of his voice but figured he failed when he saw Tsuzuki's surprised glance.

Mentally cursing he spun away and started to head out. He stiffened when he felt Tsuzuki wrap his arms around him from behind. Hisoka pushed the initial terror that came with the physical contact and concentrated on Tsuzuki. Gradually he relaxed until he was leaning back against the older mans chest with Tsuzuki's cheek against his blond hair.

There was no need for words, they where just enjoying being together. Hisoka was startled when he felt Tsuzuki's hot breath against his cheek as he whispered "You have a very special place in my heart Hisoka."

The youth gasped and turned a light shade of red, that was as close as Tsuzuki had come to saying he loved him since Kyoto, nearly mimicking his own words back to him. The red deepened when he felt a soft kiss on his cheek.

Tsuzuki gave him enough time to move away or stop him as he made his way to Hisokas mouth with soft butterfly kisses. Hisoka was torn; half of him wanted to turn around and feel the pleasure he had experienced in the park again but another part screamed at him to get away, that path only led to more pain. In the end Hisoka couldn't resist the warm temptation and turned his head to meet questioning lips.

Hisoka stood still his lips pressed softly against Tsuzuki's, having never willingly kissed anyone besides Tsuzuki that one time. He felt nervous and unsure. He pulled back blushing.

"Hisoka? What's wrong? Too fast?" he asked gently. When he felt Hisoka shake his head he tried to peer behind the blond curtain that covered the boys eyes "What is it?" Hisoka sighed and slumped deeper into the mans embrace. He muttered rather irked but more embarrassed "I don't know what to do. I- I'll probably mess up and ruin it."

Tsuzuki's arms held him tighter if that was possible "Is that all he?" he asked "Don't worry there is no right or wrong way to kiss. Just do what you feel like doing and it will be ok. If it gets too much just pull back and I'll stop ok?" Tsuzuki asked

He made sure to keep his silent amusement to himself. Hisoka was so adorable sometimes. Of course he would end up kissing the floor instead if Hisoka ever caught wind of that.

This time he ran soft kisses on Hisokas right cheek waiting for the boy to turn his head. After a few minutes of hesitation soft shy lips meet his. Tsuzuki held still waiting for Hisoka to get used to it before he began to brush his lips back and forth against the cool silky ones he had wanted to get a taste of again. He was startled when he felt his bottom lip being sucked in to Hisokas warm mouth "Nnng"

Hsioka immediately released him apologizing and trying to move away before Tsuzuki pulled him back and sealed their mouths together for the third time. Hisoka felt a warm wet tongue lick his top lip before pushing past his lips. His startled gasp gave Tsuzuki enough time to slip his tongue in. Hisoka momentarily stiffened but melted instantly as a warm feeling ran thru his whole body and butterflies began dancing in his stomach.

Moaning lightly he opened his mouth further and shyly pushed his tongue back against Tsuzuki's. Slowly his arm crept over and circled Tsuzuki's neck pulling him closer. He wanted to drown in the warmth, the sweet taste of his partner. He felt Tsuzuki's hand slowly creep its way up to his shoulder and shivered from the butterfly touches against his stomach and chest.

He whimpered when he felt Tsuzuki's tongue retreating. He raised himself onto his tiptoes and followed the elusive tongue back into the warm cavern of Tsuzuki's mouth. Shyly he began to retreat when he felt soft brushes on his tongue urging him to come explore.

What finally gave him courage was the small needy moan he heard. It worked like magic heating his insides more and he boldly pushed forward exploring every recess of his partners mouth. He could feel Tsuzuki's pleasure in the way his muscles contracted around him and the heat beginning to increase and over spilling from his shields. He ran his tongue along Tsuzuki's teeth discovering something very interesting.

It would seem Tsuzuki had small sharp fangs. For some reason this made Hisokas stomach contract and he moaned low in his throat.

The wave of lust that rushed over Hisokas empathy left him reeling. He was not sure if it was his own or Tsuzuki's, probably a combination, but in that instance it did not matter.

He was about to turn around and push Tsuzuki against their desk when they heard the door open and a familiar voice "Tsuzuki, I was wondering if you could… oh."

Tatsumi didn't know what to make of the scene before him. Hisoka was on tiptoes, his back pressed against Tsuzuki's front, one arm slung around his neck in a backwards hug while his small hand held Tsuzuki's much larger one where it rested on his stomach. Tsuzuki held Hisoka to him with an arm banded on his lower waist and one across his chest.

Their lips where swollen and they where out of breath a pink hue to their faces. He could see the desire and horror at being caught. He had not suspected them to be so far into their relationship, although he had been aware it was headed in that direction.

At the moment however, it brought to mind his situation a few minutes before and he said "Excuse me. Just leave the report on my desk. For future reference please leave that for before or after work." With that he turned rather sharply and closed the door with a definitive click.

Hisoka slowly lowered himself and stepped out of Tsuzuki's unresisting arms. Both where blushing brightly and Hisoka finally managed to stammer out "Y-you should check in on Watari. I'll take Yoru to my apartment." A miserable silence followed. Not being able to stand it Hisoka grabbed his report and started to walk out only to be stopped once again by a gentle hand on his arm.

He knew it was a request and not a demand for him to stop, and he was grateful for that. However, he still couldn't gather the courage to turn around and face his partner. What made it worse was Tsuzuki's shield had been restored 100 The only way he could know what his partner was feeling is if he reached out or turned around, neither option being appealing to him .

Finally he heard Tsuzuki's tentative voice "Hisoka. Do you..regret it? Are you ashamed of us?"

Hisoka closed his eyes. Was he ashamed? Did he regret it? Opening his eyes he turned around to find Tsuzuki's gaze on him. Seeing how important this was to him, Hisoka gave him the honest truth.

"I don't regret it Tsuzuki and I'm not ashamed of any of it. But…" he felt a pang as he saw Tsuzuki's brightening eyes dim down again waiting for rejection "I- I still don't know where we stand. I mean..I..I'm just not sure what I _can _give you. Do you understand?"

Tsuzuki nodded and he did. Hisoka had never had to care for someone besides himself, always alone. All this was new to him and he was not sure on his abilities, especially with the torture he had gone thru. But Tsuzuki would wait and he would help when he was allowed because, that is what people in love do. Silently Tsuzuki opened his arms waiting to see what Hisoka would choose to do.

He couldn't help but smile when after only a moment of hesitation Hisoka moved in to his arms snuggling his own around Tsuzuki's waist. Hisoka could feel the relief and happiness radiating from Tsuzuki and answering warmth arose, different from before. This one was just happiness at being able to make Tsuzuki feel good and smile a genuine smile.

Pulling back he scowled and smacked Tsuzuki's arm with the report "Now get going. It is after hours and I need to give this to Tatsumi before he leaves and then I have to find Yoru."

Tsuzuki whined but let himself be dragged out of the office. Putting his trench coat on he informed Hisoka he would check in on them after talking to Watari. Placing a quick peck on Hisokas mouth he ran down the hall and laughing when he turned around to see a blushing Hisoka shaking the report at him threateningly and yelling out "Baka!

-.o.0.o-

Hisoka opened the door to his apartment and let Yoru in first. She walked in and took off her shoes at the entrance before moving slightly to the side. "Would you like some tea?" he asked. He felt a light blush when he saw her grateful smile motioning for her to follow him he made his way to his tiny kitchen. They stayed in silence but it was not uncomfortable or awkward. This puzzled Hisoka he never felt comfortable with people especially strangers.

"Your house is different. There are no wayward emotions" she observed. A smile snuck past Hisokas defense, turning to check on the tea he hoped she had missed it. "Tsuzuki warded the place off for me." he explained. Yoru did not miss the smile nor the degree of warmth when he spoke of Tsuzuki.

Byakko and she had hours to talk and for that she was grateful. Her world, although crappy, had crumbled around her. She had needed someone and who better than a god? She had planned to keep her distance from the lunatics but as she walked quietly along side Hisoka she thought over all she had seen as well as what Byakko had said and decided against it. She would soon leave even this world why not shake it up a bit before she left. Besides these people needed a good kick in the ass to get them going again. She guessed immortality left one rusty.

She sighed besides it would help her keep her mind off her problems if she concentrated on others. According to Byakko they where good people but had blinders that would not budge. Her specialty was truth, why not put it to good use? She was startled when a steaming cup was placed in front of her. "Thank you, Sharma." she murmured before taking a sip. Finding it to her liking she drank more.

"What does it mean?" Hisoka asked suddenly.

Yoru blinked in confusion at the boy in front of her. "This is the second time you call me sh-sha.. whatever it was. What does it mean?"

She smiled "I think it would be better if you found that on your own." Hisoka blinked then scowled

"How am I suppose to find it if I can't even pronounce it? I don't even know what language it is." Yoru smiled "It's nothing bad I can assure you. Tomorrow I'll spell it out for you and you can look it up."

Hisoka looked at her crossly "Is there a point to this?" She took another sip before she answered

"Actually there is. It will make more sense than if I just tell you. Besides I figured you'd enjoy the research." Hisoka just growled and drank his tea.

"Why do I feel like talking to you?" he asked almost angrily.

Yoru took not insult, she knew instinctively he was a private person with horrendous deeds done to him, similar to hers. Distrust and distance where instinctive.

"I think because it is easier to dump problems on strangers. Besides I have an honest streak a mile wide so you know I will most definitely tell you the truth whether you want it or not. Besides you feel compelled to talk an instinct you have repressed for a long time. Now that you feel something familiar it came back full force."

He looked grumpier than before "Then why aren't you spilling your guts" he asked irritated.

She couldn't help chuckling "Because I'm not repressed. When and what I feel I express one way or the other. I had to learn young if I kept anything in it would fester and destroy my sanity. Besides," she said with a half wistful half lovingly "Unlike you I had someone to help me when I needed it even if it was for a short time. I heeded his words and life became just a little easier. Our empathy is both similar and different. Each empath reacts different thus their empathy develops differently. I have accepted mine pains and all, while you on the other hand reject it making it harder. Of course I'm sure you have your reasons so please don't think I'm judging."

"You sure know a lot about empaths." She gave a sad smile

"Not enough Hisoka, not enough." Hisoka felt a pang of intense hurt and rejection before she pulled back

"Sorry, that happens around me often. I'm not used to being near people so I often leave my shields down. Before you ask I'd like to answer all questions tomorrow. You know kinda take the band-aid of quick?" Hisoka nodded.

"You know for someone who talks a lot you don't say much about yourself." Yoru was surprised

"You're very observant."

Hisoka nodded "I've had to be" Yoru said nothing and neither did Hisoka letting the silence settle down between them.

After twenty minutes or so Hisoka stood up. "I think you should take the bed." He began only to be cut off "Hh no please. I'll sleep on the floor it won't be a problem."

Hisoka shook his head and walked to the small living room he moved the small table he had set between the couch and his small TV. Disappearing into a room he came back with a folded futon. "We could fight all night about who would get the bed but I'm sure we would just end up overloading from each other." When Yoru only smiled he walked to a small closet and brought out a pillow and extra blankets. "I really do wish you would take the bed." He tried once again.

"No I haven't slept in one in so long I doubt I'd be comfortable. This is better." She assured him. Before he could say anything Tsuzuki appeared in the living room. Both Hisoka and Yoru jumped not expecting anything like it. "Baka! How many time have I told you to use the door?" ranted a red Hisoka.

Tsuzuki just grinned and shrugged his shoulder. "Sorry I am so late but I couldn't find Watari at his apartment. His landlady told me they where remodeling and Watari had gone to stay at a friends and…oh. Hi Yoru."

The teen just stared in disbelief. _This _was Byakkos partner as well as Susakus and apparently ten more. She couldn't help it she began to laugh at the irony. She had heard shikigamis often chose partners for similar traits but this was just too funny.

The couple stared at her and then glanced at each other shrugging their shoulders. "Sorry. It's just…well lets just say I'm crazy and leave it that." Hisoka smirked

"Yeah no doubt about that."

Yoru narrowed her eyes "Look who's talking"

Hisoka glared right back "You want to start something?"

Yoru sneered "Baby I don't start things I end them"

Tsuzuki laughed "All right children calm down before I put you in time out." The teens turned together and yelled "We are not kids!" Tsuzuki whimpered and shrank back.

Turning to each other they glared again. They turned opposite while giving a little huff arms crossed across their chest. Tsuzuki couldn't help but giggle "Aww you two look like siblings!" he cried out happily. They glanced at each other and then away snarling

"What?!?! Don't compare with that that snob!" cried Yoru blushing madly. Hisoka was equally as loud and equally red

"Snob! What about you, you conceited little witch!" Despite their words Tsuzuki caught the look of longing and regret in their eyes.

He then remembered they had been only children and abandoned. He at least had some good memories with his sister. He felt like a heel. Both empaths felt it and heard. Hisoka went to him and placed a gentle hand on his arm.

When Tsuzuki looked he shook his head and shrugged, Tsuzuki placed a hand over the fairy like one on his arm giving it a little squeeze. Yoru saw the silent communication and couldn't help delve in a little. She wanted to understand more of what she had seen and what she had heard from Byakko.

"So how long have you been dating?" she asked casually. She hid her grin and tried to look innocent when they turned and gaped at her. Hisoka turned the most interesting shade of red and quickly removed his hand. Tsuzuki's ears turned red at the tip and he stammered "We- uh.,,, were not uhm. What gave you that idea?"

Yoru couldn't help it, she laughed. "If you don't know that by now Malak(3), I'd say you are way behind on the program. But I guess that is none of my business although I must say I am jealous of you. To have someone that cares so much and never shirks from the darkness, well I'd say that is one in a million, don't you?"

Turning she left the two to gape at each other. She was exhausted and if she where completely honest she felt a pang of pain and jealousy at the obvious love they had for each other. Because she felt that she felt anger at such petty feelings but took comfort in the fact that they where superficial. As she laid on the futon and heard them getting ready to sleep she began to form plans based on the information she had collected that day.

These next few days where going to be interesting.

**1.Sharma: Hindi for 'comfort; protection'**

**2.Amaya: Japanese 'Night Rain'**

**3. Malak: Arabic for 'Angel'**

**Please leave a review!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Happy Holidays!**

**Quick note here. Yoru is my own creation and she does play a crucial role in my story (not Mary Sue style though). She is an intermediate between our 'bonding couples' as I thought they had enough on their plates to add on more relationship problems.**

**YNM + MeNo ownership, just dreams.**

Yoru looked at the people gathered around her and sighed, this was going to be harder than she thought. She hadn't been near them for more than ten minutes and already her empathy threatened to overflow and the headache wasn't helping any.

Currently there was a depressed Watari who, guessing from the reactions was new and disturbing. The supposable unshakable Tatsumi was deep in thought and the guilt and puzzlement was irritating. Not to mention the flashes of desire and denial.

Tsuzuki was happy but worried about everyone including and especially about Hisoka who apparently did not eat enough to keep a bird alive. Hisoka was irritated by his empathy as much as she was plus the added stress of keeping his feelings in check when Tsuzuki was close to him. It was a toss up, whether he wanted to be closer to the tall amethyst eyed man or push him away and run like the bats from hell where after him.

She sighed, on the bright side she had managed to steal a black long sleeve shirt and jeans from Hisoka. Now she was sitting in a conference room waiting for the nutcases to settle down so she could weave her tale of woe.

She was uncertain and afraid of that part. She had never talked to anyone besides Byakko and she wasn't sure if she could. But what the hell she had nothing to loose. She was going to leave these people in a short time, might as well leave them with something positive if she could. Taking a deep breath and steeling herself she cleared her throat to get their attention.

"I figured it would be easier if I just told you about my "life"" she made quotation marks with her fingers. "if you can call it that. If there are any questions after I'll try to answer them, alright?" When she got confirmation by nods and a soft yes she began

"You know when I was born and when I died. My sires where both Neurophysiologists (1) that dealt with the supernatural. I was a careless mistake. The reason you could find no records of me is because there are no records. They had me without anyones knowledge, they planned to wait to see if I was born with any 'gifts'. You see my biological mother had a touch of telepathy and my biological father had a touch of telekinesis. It was faint but there hence their proffesions. They figured their recesive genese might become dominante in their experiment. If there was no sign then they would give it up."

Yoru spoke as if she where giving a boring speech on shoes. At least the tone was. Hsioka could feel the resignation and witfulness along with the dull pain she felt.

"Apparently I showed sufficient signs of an extra sixth sense and they kept me. They trained me almost like a normal child except my schooling wasn't only English and Math. I was trained in the supernatural, as in you people and some other things that go bump in the night. After they realized I had empathy they exploited it and I was put thru rigorous test to find my limits and my capabilities."

What she failed to mention was that some resulted in near death. Massive blood loose, hemorrhages, migraines, etc. "In short I was a lab rat from the day I was born until I turned twelve. I ran away and nearly died."

Yoru stood up and began pacing her agitation clear in her short jerky moves. "I was taught to project and I had some abilities with telekinesis. I'd give you a demonstration but emotions are too high right now and I'm not too keen in going into another painful seizure or something. Anyways" she waved her hand as if it where just a report on bad weather "I ran away from the compound but it was nearly impossible. We all have natural shields, and some make them stronger. All of us here present are a testimony of it. However the scientist decided they where a blocking my abilities and removed them, keeping me in a sealed off room. I re-learned to make shield but they where very weak and hardly useful" she got a far away look in her eyes and her hands began to tremble.

Hisoka had scooted closer to Tsuzuki while Yoru had been talking and he was holding on tightly to Tsuzuki's hand. "I lived in abandoned shrine near a town west of Kyoto. There I meet someone who taught me how to shield and how to care for myself. He gave me his protection and was my respite. Heng You.(2)"

She turned her back to the room and lifted the braid that was folded five times at the base of her neck. Pulling down the neck of the shirt she revealed a tattoo. It was a white stripped tiger before a gate. Tzusuki gasped as he recognized the symbol.

"Byakko!"

Yoru turned "Yes, the shrine had been where people worshiped Byakko in the old days. I felt a strong presence and I was unexplainably drawn to it. That however is another story. Sufficient to say I was under Byakkos protection. I lived at the temple and explored the towns or cities surrounding the city for about two and a half years. One night the full moon was red and I had just come back from visiting a town. There was a man decked in white on the outskirts of the temple. I took one look and ran I tried to get into the shrine from the back but, alas I was unable to."

"I don't remember much of what happened except pain and a curse" she said as she pulled back the sleeves to show black marks on her skin. "They weren't there when I woke up in the hospital, I don't know how I got there but I do know I was diagnosed with cancer, although I suspect it was implanted. Then I died and Muraki came back. He tried destroying my spirit but I locked myself in a room Byakko had designed for me, hence why I am here."

"The room was the only contact I had with him at the time. For some reason he was unavailable to me. I was used to hypnotize humans and that is all I know. The wings where surgically and magically implanted although again I do not know how. Most of the time I was with Muraki is either locked somewhere I can not access or I was unaware."

The silence was intense and uncomfortable, each reliving a personal hell as well as trying to get their rational minds to wrap around the information just provided to them. Finally Hisoka stood up and slammed his hands down on the table startling everyone in the room.

"Damn it! How do you do it? I don't understand!"

The rooms occupants stared at the normally cool and collected teen explode. They had been aware this was a very sensitive case for them but that did not stop the pinch of pity they felt. He glared at them as he caught the emotion but forgot it as he was more interested in the answer. How could she have gone through all that hell and still come out ok, with out the emotional scars they all carried. How had she let go of her painful past?

Yoru read all these jumbled questions in his mind and was prepared to answer them. But before that "Maybe we should move this discussion somewhere else." She suggested. That was not what they had been expecting. Afraid he had heard wrong Tatsumi spoke for the first time. "Can you repeat that?" 

Yoru rolled her eyes "Can we go somewhere else? This room is containing all your emotions and I'm claustrophobic, so unless you want me to start freaking out and you loose any chance of talking to me I suggest we move somewhere else."

Hisoka did not even hesitate. "Where?"

"Remember that cave we went to, near the cathedral?" When he nodded his head she reached out a hand to him. Taking it he flashed out with her before anyone could move.

The three men just stared at each other in disbelief. Tsuzuki tried to explain "He is under a lot of stress. This is very similar to his death and Yoru has the ability to draw things out of him he would rather keep to himself." He looked thoughtful as he placed a hand on each of his companions shoulders "Actually she has that ability with everyone"

When they arrived in the clearing they found an impatient Hisoka pacing back and forth in the clearing. Going over to him Tsuzuki placed a hand on his shoulder "What's going on?" he asked.

Hisoka gave an irritated jerk of his head towards the cave "She said she needed to get changed" He was about to spin around again when Tsuzuki tightened his grip slightly, just enough to convey his request for Hisoka to stay.

Hisoka looked up to see concerned amethyst eyes. "You ok?" he asked simply. Hisoka thought about it, it was a simple question but such a complicated answer. Finally he tried to convey what he was feeling "Yeah it's just. We are so different and so alike and it's…disturbing" he finished rather lamely. He spun around when he heard footsteps.

Yoru walked out of the cave and they gaped openly at the transformed girl. Her outer appearance now reflected her inner one.

She was wearing black baggy slacks with handles on the side. Silver chains where attached from the bottom clip at her knees to her belt line. A black studded belt held her slacks in place. She was wearing a black long sleeved shirt with the words FEAR blazed across the front in molten red. There were loops at the end of the sleeves where she placed her thumb through giving it and image of fingerless gloves. She had a long thick braid the fell between her wings and black army boots. The tiger paw chocker and earrings completed her outfit.

"What?" she asked defensively crossing her arms and glaring. Blinking Watari stepped closer to her and circled her admiring the clothes. Snorting she decided to shake things up a bit "Watri, for a gay guy you sure are showing a lot of fascination about me."

Watari stumbled and nearly fell face first. "Excuse me?" he managed to squeak out.

Laughing Yoru shook her head. "I was teasing. Well at least about the fascination. I doubt this is the first time you've seen this sense of style." She smirked.

Watari regained his composure and smiled rather wanly "Well no but you look so different. Besides I'm thinking of stealing your ideas." She laughed

"Be my guest but before you start talking fashion I only pick out things in a hurry since I can't stand crowds and I usually shop at gothic stores where there are few people."

Hearing an impatient growl she faced Hisoka and began wondering how he could enjoy himself with the stick stuck up his ass. She cringed inwardly _'Bad choice of words'_ Shaking it off she took a deep breath and spread her wings before closing them again.

"Hisoka you have to understand that despite our similarities they are results of our past and our pasts vary greatly. You had been loved and that feeling soon turned to pain for you. I never knew what love was so I did not miss it. It left you deep scars but my mind is more analytical than emotional. I was taught to think rationally despite the emotions around me."

When she saw the understanding in his eyes she continued. For the moment it was only blue-black eyes locked on emerald ones. "You suffered those years because you where introduced to joy and sorrow, love and rejection, affection and disappointment. I only knew excitements and disappointment, anger and frustration. I was never loved, never good enough but I suppose it was a blessing since it did not hurt me."

"The difference between us is I became a fighter and you where a survivor. I merely existed not giving a damn about much of anything. You never had a chance to grow up or experience anything, where as I explored a little and learned difference in emotions and motives. I made my choices but those choices where stripped from you and who is to say how you would have turned out to be."

She walked up to Hisoka and placed a gentle hand on his cheek ignoring the automatic instincts that Hsioka had of recoiling. "I like who you are, who you have created yourself to be. With a past like yours, you are entitled to hang ups but it is your choice what you do with them. Do you fight to release them or do you allow them to bring you down? I had help from Byakko but you are not alone either."

And with that she turned him around so he could see Tsuzuki standing there for him. Flanking him where Watari and Tatsumi.

The men saw the vulnerable child that they rarely ever got to see. And frankly they often forgot that scared child, instead only seeing what Hisoka wanted them to see. Yoru stood behind him her wings spread out and they realized the silent message that she was portraying.

Hisoka was not alone anymore. An angel stood at his back and it was their choice if they would step up next to him and be his strength, his family.

-.o.0.o.-

The following days where tense and edgy. It seemed everyone had something on their minds and came into work looking haggard and half asleep. Hisokas nightmares seemed to have intensified and Tsuzuki was up half the night trying to calm him down. Yoru herself had problems.

One night had been particularly awful. She was screaming bloody murder and when they had tried to wake her she had thrown them against the opposite walls with her wings while her back was plastered to the couch. The curse marks had flared to life and Hisokas tingled in response.

She began to cry and called out Byakkos name over and over again until his tattoo at the back of her neck began to glow. Tsuzuki could feel Byakkos presence and it seemed Yoru returned to a dream state.

The next morning she had explained he came to her in dreams. Since then Byakko would help Yoru and Tsuzuki would look after Hisoka.

It was a particularly sunny day that Hisoka and Tsuzuki had to go to earth to follow a clue as to Murakis where abuts that Yoru got the perfect excuse to corner her first victim, erm target. Watari had forced himself to regain his happy face but where he was excellent at outer facades his inner shields where next to non existent.

Yoru had caught enough feelings and thoughts to put two and two together. Now she just had to put man and man together, in this particular case Watari and Tatsumi.

She pushed open the doors to Wataris lab with a bang and held the menacing coffee bin in her hand. "Watari! It tried to bite me! And it licked me!" she said point blank. Watari looked up dazed from the paper he had been staring at blankly.

He blinked owlishly before he realized he was no longer alone. "Ah! If it isn't my favorite Nekoyasha. How are you today?" he asked with fake cheerfulness. Yoru snorted and closed the door making sure to turn the lock. She really loved the nickname he had given to her and was pleased to see it had caught quickly along the office.

"Apparently better than you." she answered with her usual bluntness. His facial expression didn't waver but his heart began to race rapidly and his emotions took off like startled birds. "I don't know what you mean." He said as he swiveled his chair to look at her.

She sighed. She could practically hear him screaming for release. He needed someone to talk to but was afraid. Tsuzuki and Bon had enough on their plates as it was and the golden haired man did not want to add to the burden. Tapping the scientist gently on the forehead she sat on the desk so she was facing him.

"I'm an empath remember? And I can read your emotions a mile away."

Watari gave up and his face crumpled to one of misery. In a broken voice he whispered "I don't know what to do. He hates me."

Well at least she had been right about her theory now to dissipate his fears, well that wasn't so easy.

"Listen Watari, I'm not good at mushy talks nor at lying so I'm going to do what I'm good at and please forgive me in advanced." Saying so she turned him around and slapped him across the cheek leaving a red handprint.

"Get a grip Sparky! Listen while you are in here moping and groaning about your failed love did you ever stop to think that you never gave him a chance? You always assumed the worst and never put faith in the man you supposedly loved." Wataris eyes turned to her own vivid blue ones shock evident in them.

"I know you are scared and I know it hurts. I can feel it too, but you better than anyone else know how Tatsumi thinks. You know the reason he broke his partnership with Tsuzuki?" when he nodded numbly she continued softening her tone

"Then you know what might be crossing his mind. He is closed off for a reason and if you cow into this he will never get out. Have you noticed his un-Tatsumi like behavior? Well guess what Goldilocks, that's your doing baby."

Watari gasped "He doesn't know how to cope with his feelings. Now the moral of this story, boys and girls is: if you let Tatsumi think for too long he will come up with a loop hole. You know where you want him and you know he wants it too so what's the hold up?"

Getting to her feet she walked to the door. Before she closed it she called over her shoulder "You love him Ina(3) and it is not your nature to hold it in, maybe the only thing Tatsumi needs is a ray of light in his dark world to make him understand there is no harm in loving someone."

She leaned against the door and took a fortifying breath. It had been hard to stand in there with such raw pain but she couldn't stand to see him that way. True she had not know these people for long but for a friendless soul to find somewhere where she was accepted if even partially was like finding water in the desert.

She grinned as she pushed off the door. Watari seemed to be getting his spine back if his feeling where any indication. She hurried away as Watris mind began to wander into bondage and some other things she really did not want to know about. Now all she had to do was face the boogie man.

Tatsumi raised his head from where he had been attempting to make sense of the all the swimming numbers. He was surprised when he saw it was Yoru who had slammed the door closed behind her.

Yoru put her hands on her hips and glared in a manner that impressed even him. "Alright listen up Drama Queen!"

Tatsumi felt his mouth drop open. He was convinced he had not heard that. Yoru paid it no attention as she stalked over to him slamming her palms flat on his desk.

"In case you haven't noticed let me give you a quick report on your partner. He is depressed and his heart is broken. And may I add as a partner you suck. Maybe he does deserve someone better ne?" she asked snidely.

Tatsumis eyes narrowed and his shadows leapt along with his rising anger. Yoru just glanced at the shadows and focused her attention on the now standing and livid Tatsumi. Outwardly he was as composed as ever but restless days and sleepless nights riddled with guilt had slowly chipped away at his usually impenetrable wall. The walls where cracking and when they released it would not be pretty.

"That is none of your concern. I suggest you keep out of it." Yoru snorted

"Or what? Unlike you I can not sit back and watch someone suffer." A shadow rose and slammed her against the door. Yoru didn't make a sound as Tatsumi stalked towards her.

"You know nothing. Do not make assumptions." He hissed. Yoru broke the shadows hold when she spread her wings and poked a finger into Tatsumis chest

"They are not assumptions. I can feel his emotions! And yours for that matter. What are you afraid of Tatsumi? Why do you hold back and hurt him so much?"

Tatsumis eyes narrowed before he whirled around "As I said before that is none of your business. Now leave."

Yoru grabbed his shoulder and spun him around "I never heard you where a coward Tatsumi, don't you dare turn your back to me. I'm not one to take bullshit and neither are you so don't even try. Stop running away and face your fears."

Tatsumis eyes should have frozen her to the bone but the fire in her eyes held it back. A tic started in his jaw "I do not wish to discuss my personal life with you." He stated in a flat tone.

"On the contrary, you do. I understand you are a private man and I respect that but in this case you are not only hurting yourself but everyone around you. Now I am good at deflecting bullshit and telling it how it is whether it is pretty or not. I'm sure you can appreciate that so why don't you tell me what is wrong and let that venom out. I promise I won't run out crying."

Tatsumi slowly walked to his chair and sat down fighting an internal battle. "I don't want this attraction, this…this need for him."

Yoru felt for the man. She could see he had to practically force himself to say that and his eyes where as stony and blank as his voice. What was more heartbreaking was he actually believed it.

Man where these people fucked up in the head.

"Listen up and Listen good, Aatto(4). You're problem is not that you don't want him because you do. What you are is afraid." That got Tatsumis attention. Holding his blue gaze she knew he was deeply considering her words; seeing the truth in them even if he wasn't ready to face it.

"You are afraid you will fall head over heels for him if you haven't already. And within that you are afraid you will have to own up to everything you are. If you can not trust yourself trust him. He will not let you fall and he will not change you."

Tatsumi sat in pensive silence before speaking up "And if it is true? If I am scared? I am shadow and he is light, nothing will ever change that."

She sighed before walking around his desk. Placing her hands on his cheeks she forced him to look up. "I think you have to feel fear and pain in order for that love to be real. Love isn't always comfortable but it is worth it. It is your choice if you condemn him to the darkness of depression and loveless ness."

She ran a light hand over his rumpled hair and walked to the door. She spoke with her back to him and her hand on the door knob. "When the time comes to make a decision don't think about why you feel what you feel, let your strongest emotion rule your actions and find what was meant for you. And Tatsumi." She waited until he looked up from his desk. Smiling gently she said "Remember, there can be no shadow with out light. The stronger he shines the stronger your shadows become. They coexist together to bring perfect harmony."

The door closed to the office with a quiet click.

**Please leave a review!**

**Neurophysiologists****: Person who studies the nervous system (including the brain and reactins etc.)**

**Heng: Chinese for "eternal"**

**You: Chinese for "friend"**

**Ina: Chamoru for "illuminate; light up"**

**Aatto: Finnish for "noble wolf"**


	7. Chapter 7

**Again this anime does not belong to me nor its characters. Only Yoru is my own creation.**

**This chapter is dedicated to Trans and MYSOU. Thank you for your faithful and encouraging reviews. Here's some lovin for ya**

Two days after Yoru had talked to Watari and Tatsumi, Tsuzuki and Hisoka had returned looking tired and strangely enough distant. Hisoka had reverted to the angry teenager he had been at the beginning of his life as a shinigami and Tsuzuki had no clue what had caused it nor did he know what he could do.

He also noticed the unusually quiet and subdued Watari and Tatsumi rarely left his office anymore. To make things worse Muraki had simply vanished, there was no trace of him anywhere and the case was going no where fast.

Yoru found Tsuzuki sitting with his back against a sakura tree with a pensive look. Sitting next to him she silently offered him a donut and some tea. He took them with a grateful smile. After a few minutes passed Tsuzuki broke the silence "Is there anything I can do?" Yoru knew what he was talking about but she figured he was still a little lost. At the moment she was grateful for her early trainings.

"About what?" she asked neutrally. Tsuzuki sighed and tipped his head back

"Everything is just so wrong. Hisoka won't talk to me and I don't know what I did to make him act like that. Tatsumi and Watari are avoiding each other like the plague and Muraki vanished. And you…you are stuck in the middle of this."

Yoru spoke slowly as if checking to see if the words where right "What I said before is true. I have never been betrayed before. There was no one who I cared enough to let them hurt me. Actually the only people I have truly ever interacted with of my own free will are Byakko and you guys. I have been cheated out of many things and I have been hurt and alone but never betrayed." Tsuzuki was now looking at her.

"Each and everyone one of you have been betrayed on way or another and that wounds you. The only questions are how deep and have they healed? Each of you have kept to yourself for one reason or another and sharing isn't easy but, you also need to learn to let go." When Tsuzuki gave her an incredulous look she smiled lightly.

"I know it easier said than done, but in the long run it will only harm you more. You have had centuries to figure out how to work out your problems and here you are still struggling. It wasn't until Hisoka came into your life that you started to change am I correct?" At his silent nod she stood up "He is hurting and he is confused. Don't make him wait centuries like you did for light to shine down on him. He is a stubborn brat, but he has his reasons."

She knelt before him and put her wings around his bigger frame in a form of a hug "Listen to me well Malak; He needs you and that scares him. When he pushes you away give him enough room to maneuver but don't let him go. If you do he will only see it as rejection. His struggles are born from many fears. Are you strong enough to help him conquer them even if it means getting hurt in the process?"

She left him to think about what she said and went in search of Hisoka. What she stumbled across made her smile and her weary heart lighten up a fraction.

Watari had slammed out of his lab and was making his way purposefully towards Tatsumis office. Squinting he made out her wings and veered off slightly.

Watari took her shoulders and lifted her to her tiptoes and smacked a big noisy kiss on her mouth "Thank you Nekoyasha. If you can do me a favor and seal off the entrance to Tatsumis office I would be much obliged." He said as he dragged a stunned Yoru behind him.

First off the emotions he was emanating where so overwhelming it was all she could do to hold on to consciousness. And two…his hair was loose and his glasses had disappeared allowing his golden like hair frame his equally stunning golden eyes.

"I thought about what you said and realized it was just what I needed." Watari let go of her and sent her a nervous smile "Well here goes everything" he said before turning the corner to Tatsumis office. Yoru stared blankly for a few minutes before remembering what Watari had asked.

Looking around she made sure no one was looking before she plucked four feathers from her wing, muttering a quick incantation she threw them at the corners of Tatsumis office door. Satisfied they would hold she walked away whistling softly thinking today wouldn't be such a bad day after all.

Tatsumi looked up intending to send who ever it was away. He had given up on work and had been reclining against his easy chair his glasses discarded over the pile of paperwork. When he saw Watari leaning against the door he jumped to his feet. He could see these last days had been as hard on him as they had been on Watari. "Watari I…" Tatsumi began and like before Watari stopped him.

"No Tatsumi. I'll do the talking and you listen." Seeing that Tatsumi would do as requested he began to pace the small office trying to remember what he had planned out beforehand. Unfortunately he seemed to have left his perfectly structured speech on the other side of the door.

"I waited years for that kiss, and honestly I thought I would never get a chance. You had Tsuzuki and then it fell apart and I was there for you as a friend. I could have pushed my luck but then it would have been a farce, so I gave you time and a friend. Or so I made myself believe." Turning to face Tatsumi was the hardest thing. "In truth I was scared. I still am. I'm scared you will reject me outright, I'm scared you will say yes and it will fall apart too but you know what I'm most afraid of?"

Tatsumi slowly shook his head. He watched silently as the slightly shaking man came close to him "I'm scared that I will always regret not giving it a chance. I'd rather try than to stay behind you forever lamenting what could have been."

Not letting Tatsumi respond, Watari pressed his lips gently to Tatsumi cool unresponsive ones. He gently traced Tatsumis lips with his tongue before sighing and pulling back. Watari opened his eyes and was instantly lost in a blue sea of yearning and passion. He ignored the hint of fear and wariness he saw in Tatsumis eyes. They would deal with those later.

Watari pulled Tatsumi against him rather roughly by the tie and said "I love you Tatsumi and if you don't love, if you know that you can not love me then tell me now."

Tatsumi raised his hands and placed on over the one holding his tie and the other over Wataris smooth cheek. "I love you, but I don't know if I am what's best for you. If you are willing to take a chance on me I'd like to give it a try."

Wataris eyes began to shine with happiness and tears. He released a ragged sigh and laid his head on Tatsumis shoulder trying to get closer as he felt the hand that had been on his check lower to band across his waist. They stayed quietly absorbing the moment neither wanting to move.

Watari began to register the close press of Tatsumis body against his own, the warm breath that stirred his hair and he bit his lip to hold back a groan that threatened to escape. Giving into temptation he licked the skin just above Tatsumis collar. When he felt Tatsumi shiver a little he traced a warm trail to his ear where he delicately bit his earlobe earning a quiet moan.

Encouraged, Watari worried the delicate flesh and was pleased when Tatsumis arm tightened around him. Letting go of the tender flesh with a light pop he leaned back to see Tatsumis reaction.

He could have laughed at the look of bliss on his face but he decided to put his mouth to better use. Leaning in he placed a kiss on Tatsumis lips pleased when he felt Tatsumi kiss him back with no hesitation.

Pushing past unresisting lips he allowed his tongue to duel with Tatsumis own willing one. Both men moaned at the sensation leaning back they looked at each other and stared at each other seeing the passion and love reflected in their eyes. And then they where out of control, kissing wildly and tearing at each others clothe, trying to get to the skin that was so tantalizing close.

Tatsumi was surprised to find himself sprawled across his desk with his hands caught on his half open shirt with a shirtless Watari straddling him. Before he could comment he felt warm smooth hands ghost across his chest and bit his lip to contain a rather loud moan. He was unable to hold back a needy groan when Watari began to nibble on his neck and his talented hands began to play with his pert nipples.

Watari was insatiable; he licked and sucked every inch of the glorious body beneath him fueled by the throaty sounds coming from the man below him. When he reached the nub he had been torturing he wasted no time in biting it gently. He was more than happy to oblige when Tatsumi arched his back pressing closer to his mouth. He began to alternate between the two giving them stinging bites and soothing them with his tongue.

Meanwhile his hands where busy undoing Tatsumis pants. Tatsumi felt the zipper go down and struggled to free his hands feeling frustrated when he could not release himself to burry his hands in all that glorious hair. "Watari" he groaned out in desperation when he felt his hands ghost over his hardened flesh. Even more erotic was the silky feel of Wataris hair over his sensitized body.

Sitting up Watari grinned mischievously and ran his hands over his own naked chest "Yes Tatsumi?" he chuckled when he saw Tastumi lick his lips and follow the trail his hands took over his stomach across his chest and into his hair. Dazedly he tried to form words "Hands…tied…need…" it was to no avail as the half formed sentence ended in a deep groan.

Watari grinded his hips against Tatsumis and tossed his head back at the exquisite feeling that shot trough his body. Leaning down he whispered in a throaty voice "Do you want this Tatsumi?" he made sure there was no mistake in what he meant by grinding their erections against each other in sweet friction. Tatsumi hissed something that could have been a "Yeeeesssss"

Laughing he slid slowly down Tatsumis body and before he knew what happened his back was pressed to the desk and his pants gone along with his boxers. Looking up he saw Tatsumis glittering blue eyes and shivered. "You have tormented me for weeks now." Tastsumi growled and smiled feraly when Watari moaned rather loudly as he took his pulsing member in his hand running his hand over the sensitive underside.

Wataris eyes rolled back as Tatsumi began to stroke him "I can't wait long, I'll promise to make it up to you later" was the last thing he heard before a cosmic exploded behind his eyes.

Tatsumis remembered the last time they where in his office and grinned. Slowly he nibbled his way down Wataris neck until he got to the base where Wataris neck met his shoulder. Licking it gently he felt Watari wriggle underneath him before he bucked up with a shout when he felt teeth clamp on to the spot.

Watari knew he wouldn't last much longer with a hand firmly pumping his cock and his nipples being assaulted by Tatsumis other hand. Passion made him loose all inhibition or shyness he might have had. Forcing his arms to move he bunched his hand in Tatsumis hair and pushed down. Tatsumi had no trouble following Watari direction until he was at the mans stomach.

Looking up he saw Wataris golden eyes glazed with passion and another much stronger wave of need crash over him. "What is it Watari? What do you want?" he asked knowing full well but he wanted to hear the words from his mouth. Wataris already pink cheeks turned cherry red, he guessed not all of his shyness was gone. In a soft needy voice he whispered "Please Tatsumi, I need you." Was all he could manage.

Tatsumi knew he was at his limit but he wanted more. "Watari first hand drawer" was all he said before returning to his previous ministrations. It wasn't until he felt a cold substance on his cheek that he began to nibble lower than Watris stomach and hips. Taking the hand lotion he banded and arm around Watris waist and popped open the cap with his other hand.

Watari gasped when he felt something hot and tight surround his aching need. His hands scrambled for purchase and ended up in Tatsumis hair again. He began to guide Tatsumis movements as best he could as waves of pleasure washed over him.

Tatsumis talented mouth kept him occupied and happy while one hand prepared him for what was to come. He was close, so close to going over the edge when Tatsumi stopped. Watari whined in disappointment and lifted his hips silently asking for more.

Tatsumi lifted Wataris legs and placed them around his waist and was pleased when they clamped around him like a vise. Placing his hands on either side of Wataris head on the desk he kissed him deeply and slammed home. Both men moaned at the sensation and Tatsumi stayed still to both to give Watari time to adjust and to savor the warm tight feeling of being inside his lover.

Watari felt tears trickle down his face. Not because of pain but because he was finally with the one he had always dreamed about. Impatient for more he thrust up signaling that he was ready. Tatsumi did not hesitate pulling nearly all the way out and slamming back in. Watari groaned and wiggled around angling his hips for Tatsumis next thrust.

Tatsumi paused when he heard Watari scream looking down he feared he had hurt him. Pausing he braced his knees against the desk and took gasping breaths. Watari opened his eyes wondering why he had stopped. "Did I hurt you?" Tatsumi panted. Watari pulled Tatsumis head down "No but if you don't start going harder you will be!" he said right before he began plundering the treasure grove before him.

Never one to disappoint Tatsumi set to do just as his lover demanded. Soon both where near the brink after Tatsumi settled on a furious pace. Taking hold of Wataris neglected need he began pumping it in time with his thrust. Watari could feel his orgasm nearing and tried to warn Tatsumi.

Tatsumi noticed how close his lover was and bit the side of Wataris neck, having discovered it was one of his weak spots. Watari screamed out Tasumis name coming hard between their stomachs. Tatsumi followed soon after unable to withstand the tightening of Wataris walls and the sweet cry that came from him. Groaning the golden haired mans name he emptied himself inside the slightly spasaming body beneath him.

They laid on the desk trying to catch their breath. Slowly Watari let his feet dangle over the desk while lightly rubbing his hand over Tatsumis back. Tatsumi slowly raised himself on his elbows to look at the man below him. Watari arched a brow when he felt something stirring to life inside of him "Well you did promise to make it up to me" he said seductively. Tatsumi let the love he felt for Watari shine in his eyes as he smiled tenderly and brushed some hair of Wataris face.

"So I did" he said as shadows surrounded them and took them somewhere more comfortable. Wataris tinkling laughter resounded off the walls as they melted away.

-.o.0.o-

Yoru found Hisoka in his office doing some paperwork. She had been trying to come up with a way to get Hisoka to talk openly with her when all of the chances where shot to hell as a quiet Tsuzuki came in. Sitting in a corner Yoru did what she did best; observe, analyze and work out the problem until there was a solution.

"I'm going to go get something to drink? Anything I can get you?" Yoru said as she stood up. Getting a headshake she shrugged and began walking out. Hisoka looked up when he heard a pained groan. Tsuzuki and Hisoka jumped to their feet and rushed to Yoru who was on her knees doubled over in pain.

"Yoru what is it?" Hisoka asked concerned. He touched her shoulder and cried out falling on his rump. Tsuzuki reached out for him "Hisoka?!"

His heart bleed when his hand got slapped away and Hisoka hissed "Don't touch me!" Before he could do anything Yoru placed a hand on his shoulder "It's Muraki" she said in a pained whisper "He is summoning me. Well actually trying to get control of my body again but I'll be damned if he will."

"I know where he is. The question is do you want to face him now?" asked Yoru as she stood up, her posture one of defiance. Hisoka had uncurled but a haunted look had come over his eyes. Despite that he stepped forward "We have to face him sooner or later." He said.

Tsuzuki just nodded his head and placed a hand on Yoru knowing Hisoka would just move away and right now he needed to focus on the upcoming battle and not the pain that little retreat would cause him.

Fading out he let Yoru send directions in his mind and they appeared in the clearing they had fought the first time. The sun was a blazing fireball in the sky and in the middle of the clearing stood Muraki. However this was not the Muraki they where used to.

The usually controlled and icy doctor had wild look in his eye. As soon as he saw the three appear in the clearing his eyes filled with rage and hate so strong the empaths fell to their knees crying out from the sick and twisted emotions he was pouring out.

"This is the last time you broken dolls will get in the way between me and my beautiful Tsuzuki."

Pinning his gaze on Yoru he sent a low energy blast at her so fast no one had time to defend and she flew back falling heavily on her back "Especially you worthless bitch. Do you honestly believe you could get the best of me? That you are better than me?"

Yoru struggled to her feet and faced Muraki "I may be a bitch but I hold more value than you ever will. You're a sad imitation of a man who can't let go of the past and needs to prey on those weaker to make yourself feel powerful" she sent her own blast at Muraki winging him on his left arm "You are pathetic, you are nothing." She yelled.

The two shinigami stood in awe. Here was someone who stood up to Muraki, seemingly with out fear, but Hisoka could feel the fear and disgust she was trying to hide. Despite the nearly overwhelming fear she stood up to him, she fought back for herself. Catching the similar train of thought from her companions she spoke again.

"You have no hold on any of us Muraki. You forced compliance by brutality and magic knowing you could never gain it yourself." as she spoke she walked between Tsuzuki and Hisoka taking their hands in each of her own "They gave themselves to each other, trusted each other, there is nothing you can take of them anymore. Simply look at their power, their aura, what you seek is useless Muraki"

Placing Hisokas hand in Tsuzukis' she let go and stepped back. Hisoka felt the connection with Tsuzuki; something he knew Tsuzuki felt as well. They where forced to separate when an enraged and almost inhuman screech was followed with a powerful ball of energy. If that had hit, despite their healing powers they would have been down for the count. Yoru flew to the air and began circling above.

Muraki seemed to compose himself and began laughing in a manner only he could, conveying insanity and cruelty. "A fine speech for a broken nobody, my dear. You believe a few inspiring words will help? Let me remind you exactly what I have over you." He clasped his hands together and began reciting an incantation Yorus face whitened and she plummeted from the sky falling a mere two feet from Murakis feet.

Tsuzuki and Hisoka called her name as they ran to her and rebounded off an invisible wall. "What the hell is happening?" cried out Hisoka as he banged a fist off the shield. Tsuzuki shook his head and brought out two fudas handing one over to Hisoka while he began chanting. Simultaneously throwing them at the barrier they got a sizzle but not enough to break it.

They jerked as they heard Yoru pained scream rent the air. Muraki had kneeled down and grabbed her hair jerking it up, her curse marks began to glow brightly and her black clothes seemed to darken. Blood began to drip from her hands from the rivulets on her arm.

"You see, you are helpless to do anything against me. I have control over you." He whispered as he brought a bloodied hand to his lips and giving it an obscene lick. His head jerked to the side when Yorus fist connected sharply with his cheek.

Muraki snarled and backhanded her across the face sending her sprawling on the ground. He watched with malice as she laid there shivering and whimpering but still fighting to regain her feet. Tsuzuki began calling upon Byakko as he could not stand to see her get tortured like this anymore. Beside Byakko was desperate to get out, calling to Tsuzuki to release him.

Meanwhile Hisoka was yelling at Muraki "Let her go you bastard!" Murakis merely laughed seeming unconcerned that a shikigami would soon arrive in the plain with them.

"Do not be jealous my pretty broken doll I have not forgotten you. I merely need to dispose of this trash before I can concentrate on you and your current owner. After all our fates have been irrevocably entwined."

Hisoka cursed as he felt his insides freeze "I belong to no one but myself. If and when I choose to share myself with some one it will be my choice and no else's."

Byakko had appeared and crashed past the shield. He swiped a massive paw, intending to rip Murakis head from his shoulders when Muraki flew back. Ignoring the fleeing human Byakko swooped down and laid down until he felt Yoru wrap her arms around his neck. He lifted to the air carefully and flew away with her following orders from Tsuzuki to carry Yoru away from danger.

As Muraki rose to the air he laughed and called out "Take a look at the one who tried to rebel against her master. Tell me do you believe you will fair any better boy?" With a last taunting laugh he disappeared leaving the two shinigami on the ground cursing.

What had been the point of this?

All was silent as no one dared to move. Finally Tsuzuki placed a hand on a visibly trembling Hisoka. He felt the stinging pain as Hisoka jerked from under him. "Not now Tsuzuki We need to find Yoru and take her to be treated." Hisoka muttered as he walked stiffly away, his hands clenched tightly at his sides.

At the moment Tsuzuki wished he where an empath. He was fairly sure he knew what Hisoka was feeling and what he was thinking but that knowledge did not help him to get closer to the boy. At the moment he felt nothing ever would, but his heart refused to give up hope and he clung to that little bright light he so carefully guarded with wonderful memories of Hisoka and of them together.

They looked up anxiously when Byakkos form covered the sky to land gently next to them. His stance was protective and they could clearly see why. Yoru was draped across his back shivering and soaked in her own blood, her eyes haunted and weary of any moving shadow.

Hisoka suspected the only reason she was still rational was because she had the comfort of Byakkos presence. From her parted loose hair he could see Byakkos mark shine blue. It helped sooth and focus her like Tsuzuki's presence helped him.

Glancing sideways he knew Tsuzuki was hurting and he was part of the reason, but right now he needed to focus on Yoru. Sitting up slowly Yoru faced them, trying to still her shaking body. "I'm sorry. I thought I was stronger but I guess I miscalculated."

Both men where shocked. This slip of a girl had stood up to evil incarnate and she apologized. Before either could say anything she pitched forward and only Tsuzuki's and Byakkos quick reflects kept her from a jarring fall to the cold hard ground.

Lifting her gently he was worried he was injuring her, her wing was bent at an odd angle. "Sorry guys but my body won't seem to move properly, I think I'm in partial paralysis." They shinigami looked down in horror and Byakko let out a menacing growl. Yoru hurried to explain "It isn't permanent it's just the side effect of the curse. I should be fine in a few hours, providing I can rest with out moving much." She said in a hopeful tone.

Nodding Tsuzuki carefully straddled Byakko who had laid down to make it easier for Tsuzuki. Byakko called Hisokas name when the boy stayed frozen on the ground. Hesitantly he climbed behind Tsuzuki and grasped the lapels making sure not to make any other physical contact with him. Tsuzuki tried desperately to contain the hurt within his shields and at the same time rationalize them away, but emotions could not be wished away. He did however control his reactions to the hurt and self-disgust.

Yoru being at such close proximity and having no shield except those Byakko had provided for her could feel and hear all of his thoughts. Anger and sympathy built for the two stubborn males. Using the last of her strength she paved a way to Tzusukis mind

'_**Heed the words I have told you Malak. He fears the painful curse that was placed upon him and he fears the one who put it there. His insecurities and need to protect you are overwhelming him and he is afraid because you have become something essential to him, something he has never had to deal with before."**_

Tsuzuki's mind became carefully blank. Before she lost consciousness she heard Tsuzuki's quiet response _**'I am trying to understand. I know this is not easy for either one of us but that does not stop the hurt. Nor is the hurt so strong as to extinguish the flame of hope nor the love I have for him. It merely makes me hesitant and somewhat slow."**_

Fighting the lethargy that threatened to overwhelm her she motioned weakly for Tsuzuki to come near her. In a paper thin voice she called out to him "You are a good man Malak. I wish I had known you before. I understand how one such as you could have a partnership with Byakko and Suzaku." She brushed her lips gently across his before she let the numbing darkness engulf her confident she would be protected.

**Please leave a review. Much appreciated. **


	8. Chapter 8

**Happy New Years!**

**I had hoped to get more reviews before posting another chapter but I didn't think it'd be fair. Please leave a review. Much appreciated.**

Yoru woke up in a dark room and she began to panic. _Dark. Restrained. Pain. Humiliation_ it was then that she felt a familiar presence. Hisoka.

She forced her breathing to even out and slowly she began to unclench her stiff fingers one by one. Looking around she recognized this room as the infirmary. "You know I like the dark and all but this room is kinda creepy with out the lights" she called out amused when Hisoka jumped from his sitting position near the door.

Slapping the lights on he walked over to her side "How are you feeling?" Yoru gave him a dour stare

"I got the crap beaten out of me by a psychotic perverted murderer in front of three people and you ask me how I feel? And you are an empath" Hisoka snorted and rolled his eyes

"I see you are in a good as mood as ever. Shed the claws, kitty, or else I'll leave you here."

"Speaking of, where is lover boy?" she asked unperturbed by their light banter. Hisoka stiffened and blushed turning away "He went to the cafeteria for something to drink." Yoru was silent for a while

"How long have I been out?"

Hisoka turned to face her "A couple hours now." Silence reigned again.

"You are hurting him you know." Hisoka whirled around gaping at her. Before she could say anything more Tsuzuki walked in with two steaming cups. Seeing Yoru sitting up a relieved smile broke free. "Well I'm glad to see you are ups o soon. How are you feeling?" Yoru feigned a pain look.

"That is a standard question is it not? Automatic? Because if it is not, my dear Malak, I am afraid I will have to change my mind about you."

Tsuzuki got an adorably confused look in his face as he tried to figure out the meaning behind her words. Taking pity on him Hisoka walked over and took one of the cups

"Don't mind her she is just being impossible. I'd say because of her circumstances but she is a natural ass."

Yoru threw a pillow at him "Fine one to talk Blondie!" Tsuzuki laughed and stepped between them "Alright no fighting in the infirmary or else Tatsumi will…where is Tatsumi? He is usually here. For that matter where is Watari?"

He looked even more confused when Yoru burst out laughing uncontrollably. Tsuzuki looked over at Hisoka who simply shrugged his shoulders and circled a single finger near his temple.

Regaining control she tried to tell them between burst of laughter and gasps of air "Lets just…say...they are having….a night out….together….one that will…extended for a long time." She finished gasping with tears down her cheeks.

Hisoka hesitantly reached for Yoru and his face immediately burst into a bright red. Gaping he could only stare as Yoru began laughing like a lunatic at the expression on his face. Tsuzuki did not appreciate being out of the loop.

"What is going on?" he demanded. Hisoka turned to him and stuttered "Watari and…Tatsumi-san…together…." Was all he could manage to say.

Tsuzuki pieced the two rather jumbled sentences and a genuinely happy smile formed in his face "Well it is about time! They have been tip-toeing around it long enough. Even _I _got the vibes they where sending." Tsuzuki said with a little chuckle.

The teens stared in stupefied silence as the happiness transformed Tsuzuki. Where before was a burdened man now stood a young and happy man, taking years and its weight of his character. These where moments Hisoka always strived for, always cherished.

Tsuzuki noticed the looks he was receiving and a confused expression replaced the light joy. "Well I guess we should be heading home now" he said after clearing his throat nervously. He looked to Hisoka from the corner of his eye "You can teleport Yoru from here right?" When he received a silent nod he smiled but it was a plastic smile.

"Well then, I'll be heading out now. Take care ok?" he said as he hurried out of the room. The two teenagers stared at the door in disbelief. It was then that they realized they had felt no emotions from the other man. Tsuzuki's shield had been the same as Tatsumis, impenetrable. Turning slowly Hisoka laid a hand on Yorus shoulder and flashed them to his apartment.

Yoru did not need her empathy to see and feel the hurt and rejection Hisoka felt. It was clear in his emerald eyes along with the guilt and frustration.

Yoru was exhausted and wanted nothing more than to escape into the dark nirvana that promised to take her from her aching body, but the look in Hisokas eyes made her scrap up some energy and conviction. None of it however was physical as she sat heavily on the couch dragging Hisoka down with her.

Hisokas startled gaze flew to her face and then looked away with a tinge of red in his cheeks. The look in Yorus eyes was so tender and understanding it made his chest tighten with an emotion he was not willing to name.

He resisted lightly when she tried to turn his face towards her with a palm to his cheek. After hearing his name he slowly allowed her to turn his head but he lowered his eyes not willing to meet her gaze.

"Hisoka" she began "I'm trying to understand why you do what you do." Hisoka bit his lip and tried to stand up and was startled when surprisingly strong hands stopped him. "I'm trying to help you Hisoka and unlike the rest of your friends I don't take no for an answer very well, especially when the person is a stubborn and selfish."

His head snapped towards her a mixture of indignation and disbelief. Seeing she had captured his attention she continued. "Hisoka, I know you have reasons to fear, to doubt, but you can't let them dictate you. I'm not saying this just to say it. I also know it isn't as easy as I make it sound, believe me. Even if it wasn't for my empathy, it would have been apathy."

When Hisoka made no move to retreat except the light shivering she forged onward determined to get it all out. "You love Tzusuki, you know you do but do you know what your problems is?" When the shaking increased another little part of her heart went out to him.

"You are scared." Hisoka's head snapped up. "You know it is true. You are not scared of Tsuzuki as a man, but you are scared of how you feel for him No, not for what you feel but how much you feel for him." Hisoka's eyes widened and she could see his understanding shimmering in his eyes.

Hisoka knew this, but he had never wanted to face it. If he did not think about it, did not admit it he could push it away. But now here was a battered young woman laying it bare for him.

"You are afraid Hisoka and you have a right to be, but you don't have a right to string Tsuzuki around." The trembling increased but Yoru steeled herself against it knowing if she relented things would go back to the way they where before or perhaps even regress to a point where only heartache would result.

"It is not fair to keep someone waiting just because you are scared. It will only end up in pain. If you keep him hoping for something he can never have, you will only break him and his spirit. So tell me Hisoka why do you do this to him? To yourself? "

A silent sob shook his shoulders and when she put a comforting hand to his shoulder he jumped up knocking it away. With silent tears he battled back he poured out his fears. Fears he knew Tsuzuki would only believe where his and it would push him back, leaving a gaping hole.

"I am afraid! I'm afraid of how much I need him, how all I can think about is him, and about the pain that will surely come! What is something where to happen to me? Or to him? What then? All there will be is pain, I can't do it! I can't let him become that important to me but I can't let him go." He screamed.

He stood in his secure living room his chest heaving and his emotions and only his swirling around him. Calmly Yoru rose to him and laid a gentle hand over his heart.

"He already is that important or else you would have let him go in Kyoto." Hisoka eyes widened to an impossible size and fresh tears sprang to his eyes "But that is not a bad thing. To need someone, to cherish and to be cherished by is never wrong. Love can only ever be given Hisoka from ones own free will. True we often do not get a choice on who we fall in love with, but we fall in love for a reason. Their strength and weaknesses are all part of who they are. He has accepted yours but can you accept his?"

When Hisoka fell to his knees Yoru followed and pulled him in close for a hug. Tears pricked her eyes when she felt trembling hands grasp her shirt into tight fists. "Sharma, Love is suppose to hurt sometimes, or else there will never be true appreciation for it. Love is both destructive and power how you choose to accept it is your choice. Will you let it turn you bitter and break his spirit or will you let it guide you and him into a peace and wholeness you both deserve?"

Minutes of silence followed filling the room. Finally Hisoka's ragged voice reached Yorus ears "I want to help him, I want to take his pain away, but I don't know how. He won't open fully to me and I am afraid he thinks I am too weak because I can not conquer my own fears."

Yoru bit her lip after his confession. She made a quick decision and prayed to Byakko she was doing the right thing. "Would you like to find out?" she asked quietly. Hisokas head slowly lifted from the crook of her neck. "What do you mean?" he asked his tears stained face vulnerable for the first time.

"I can help you see into Tsuzuki's mind without you passing out from the emotions, if you wish." Hope trickled into his eyes "How?" he asked immediately. Yoru removed a wing from around Hisoka from where she had embraced him.

Hisoka felt power gather around them and looked at Yoru with shock in his eyes. She saw nothing of this as her eyes where closed in concentration. Taking a single feather from the tip she focused her energy on it.

Opening her eyes, she looked more tired than she had before. "I am going to help you do a simple projection. You may see, hear and semi- feel thing around you but no one can hear, see or touch you. At least as long as you are holding this feather."

She offered it to him, not saying anything else. It was clear she was leaving it up to him, his decision if he would move forward or coward back. He lifted his hand slowly, hesitantly and stopped a few centimeters from actually taking the feather, feeling the vibration of power within the tiny satiny object.

Determination came to life in his eyes and he confidently took the feather. Yorus smile was that of a proud parent. The last thing he heard before his world began to spin was Yorus encouragement. "Trust him like he trusts you. Fear and hesitation will only be as strong as you let it be."

Hisoka appeard in Tzusukis apartment and cringed. He knew it was often messy but now the sofa was overturned and various things where thrown on the floor and glass laid shattered. He could feel the inmense pain Tzusuki was feeling along with hurt, despair, anger and guilt.

Hisokas cluthced the feather tighter knowing if he let go the emotions would surely send him into a slight coma. He walked quietly to Tsuzuki's room and fell to his knees gasping. The room looked like a tornado had ripped through it and in the middle lay a crumpled Tsuzuki crying.

He saw Tsuzuki reach for a control near him and press a button before his hand fell limply over his head as if warding off a blow. Hisoka couldn't take it anymore, his heart was tearing at the sight of Tsuzukis pain and even worse knowing he was partialy to blame.

As he laid a gentle hand on Tsuzukis shoulder he heared a low angry beat start from the overthrown radio to his left. He felt it pulse in time with Tsuzukis emotions. Soon he forgot that as thoughts, memories and lyrics poured inot him. He could see what Tsuzuki was seeing, feel what he was feeling and it tore him open.

_**I can't escape this hell,  
So many times I've tried,  
But I'm still caged inside,  
Somebody get me through this nightmare,  
I can't control myself**_

_Tsuz__uki runnign as a child from angry mobs.He was being beaten while being called a monster over and over again. An older Tsuzuki laying in a white hospital bed with dead eyes slit his wrist and watched as his life blood bleed away and wishing this time death would be the resut._

_**So what if you can see,  
The darkest side of me,  
No one will ever change this animal that I have become  
and we believe, It's not the real me,  
Somebody help me tame this animal  
(This animal, this animal.)**_

_Tatsumi telling him he can no longer be his partner. The pain he felt as the words of the man he thought cared for him cut deeply. Tatsumis image wavered and fadded and was replaced by his green eyes full of wariness and some hidden pain.. The __first time Hsioka was hurt by Tsuzuki's anger, the times his emotions got the best of him and Hisoka suffered the consequences. The inmesurable guilt at hurting the one person that had always stayed with him._

_**I can't escape myself,  
So many times I've lied,  
But there's still rage inside.  
Somebody get me through this nightmare,  
I can't control myself**_

_Suz__aku disobeying his orders and killing the young girl they had been sworn to protect. Her screaming image engulfed in flames and his helplessness and rage. Days later smiling and acting as if another piece of his already mangled heart had not been carved out._

_**So what if you can see,  
The darkest side of me,  
No one will ever change this animal I have become  
Help me believe,  
It's not the real me,  
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become  
And we believe  
It's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal!**_

_Blood splatering on the walls with__ a full moon pouring in trhough the room as he cruelly and delightedly hacked who he had thought was Hijiri, later to find out it had been his partner. How both boys he had wronged came and saved his worthless soul. Tsuzuki banging his head against a brick wall wanting the pain to go away. Hisoka coming and taking him in his arms, comforting him and telling him he was human. The absolute warmth he felt at that one moment when he was wanted and comforted._

_**Somebody help me through this nightmare,  
I can't control myself  
Somebody wake me from this nightmare,  
I can't escape this hell  
(This Animal! x7)  
**_

_The devil demon taking control of his body, reminding him he was the black sheep, abandoned and forgotten by even Go__d. The pain as wings sprouted from his back the maniacal laugh that left his throat. Tsuzuki alone in his apartment. Always alone in the darkness._

_**So what if you can see,  
The darkest side of me,  
No one will ever change This anima**__**l I have become  
and we believe, It's not the real me,  
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become  
and we believe,It's not the real me,  
Somebody help me tame this animal  
This animal I have become**_

_Muraki calling him a moster. The sick ob__ssesion he nurtured towards Tsuzuki. The countless ways he attempted to gain his attention includng hurting Hisoka and anyone else he could find. Pain and sorrow followed him everywhere and touched those that where close to him. After all he was a moster. But Hisoka was always there walking next to the monster. Always watching, like a guardian angel to the lost and forgotten demon child._

Hisoka jeked his hand back and laid panting on the floor as eveything kept reeling in his mind. He was horrified that _this _was what Tsuzuki really thought of himself. Hisoka had hoped he had taken care of some of those ghost and was ashamed and deeply hurt that he had failed.

Gods how could Tsuzuki keep going? How did he cope with it? Reaching out a hand he placed it on his shoulder again. He was determined to find out his motivaation and an answer to help him.

Suddenly Tsuzuki jerked up and placed a hand on the shoulder Hisoka had been touching. Tsuzuki looked around his room before he called out softly "Hisoka?" Said boy sat frozen, Yoru had said Tsuzuki would not be able to see him if he did not wish it, had he messed up?

Tsuzuki seemed to realize he was alone and took a look around his room noting the upturned furniture and scattered belongings. Sighing he slowly got to his feet and began straighting things up. As Hisoka watched the pained and utter look of hoplessness slowly being drained until only confusion and witsfulness reained.

The room was clean in no time. Hisoka had sat down on the bed as he watched in quiet fascination and dread as Tsuzuki composed himself along with his room. Tsuzuki came and sat down on the bed a few inches away from where Hisoka himslef sat. Picking up a frame he ran his thumb lovingly over it and his smile looked bittersweet.

Placing the frame on his night table he put his head back and was instantly lost in an exhausted sleep. What caught Hisokas attention however was the small smile playing on his lips. Looking over he glanced at the picture and a little gasp left his lips. It was one of himself and Tsuzuki.

Watari had insited on them taking a picture when they had been released from the infirmary. Tsusuki had flung a friendly arm over his shoulders and smiled at the camera. Hisoka on the other hand had his arms crossed over his chest and scowled but he could clearly see how he leaned towards Tsuzuki.

Looking back at Tsuzuki he ran a hand over his brow intending to push stray hair from his forehead when he caught a floating memory. It was his face smiling gently at Tsuzuki. It quickly changed to his voice reassuring him he was human, hands clasped together and an inmense feeling of peace filled Tsuzuki.

As different images and memories of himself kept flashing in Tsuzukis mind tender emotions began to arise within the slumbering man. Happinness, peace and strength where beginning to fill him up and Hisoka pulled back as if burned.

_He_ made Tsuzuki feel like that? Was it realy him that gave Tsuzuki strength and happiness?

Too soon for him to register he was back in his own body. Blinking rapidly he tried to get his bearings back with out letting his dinner make a second apperance. When the room stopped spinning he looked down to see Yoru lying on the floor one of her wings draped over her body like a blanket or a shield. Concern flooded Hisoka momentarily pushing everythign aside.

Moving the wing carefuly he placed a hand behind her head and lifted her into a half sitting position. Her eye lashes fluttered before revealing tired eyes and dark circles that had not been there before framed the underside of them.

"You really need an ass kicking if you did not know that already." Where the first words out of her mouth. She lifted a tender hand and laid it on his cheek "How many times will you let him suffer alone while your fears keep you from becoming happy and in turn allowing Tsuzuki the same gift?"

Her hand slipped from his cheek and he caught it placing it gently over her stomach as her eyes slid shut with a small smile of encouragment and understading. Hisoka sat cradeling her while his thoughts raced and swirled around and around. His feelings, Yorus words, his own conffesion and the images and knowledge he had gained from Tsuzuki.

Sudenly an image of Tsuzuki smiling at him with love and tenderness filled his mind. It was then Hisoka experinced an epiphany. Smiling he gently lifted Yoru in his arms and laid her on his bed, thankful it was near as her wings where a bit troublesome. Covering her up he hesitated slightly before brushing his lips lightly across her forehead.

Slowly he walked to the futon in his livign room and laid down. Smiling he began to form plans for the next day. 

**Please Review even if it short.**


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm sorry I didn't update sooner but I pulled a muscle or twisted my neck and I couldn't get out of bed.**

Discalimer: I do not own YnM or the previously used song Animal I have Become by Three Days Grace.

**Yay I got three reviews this time Please keep them coming! Thank You.**

Yoru woke up to silence in the small apartment. She could not feel Hisoka anywhere.

At the moment that wasn't too important. She took a careful breath and sat up slowly. A wave of dizziness swept over her. When the room settled back her stomach began to alternate between cramping and feeling queasy.

Determined to ignore it she looked around the room for something to distract herself with. Spotting a note on the table she picked it up and grinned when she read the content. Deciding to take Hisokas advise she laid back down and fell into a fitful sleep but not before she prayed that all would work out.

Her time was coming soon.

-.o.0.o-

Tsuzuki rolled away from the annoying light that happened to hit him square in the face. It was Saturday and he had not intention of getting up anytime soon after such an awful night. He had the crapiest day yesterday and all he wanted to do was to wallow in some self pity for a while.

That was until he smelled something delicious wafting from the general direction of his kitchen.

Sitting up he did not bother to change out of his wrinkled clothes. Walking to the kitchen he blinked the remains of sleep from his blurry eyes. Then blinked again at the scene before him.

Hisoka, his tempermental –antisocial- Hisoka was standing in _his_ kitchen checking the pot he had boiling. Tsuzuki shook his head and rubbed his eyes. This had to be dream.

Hisoka snorted and didn't even bother to turn around "If this where a dream there would be pastries floating over my head." he said as he reached for two mugs. Tsuzuki's mouth dropped open and he slumped against the wall.

Hisoka turned around his eyes mischievous despite the light blush covering his face. "Quit gaping and sit down before your breakfast gets cold." he scolded Tsuzuki lightly with none of his usual hostility.

In a daze Tsuzuki did as Hisoka asked and sat in a chair never taking his eyes of the blond youth as he served him breakfast and sat down opposite him. Tsuzuki did not know what he was putting in his mouth as he chewed and continued to stare at the boy half expecting to either see him disappear or turn on him.

Finally Hisoka gave an exasperated growl "Look I just felt like making breakfast for you ok? If it bothers you that much I'll leave."

Tsuzuki could hear the undertone of hurt in his voice. When Hisoka tried to dash past him Tsuzuki caught his hand and pulled him back against him cradled between his knees.

"No! It's just…you where so distant yesterday and…I can't help but to think this is a dream." he whispered. Hisoka hung his head but did not move away. In a voice as low as Tsuzuki's he asked "Is it that hard to believe I would do this for you?"

Before Tsuzuki could answer Hisoka turned around in his arms, as though sensing the boy did not want to be released he tightened his arms around the small waist and was rewarded by a small half smile. Hisoka circled Tsuzuki's neck and searched his partners amethyst eyes.

"I wanted to do something special for you today. Partially to thank you for all you have done but mostly because I wanted to. Can you accept it with out questions?" he asked with none of the previous hesitation. Instead his eyes penetrated Tsuzuki and he sensed this was something bigger, something he could not quite understand.

But this was Hisoka; his reason for existing and Hisoka would never hurt him intentionally. He trusted the youth and so he nodded his head, his expression solemn but his eyes reflected the warmth that was spreading through out his body.

Hisoka half smiled again and leaned down brushing his lips lightly against Tsuzukis before going back to his seat. Motioning to Tsuzuki's food they resumed their meal in companionable silence.

Tsuzuki had been planning on finding an excuse for Hisoka to spend the day with and had finally settled on asking outright when he noticed the table was clear and Hisoka was standing over his tiny sink. Jumping to his feet he took two long strides and placed his hand over Hisokas.

"No, I'll do them. You cooked such a delicious breakfast it's only fair." he protested. Hisoka shook his head.

"I'll wash them and you go change clothes. We're going out, and before you ask I forgot to inform you I'm kidnapping you for the day, so any complaints you have will fall on deaf ears." Hisoka informed him while maintaining a straight face.

Tsuzuki blinked slowly once and then once more. "You ...are kidnapping me?" he repeated slowly and like the idiot Hisoka always accused him of. Hisoka turned his back to him "Yes. Now unless you want to go out in public like that I suggest you hurry and take a shower." As Tsuzuki opened his mouth Hisoka cut him off not bothering to find out if it was a question or protest

"I don't care. Go. Now!"

Tsuzuki closed his mouth and walked slowly out of the room, arguing with himself. He had wanted Hisoka to stay with him, but this was so out of character. '_What is going on?'_ he thought to himself as he made the smooth journey form his kitchen through the living room and into his bedroom.

It wasn't until he was gathering clothes that he realized he had not tripped over anything. Rushing to his doorway he peered into the living room and for the second time that day his jaw dropped. His living quarter was spotless.

He was sure he had not cleaned it , so why…._Hisoka _a voice whispered from within him. He had seen then, but why…

"Tsuzuki I swear if you keep standing there I _will _hurt you." Came Hisokas irritated yell. A small smile began to from o Tsuzuki's face before it disappeared completely and he scrambled for the bathroom Hisokas threat still following him.

"What's more, if I have to tell you one more time I'll leave and you won't get any sweets from me."

-.o.0.o.-

It was near sunset when the day caught up with Tsuzuki. He had been in a state of unreality, on his own euphoria.

After he had gotten out of the shower Hisoka had taken his hand and dragged him out of the apartment and down to Earth.

Since then they had been window shopping all day. Going into mutual favorite stores, book stores, toy stores (more for Tsuzuki than Hisoka, but the blond teen hadn't minded) antiques and of course bakeries.

They had just finished a delicious surprise picnic lunch Hisoka had prepared and dropped off in a reclusive spot deep within the park. Hisoka was lying on his back a foot away from him relaxed and full, a look of peace gracing his face.

Tsuzuki was lying on his side his head propped on his hand just staring at the absolute beauty that was next to him. He knew Hisoka had very few and far apart moments of peace and he memorized everything from the pattern of his breathing to the cloths he had on, knowing this image would get him trough his darkest moments.

Glancing around he smiled. There where more than a couple bags on the blanket they where currently on. They had bought little knick knacks at stores, books and sweets. The most important however was the cute puppy propped against Hisoka.

It was a beautiful Husky with black fur and purple eyes. When Tsuzuki had dragged Hisoka into a toy store they had wandered the aisles aimlessly until Hisoka suddenly stopped. When Tsuzuki glanced over he saw his partner rubbing the stuffed animals head a look of longing in his eyes that was quickly hidden as he realized he had been caught by his partner.

Rolling his eyes he had walked out of the store blushing. Tsuzuki had come out a few minutes later strangely subdued and offered the bag silently to a surprised Hisoka. With trembling hands the eternal youth had taken the gift and lifted the stuffed animal that had reminded him so much of the very man that had bought it.

He stared at it for a long time and an uneasy feeling began to uncoil in Tsuzukis stomach. Tsuzuki had stumbled back two full steps when an unexpected bundled had flung itself into his arms. He held the trembling boy close to him the dog squished between tem.

Neither had cared that they where in the middle of a crowded street. Tsuzuki knew the sweet "Thank You" from his blond partner had meant more. He had been both surprised and overjoyed when Hisoka had taken his hand and began walking down the street again. Hisoka had tightened his hand on both his gifts, letting the feeling of happiness and contentment run through his entire being.

'_This is the most amazing day of my life.'_ They both thought at the same time. _If only things would stay this way thought' _Tsuzuki. _'If only we could stay in this perfect world we created. No powers, no past, no taking lives and no Muraki.'_ As his ran through Tsuzuki's mind Hisoka picked it up.

Inwardly he sighed. This had been going so well but the hardest part was yet to come. But he knew after spending a carefree day with his Tsuzuki that this was the right thing to do. That did not mean he wasn't scared though.

If he did this, he would be totally vulnerable. Glancing at the man next to him he knew this was something he had to do, for both of them. Standing up he walked the few feet to the base of the tree that had provided shade for them.

He braced his back against it and called out "Tsuzuki, come here." The man was startled but did not hesitate to go to the younger mans side. Sitting next to his blond partner Tsuzuki was tugged down until his head rested comfortably in Hisokas lap. Looking up with puzzlement he tried to look for answers in the emerald eyes above him.

He softly whispered his partners name when cool fingers ran trough his hair, the sensation so pleasant and intimate he closed his eyes to savor it more. Tsuzuki clasped the hand that covered his tightly and gave a content sigh.

"Say Tsuzuki, do you know anything about my family?" Tsuzuki's eyes popped open to stare at Hisoka, but Hisoka was not looking at him. Instead he was focusing on the little river a few feet away from them.

Tsuzuki didn't know what had brought this on, but if Hisoka wanted to talk, he would listen. Shaking his head he burrowed closer to the youth. "My family is very old and well respected. When I was a very small child they began to mold me into the perfect Kurosaki heir ." he paused before he continued.

"When they realized I was different I must have been five or six." Hisoka swallowed and Tsuzuki knew what he was about to hear no one else had. Half of him wanted to stop Hisoka from remembering and opening old wounds but he knew this came hard for Hisoka and this chance would never come again.

He was honored that Hisoka trusted him with this but at the same time he couldn't help but wonder why now. He stopped thinking and paid attention when Hisoka continued.

"They tried to force me to stop but I couldn't. I didn't understand what was wrong with me but I could feel their anger, fright, but most of all their disgust. They where infuriated when I would ask. The first time they had me exorcised I must have been about seven. There where six more times they attempted it before they gave up on me and left me permanently locked."

Tsuzuki couldn't help the cry of denial, or stop his body from shaking but Hisoka seemed unaware of it. It was as if he wasn't even there with him anymore. "They always came to yell at me though. Never to see how I was doing or to comfort me. Why wasn't I normal? I wasn't their son I was a monster." Tsuzuki let the tears run down his cheeks knowing he was crying for both of them. Hisokas pain ran too deep for tears.

"They where right you know." He whispered as he tightened his hand in Tsuzukis. He felt the slight sting but was nothing compared to what Hisoka must have been feeling. "I was, am, different from other humans. Does it make me a monster Tsuzuki?" he asked in an almost childlike tone.

However his voice held a wealth of pain. Tsuzuki stared at the emerald eyes locked with his, their expression showing fear and confusion, the eyes of the child locked deep inside Hisoka. Tsuzuki sat up and lifted Hisoka so he was sitting on his lap, cradled within his arms.

Fresh tears swam to Tsuzukis eyes when Hisoka clung to his shirt and buried his face in his shirt. "No, Hisoka. You could never be anything close to a monster. You are beautiful inside and out."

Hisoka wriggled until he was sitting up and facing Tsuzuki, as if loosing his courage he turned his head away. "You won't think so when I am done telling you the whole story." Tsuzuki was going to protest but was silenced with a finger at his lip.

"Please, I need to do this. I want you to understand."

Tsuzuki said nothing but tightened his arms around the boy bringing him closer to his body in both a gesture of comfort and to keep warm now that night had arrived.

"They only wished for a way to get rid of me, but feared I would talk about them if they gave me away. I could feel their hate and disgust, heard their thoughts of me being a monster and how they wished I had never been born." His slight form began to tremble and his voice began to crack.

"One night when I was thirteen I wished the same thing with all of my being." Hisoka felt Tsuzuki stiffen and quickly wrapped his arm around his neck. He needed Tsuzuki with him. To both hold him, steady and keep him in the light and so Tsuzuki would finally realize just how special he was.

"I had managed to escape and ran through the cherry trees awed by their beauty until I saw him." Hsiokas body began to tremble and Tsuzuki knew that if he lifted the sleeve of Hisoka shirt he would see a faint mark, if not all of Murakis curse.

"I saw a man in white, something that represents pureness and peace, murder a woman under a blood red moon and rejoice in it. I tried to run but my legs refused to move. It wasn't until he was a few feet away that I managed to turn but it was too late. He caught me and tortured me."

Tsuzuki could feel warm wet spots spread trough his shirt and tried to make Hisoka look at him, but the blond refused to be moved. Instead he chocked out the words "He tortured me in every possible way and left me to die. I wasn't mad at the fact that I was alone or that my parents didn't care. I was used to that. What I was angry about was that I had to live such a miserable life and having to die the same way. Every day I prayed for death."

Tsuzuki began to run a hand trough the silky blond hair wishing he could erase all of Hisokas horrible past and give him the happiness and love such a pure soul deserved. Tsuzuki tensed when Hisoka began to speak again, his voice low and tired.

"I died after three hellish years and became a shinigami for revenge. So what do you think now Tsuzuki?" he asked with a little bit of anger tingeing his voice "I was different and abandoned as a child later to be tainted by evil. I took a job that takes lives for my selfish vendetta. Am I monster Tsuzuki?"

Tsuzuki forced Hisokas face up so he could see and feel the utter truth of his words "You could never be a monster Hisoka. You're heart is too pure for that." Hisoka stared back his expression unreadable now. "Would you like to hear the rest?" he asked.

Not waiting for an answer he continued making sure Tsuzuki never looked away. "When I became a shinigami I meet an angel in black. He is lazy and hyperactive." Tsuzuki lowered his eyes but quickly raised them again as cool hands framed his face

"But my angel wore a mask of happiness to cover up all the hurt. It made me proud and at the same time sad, for such a strong man to live with pain everyday and still find good in others. Wanting peace and happiness and doing his damnest to provide it to those around him."

Both shinigamis eyes filled with tears as the green eyed angel spoke "He made me realize I wasn't alone. I have a family who loves and cares for me. And as many times as I want to strangle him" Hisoka gave a watery smile and whipped the tears from Tsuzukis cheeks "he makes me laugh and feel cherished twice as many times."

"So tell me, my dark angel, who is the monster? The parents who abandoned and ostracized their own child? The cold blooded murderer who thrives on other peoples misery that he creates. Or the fallen angel, who despite being different brings joy and love to those around him despite the heartbreaking job?"

Hisoka was pulled into a rib breaking hug while his amethyst eyed angel cried, his shoulders shaking with his sobs. Hisoka let his tears come as well but they where from relief and joy. He could feel the fear and rejection within Tsuzuki bleed away along with the self- loathing. Instead being replaced by peace, awe and what Hisoka had been waiting for a long time. Love.

Neither knew how long they had stayed embracing each other, but nature would not be ignored. They felt the icy winds trough their little haven in each others arms. With out talking they quickly and effectively gathered everything and teleported directly to Tsuzuki's house holding hands.

They dumped everything on the floor and sat on the couch. Tsuzuki placed his arm over Hisokas shoulder and Hisoka leaned into the embrace.

Moments of silence fell between them. It would have been a comfortable silence if it wasn't for that little prickling feeling at the back of Hisokas mind. Sighing in defeat he sat up and faced a startled Tsuzuki. "If you have something to say just say it." he said firmly.

Tsuzuki lowered his eyes but Hisoka waited patiently almost sure of what the question was.

"Why today?"

Hisoka remained silent. He had know this was going to come up eventually but he had not anticipated how hard it would be to answer. He had prepared his answer but for some reason the words where all jumbled. Instead he asked something that nagged at the back of his mind. "You are not going to ask why I did it?"

Hisoka held his breath. Tsuzuki slowly shook his head "I'd like to think I know why. I just want to know why today."

Hisoka never took his eyes from the bowed head before him. Standing up he walked until the table was between them, needing to clear his head and concentrate on his own emotions. Tsuzuki had raised his head at the action uncertainty creeping into his expressive eyes.

"Yesterday…" Hisoka began hesitantly "yesterday a lot of things became clear to me. My actions, my feelings became clear to me." Hisoka shook his head "No, that's wrong. I finally admitted to them. Do you know why I went after you in Kyoto?" he asked.

Tsuzuki sucked in a sharp breath. Maybe this time, this time they would be able to say it. "Because you… needed me." Tsuzuki answered with a half truth. He couldn't bring himself to say those six words. He was surprised when he felt the couch dip inwards.

Looking up he was caught in a forest of green. "Partially." was Hisoka soft whisper. Tsuzuki felt the warm breath on his face as Hisoka leaned forward and said what he had been needing to hear, what his battered soul had been yearning for

"I went after you because, I can't live with out you." Hsioka voice was so low even at this close proximity he could barely hear.

Hisokas forehead rested gently against Tsuzukis "I love you Tsuzuki."

For the second time that day Hisoka was crushed by Tsuzukis exuberant hug. So many emotions where pouring into him, it was hard to distinguish them. The dominant one, the brightest however was the love he felt.

Hisoka felt lips press against his. He would have recoiled from the intensity if he had not felt the underlying need for reassurance Tsuzuki was feeling. He allowed his lips to soften under the onslaught and was pleased when Tsuzuki's kiss became less frantic and more gentle. Exploring instead of plundering.

A warm wet tongue traced Hisokas lips asking for entrance. Hisoka eagerly opened his mouth and sighed. He jumped a little when he felt one of Tsuzukis hand wander lower but relaxed when it rested on his waist.

Tsuzuki released Hisoka lips and trailed small kisses from the corner of his mouth to the little shell like ear. Hisoka unaccustomed to such a lien feelings and touches only tightened his hold on Tsuzukis shoulders.

When he felt soft nips on his neck, Hisoka moaned low in his throat and tilted his head to the side granting easier access to Tsuzuki and those drugging feelings. Passion and desire overruled his senses taking control.

Hisoka shyly ran his hands under Tsuzukis shirt to touch the warm firm skin beneath. He quickly snatched his hands back when Tsuzuki groaned. Leaning away from the wicked kisses Hisoka looked to Tsuzuki concern mingling with desire.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked shakily. Tsuzuki smiled reassuringly "No, it just felt so good." When he saw Hisoka doubtful look his smile widened, leaning closer he sealed his mouth over the pink swollen ones but not before whispering "Let me show you."

This time Hisoka did not wait for Tsuzuki to ask but parted his lips welcomingly and eagerly participated in the dual between tongues. He couldn't help but groan and arch back when he felt slightly rough hands run along his smooth sensitive back.

Hisoka concentrated on the tantalizing feeling Tsuzukis hands and mouth created over his body. So lost in his pleasure he was unaware he had been lifted and placed on Tsuzukis lap. He became aware of his intimate position when he felt cool air against his skin. Looking down he stared dumbly at the black shirt bunched under his arms.

In a swift move Tsuzuki took the shirt off and tossed it over the couch. Hisoka blinked and crossed his arms embarrassed and shy with a little shriek "Tsuzuki!"

The man in question only chuckled and pulled the rosy colored boy closer to him. Tsuzuki began worrying the delicate skin at the juncture of Hisokas shoulders and ran gentle soothing hands over Hisoka now bare arms. Slowly Hisokas arms fell limply to the side as his head lolled back, the passionate haze overriding the embarrassment.

He gave a startled cry when he felt Tsuzukis hands ghosting over his chest. The cry quickly turned to ragged breathing when he felt those wicked hands zero in on his rosy nipples.

Hisoka gripped Tsuzukis arms for support when lightning sizzled through his blood. Tsuzuki alternated between delivering sharp nips to the perfect smooth flesh before him and smoothing it with his tongue. Mean while one hand was used to support Hisoka back, so he would not topple over and the other to torture the twin nubs on Hisoka chest.

Alternating between rolling it between his thumb and forefinger and pinching it to the brink of being painful. Tsuzuki marveled at the perfection before him. Hisoka hands clenching and unclenching on his arms, his back arching and twisting, gods he was beautiful.

Tsuzuki began to gently lower the boy back onto the couch wanting free use of both his hands. When he had Hisoka securely placed beneath him he ran his hands down Hisoka side delighting in the shivers that caused the smaller form beneath him.

Trailing open mouth kisses slowly down Hisoka chest his hands continued to run up and down Hisoka sides lesuriously. Hisoka buried his hands in Tsuzukis hair searching for an anchor in the storm of pleasure.

It wasn't until he felt hands at the clasp of his jeans that he resurfaced abruptly. He began to tremble but this time it was not from desire.

"Tsuzuki wait! Wait, stop please!" he begged as he tugged on the fistful of hair he had. He began to panic twisting his body trying to get away from the weight that had him pinned.

Tsuzuki sat up looking concerned, his lips swollen and hair disheveled. His heart ached when Hisoka scrambled into a sitting position and he scooted back. "I'm sorry Hisoka, did I do something wrong? Did I scare you, love?" he asked tentivley.

Hisoka looked up to see Tsuzuki sitting on the far corner of the couch. His hair badly disheveled from his hands, his lips red and swollen. His white shirt was in disarray half the buttons undone and falling of one shoulder. When he braved a look into the amethyst eyes he loved he saw desire in them.

But the concern and undertone of fear made him turn his head in shame. He had been so happy, feeling his own pleasure and Tsuzukis and then he had pulled away, scared. Tsuzuki must think him a tease.

He jumped when a gentle hand settled on his shoulder. "Hisoka?" Tsuzuki asked quietly. Hisoka opened his mouth but no words came out. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back in frustration.

He felt Tsuzuki preparing to speak but held up a hand. Slowly opening his eyes he answered in a quivering voice "I'm sorry. I didn't meant to...I… it's just…I'm sorry" he ended up saying, hanging his head and allowing his bland hair to cover his burning cheeks.

Tsuzuki lifted Hisokas head with a gentle yet firm hand under the boys quivering chin. "Too much too soon?" he asked gently. Hisoka nodded shamefully. He was startled when he was pulled into a warm hug. Warm breath stirred his hair as Tsuzuki spoke

"It's fine Hisoka. We don't have to do anything you don't want to. We have eternity to figure out what we want." He reassured the boy. Tsuzuki smiled when he felt the younger man snuggle into his embrace.

"You're not mad, that I can't ….you know" he heard Hisoka ask timidly. Tsuzuki pulled Hisoka back so he could see the green eyes that guarded his sleep and his heart.

"Hisoka, I love you for you. We will take this as slow or as fast as you are comfortable. I can wait until you are ready."

"And if I'm never ready? If I can't do …it?" Hisoka asked almost angrily. Tsuzuki only heard the fear and insecurity.

"Then I will be happy with just holding and kissing you." He replied easily with no hesitation. Hisokas startled gaze flew to Tsuzukis face. He searched the depth of the amethyst pools as well as his feelings.

Hisoka could feel and see the truth in Tsuzukis words. He really would wait for eternity and even if it never happened.

It was then that Tsuzuki saw the most amazing and beautiful thing in his life.

Hisoka smiled; love and acceptance shone brightly in his brilliant emerald eyes.

And in that moment he felt his soul break through the dark chains that had suffocated him for so long, instead reaching out and embracing the warm light emanating from his beloved.

They fell asleep holding on to each other identical smiles on their faces. Their hearts minds and souls merged as one.

**I'm thinking of posting this chapter as a one-shot. Mind giving me a review telling if I should or shouldn't with your reasons please!**

Ok ok I confess I'm just fishing for reviews but I really am thinking about making it a oneshot.


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you all for all the wonderful reviews. I'm glad you guys enjoyed that chapter as it was what started this whole fanfic.**

IMPORTANT NOTE READ FIRST!!!!  
This chapter contains snippets of particular events during a course of time. What I mean is months will have passed after Tsuzuki and Hisoka as well as Watari and Tatsumi have gotten together. And time in between. If you are still confused after this leave me a review and I'll be sure to answer any questions.

**Please enjoy and I hope you leave a review.**

The changes in the Shokan Division where subtle but not unnoticed.

Pays where still docked by a forever formidable and stingy slave driver, otherwise know as Tatsumi. Constant explosions and mutant objects and co-workers by yours truly, Watari.

But now Watari's smiles were more genuine. His laughter and sparkling eyes truly reflecting the joy within, spilling over to wrap around those near him like rays of light.

Tatsumi was still as controlled and efficient as ever but sometimes, if they where quick enough they could detect a slight softening of his features and a ghost of a smile when his gaze landed on a certain beam of sunlight.

When wandering near the favorite partner's office one still had to duck from random flying objects thrown by a ranting and blushing Hisoka. His ever childish partner never ceased to tease, slack off or beg for sweets.

Hisoka was still reserved and never failed to punish his errant partner but his caustic remarks had mellowed down to sarcastic comments that seemed almost playful. He was often caught sliding Tsuzuki a sweet after he had thoroughly reamed his partner. The haunted look had vanished but a shell of insecurity and weariness remained. Now and then a glimmer of happiness and playfulness would peek thru, making who ever witnessed such a rare joy feel invigorated and protective of the eternal youth.

The bundle of joy that was know as Tsuzuki begged for sweets ran off at every opportunity and never failed to run Hisoka or Tatsumi up a wall. Not to mention fight with Terazuma and be banned from certain areas of the department, mainly the library.

However something was different about him, as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders, his laughter and smiles where…brighter. Tatsumi had nearly died a second time of cardio arrest when he had spotted Tsuzuki with a pencil in his hand writing one of his reports; Tsuzuki being efficient with no bribery and no apparent bodily harm.

Tatsumi and Watari now lived together in Tatsumi's apartment. Being practical Tatsumi pointed all the benefits they would gain from it only to be interrupted by his lovers' laughter

"If you want to me to live with you all you have to do is ask."

Tatsumi had smiled something only Watari was honored to, and simply asked "Move in with me Watari?"

Watari smiled and leaned up to press his lips to Tatsumi's in a warm kiss "I would love to"

Tsuzuki and Hisoka where a different story; as neither of them had ever had past commitments to this extent or of this importance they where more hesitant. They where toeing a line where they where comfortable and living together was something they had not approached as of yet.

They spent nights at each others apartments but nothing ever went past beyond sleeping. Things where progressing smoothly and slowly for the most part.

Tsuzuki was taking his time in introducing Hisoka to intimacy, not wanting to dredge up old memories and fears. Tsuzuki was pleasantly surprised at how readily and enthusiastic Hisoka reacted to his ministrations.

Tsuzuki enjoyed showing Hisoka the different ways there where to communicate love. Sometimes he would pop in on Hisoka and ask if he would like to take a walk. One specific time Tsuzuki took Hisoka to see a botanic garden.

Little things like holding hands, hugging or a quick peck in public where Tsuzuki methods of introducing Hisoka to affection outside of their apartments. Long walks, a day at a library, silly things that always managed to fill Hsioka with warmth.

If Tsuzuki didn't manage to irritate him by spinning him around in public or whine like a child about wanting the 'pretty pony cookie'

Over the past moths they had learned their partners erogenous zones and what each preferred, their night spent together often ended up with some heavy petting but never transgressed past that as Tsuzuki sensed Hisoka was not ready for more.

Tsuzuki especially loved two specific 'moods'. When Hisoka took control of their foreplay and was the aggressor. The first time had been a shock not only to see his often shy lover so bold but aggressive as well. (1)

They had been making out on Tsuzukis couch when he suddenly found himself on his back with a very forceful and passionate Hisoka over him. Looking up he saw a spark of something in the teens green eyes that sent a forceful wave of lust to his gut. Next thing he knew his shirt had been ripped open button flying everywhere and his tender nipples being attacked by sharp teeth and a warm wet tongue.

All he could do was lie there and arch and twist his back allowing Hisoka full reign. It wasn't until Tsuzuki clasped Hisoka firm rear end and pull him down to grind their erections together that Hisoka snapped out of it.

It had taken Tsuzki and hour to calm his partner down and get him to unlock the bedroom door and another hour to convince him that he had indeed liked it. It had happened a few more times but for the most part it was Tsuzuki who led.

His other favorite mood was what Tsuzuki called the kitty session. It happened often and it never failed to comfort both. Hisoka would snuggle up to Tsuzuki and they would sit or lie there saying nothing just enjoying their time together. Although sometimes it got awkward.

It always warmed Tsuzukis heart to feel their heart beats synchronized or when Hisoka ran his hand trough his hair until they fell asleep.

Hisoka would always curl up next to him and stroke his arm gently, his side, or do something tender. It was his way of saying "Thank you for waiting." and "I love you" as well as "I'm so glad you are here." It conveyed many emotions that they both felt.

This side however was only for Tsuzukis eyes, as soon as they where in public Hisoka would retreat a little but not enough completely disappear. It wasn't as if he was ashamed of their relationship but it was new and exciting, he didn't need comments that he knew would make him self conscious. However if anyone asked or found out he would not deny it instead stand tall next to his partner, proud and happy of what they had together.

There where only five people that knew of these memorable and life… death altering events and they where the couples themselves and their guardian angel who had no qualms of picking up the nearest sharp or heavy object and bashing it over the rocks they passed of as heads.

The newest addition to the department was trouble and happiness in itself.

After the fight with Muraki it was unanimously agreed that Yoru would be at the office or with one of the couple at all times. They had no clue as to what had transpired between the psychopath and the young girl but knowing Muraki it was nothing good.

Over the next three months things where beginning to shake up. The christening of Yoru into the department came in form of two sweet if demonic girls.

It was a week after the fight when Yoru had picked on Hisoka until the young man had ended up in a rather loud verbal fight with the impish girl. Watari's interest had been piqued and he was currently leaning against Hisoka's desk holding his side and wheezing for breath while Tsuzuki was, to no avail, attempting to break the 'fight' up and contain his laughter.

Tatsumi had been doing his rounds as usual when he happened to come across the scene and was now leaning against the door frame thinking of what he should do. He did not have to be an empath to feel the waves of happiness in the room. It was however short lived.

Hisoka's head snapped up, like a wolf sensing prey, or more accurately a prey smelling his hunter. Tatsumi hurried into the room to stand beside his lover before the door was shoved open and the twin like girls stood with identical smiles.

The shinigami's shuddered as one and gave Hisoka a look of sympathy. For his part Hisoka was frantically looking for an exit. Yoru new to the scene had absolutely no idea what threat the sickishly sweet girls possessed.

A gasp and squeal drew the attention of the huddled group. They looked over to see Saya and Yuma's gaze transfixed on the black clad girl. Yoru had on a red tank top with a black mesh shirt over it, black skin tight pants with black buckle boots and a silver studded choker with matching wrist band and belt. Her hair was tied back with leather that wrapped halfway down her hair showing of her silver wing earrings.

Yoru had a bad feeling this was not going to turn out well. Her suspicions where confirmed when she saw the calculating gleam in the girls ayes and a scary smile bloom. In a synchronized move they brought out two pink ribbony and fluffy baby doll dresses.

"Hisoka where did you find her? She has a gorgeous sense of fashion!" cried one of the girls

"Yes, and she's almost as pretty as you are! And look at those beautiful wings! They will be perfect with this dress!" cried the other one.

Yoru turned with a disbelieving look that was met by pure sympathy from the three older men and panic from the blond. Hisoka grabbed her hand ran behind his desk pulling Yoru with him just in time to avoid a flying tackle from the girls.

Hisoka began dragging a shocked Yoru to the door only to be intercepted by Yuma, with something close to a whimper Hisoka back peddled and searched for an exit calling out pitifully for the men to help them.

"You have got to be kidding me!?" cried Yoru when Hisoka got tackled. She watched in fascinated disbelief as Hisoka fought like a cornered tiger and the girls mulishly holding on to him attempting to remove his clothes.

"I am not wearing that piece of shit again!" Hisoka screamed.

Yoru let out something that could only be described as a squeal when she was dragged to the floor by surprisingly strong hands. Looking up she saw who she assumed was Yuma. Panic set in and she acted on instinct.

Drawing her feet up she wedged them between her body and the eager girls and pushed up with all her might. Yuma flew over her head to crash on her back on the floor the dress falling over her face.

There was a minute of absolute silence and that was all the time Yoru needed. Jumping to her feet she reached over and yanked Saya up by her shirt and tossed her over Yuma. Hisoka quickly took the hand that was offered to him and the teens backed away as fast as they could pulling their shirts back down.

Saya and Yuma stood up slowly the way the dead do in a horror movie and slowly advanced on the panicking pair.

Watari, Tsuzuki and Tatsumi where holding perfectly still hoping they had been forgotten and by the looks of it they had. Now all the men had to do was contain their laughter to avoid bodily harm. A broken rib or two from suppressing laughter was better than educing the wrath of two empaths.

Hisoka and Yoru ran behind the desk trying to put as many obstacles as they could between themselves and the little she-devils. "What the hell is wrong with them?" she asked angrily.

The girls just laughed and began closing in on them one from each side holding the hideous dresses up to torment their victims.

"Hisoka do you trust me?" Yoru suddenly asked. Hisoka never took his eyes of Saya as he answered "Why?"

"I have a plan but you have to trust me in order for this to work. Besides who would you rather face, me or them."

Hisoka did not even have to think about it. "What do you want me to do?" he asked panicked as the girls where closing in on them.

"Wrap your arms around my neck and don't let go!" she said.

"WHAT?!" he cried out turning to look at her. Everyone in the room mirrored the boys facial expression. Yoru backed up and pulled an unresisting Hisoka with her.

"Just do it" she cried as the girls leaped for them. In that split second Hisoka threw himself against Yoru and eepd.

Yoru wrapped her arms around Hisokas waist and fell backwards thru the windows that gave easily to their weight. Everyone ran to the window calling the teens names panicked.

Hisoka was clinging to Yoru and trying to twist his body to take the brunt of the impact cursing the girl every second as they fell. He felt Yoru shaking and he felt laughter through their link

"Relax" she said mirth clear in her voice. Three feet from the concrete she turned and spread her wings taking them up. The group near the window slumped in relief as they saw they where safe.

Tsuzuki, Watari, Yuma and Saya waved cheerily with grins while Tatsumi looked on disapprovingly. Yoru flew higher and headed fro the cherry tree's and shuddered when she heard the girls yelling after them;

"Don't worry we have plenty more dresses and an eternity to try!"

That had been a memorable experience and the ones that followed had been no less drastic or amusing. Yuma and Saya had vowed to dress them up and they attempted to re-dress the frightened youths at every chance they got. One way or another Hisoka or Yoru would come up with a plan and manage to escape much to the girls regret and their co-workers amusement.

Another change in the Shokan Division, one more shocking and un-foretold dealt with none other than Terazuma.

Two weeks after the Yuma and Saya christening, Tsuzuki got into a fight with Terazuma over Hisoka. The exact details where sketchy but a supposable insult, more like secret, had been uttered and naturally they had to go for each others throat.

Yoru happened to get caught within firing range and was swept into the battle.

Too bad for the two men that no more than five minutes ago she had been molested by one of Wataris brilliant inventions _after _she had managed to escape the clutches of the 'terrible twins', as she dubbed them.

As she passed between the bloodthirsty fighters she summoned her powers and a violent gust of wind knocked the two combatants across the room, opposite each other.

Tsuzuki knowing full well the young woman's temper stayed wisely cowed on the floor until the immediate danger passed.

'_Besides' _he thought smugly with a secretive smile _'he is about to find out why we call her NekoYasha.' _Tsuzuki angled himself for a better view ignoring his friends as they joined him, well all except for Hisoka as he leaned against his boyfriends' leg.

Terazuma had heard of the girl but had never actually met her. And now here stood a pint size girl with a chip on her shoulder the size of his fist. He had never been a sociable person, tolerable at best. To say he was irritated would be an understatement. Making a pithy comment he prepared to step on the girl and forget about her when she talked back.

Intrigued Terazuma gave her one of his best glares and shot a scathing remark that would send anyone running. That was anyone who wasn't Yoru.

Yoru gave as good as she got, standing toe to toe with him, despite the fact that she had to look up to maintain eye contact.

The onlookers stared in awe as a match better than the ones between Terazuma and Tsuzuki. This girl was half his size and probably three times younger than him but here she stood toe to toe with the official bad ass of the department and gave as good as she got.

They could only stare as the two intellectuals glared and tried to outdo each other.

They where unaware of how long the match lasted but it was long enough to get a crowd and pool started.

"You know what is the scariest part?" asked Hisoka to no one in particular. He did not wait for an answer "They are actually enjoying this. They're having…fun."

After that Terazuma or Yoru made it a point to meet at least twice a week. One day to test their wit against each other and the other to compete in archery after they discovered it was a hobby they shared. Of course it ended up in competition but it was a stress reliever for Terazuma.

Something Wakaba and Tatsumi appreciated. Wakaba had even made a point to meet the infamous girl and enjoyed her company as much as Terazuma although in a much different way. They found their fun in running Terazuma up a wall.

Everything was going nearly perfect…too perfect.

Watari had noticed something he was concerned about but never mentioned. Instead he did what he was best at, observe and form conclusions later to be tested.

In this case it unfortunately concerned someone he considered a good friend.

He began to be concerned and be suspicious when Yoru would disappear for an hour or two with no one knowing where she went. At first he had dismissed it as everyone else as her empathic abilities needing a rest but the afternoon after Saya and Yuma his opinions had quickly changed.

After the teens had returned to the office Tatsumi had felt obligated to lecture the errant escapes in their unethical conduct and what not. Hisoka looked properly chastised although he couldn't quite hide the glimmer of happiness and excitement at doing something so unlikely and the rush of the flight had been nearly indescribable to someone who had always been tied to earth with heavy chains of contempt and pain.

Yoru was a different story. Although to a non observer she looked only impish Watari noted the unusual pale complexion and slightly labored breathing. Concerned he had wanted a moment with her but she disappeared.

Next time he saw her she looked fit as a fiddle but Watari was not convinced. He decided to keep an eye on her and what he discovered worried him more and more.

After her…entertainment with Terazuma that faithful afternoon he had noticed Yoru missing. When he went to look for her he found her leaning against a wall and breathing heavily clutching her stomach. Before he could approach she staggered off around the corner and he was unable to follow as Tatsumi decided that was enough fun and threatened to dock every ones pay if they did not return to their places in less than three minutes.

Any time Yoru used her unusual powers or overexerted herself in any way she would end up pale and shaky her breath labored a fine sheen of sweat. In an effort to keep a better eye on her or find the cause of these unusual symptoms Watari ended up inviting Yoru to his lab.

In turned out to be more than beneficial for him.

Yoru had a quick and bright mind when it came to science. She said it came from being a lab rat for all of her life. For what ever reason Yoru was happy to be there, it turned out she had missed the complexities and thrills that where found in a lab.

She was not a genius or anything but she did have an understanding and passion for enigmas. The unlikely pair could spend hours on end in a project with Yoru sometimes voicing out ideas or suggestions but more often than not a silent observer as well as support for Watari.

Another month passes after the incident after Watari found her against the wall after her battle with Terazuma that the subject of her health came up. This time however there was no turning a blind eye for any of them.

Watari and Tatsumi had joined Tsuzuki, Hisoka and Yoru in the young couple's office and had been talking about getting together for lunch, something Watari and Tsuzuki liked to call a double date when Yoru collapsed.

Yoru had been laughing along with the golden beam and the hyper puppy when she suddenly doubled over and fell to her knees. Her curse marks began to glow and she began to vomit violently. After her stomach emptied she had the dry heaves and her whole body was shaking, a small trickle of blood ran down the corner of her mouth.

Hisoka's own curse mark had begun to glow dully but nothing strong, they where just making themselves known.

The young woman collapsed after a feat of coughing onto her side where she laid still as death.

Panicked they took her to the infirmary to run test.

A cold feeling of dread gripping them all.

Muraki was back and his goal; Yoru.

**(1) It will become clear in the next chapters how and why Hisoka managed to get..ahem aggressive.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you Trans and MYSOU for your unfailing reviews. **

**MYSOU I hope you enjoy this little treat I put in for you. Trans yours will come next **

**Unfortunately I seem to have stumbled into a writers block. These next chapters may not be up to par but I hope you leave a review none the less.**

**Disclaimer: The song is Cold by Crossfade and obviously not owned by me and neither is YnM.**

When Yoru awoke next she knew there would be no more evasions or half truths.

She looked into the eyes of each man that formed a semi-circle around her and saw determination, they would not give in or give up in their pursuit for answers. That did not bother her.

No, what bothered her was the underline of fear and hurt. They attempted to hide everything with their shield and it worked for the most part but Yoru could see it all in their eyes and it made her feel ashamed and small.

Making these people, people she considered friends worry and doubt when they gave her nothing but acceptance and friendship. But there was no going back and most of the guilt came from knowing if she could do it all over again she would not change a damn thing she had done.

Slowly she sat up and calmly asked "What do you want to know?"

Watari exploded out of his chair "How the hell can you do that? How can you sit there and ask us what we want to know as if you where just discussing the weather when you..your…" he trailed off slumping into his chair as fast as he had erupted.

"I'm dying and there is nothing anyone can do about it." she said quietly.

Tears swam in Hisoka's eyes as well as Watari's but they would not let them fall. Tatsumi remained unmoved, except for the tightening of his mouth. And Tsuzuki, well she couldn't be sure his shields where as strong as Tatsumi's and his hair was covering his eyes.

He suddenly rose and sat a few inches away from Yoru. He took her hand between both of his and looked up. His eyes shone with unshed tears, fear and hope warred within his beautiful amethyst eyes.

He said one word, one word that shattered part of Yoru's heart. "No"

Tears rushed to Yoru's blue eyes "Malak, my cancer is back. The science is not developed far enough to find a cure and besides it's not regular cancer. It's mixed with black magick."

Tsuzuki shook his head over and over again "No you can't, you won't. It can't touch you again besides Watari can help, right?" he asked turning to the shuddering man.

Yoru placed a small cool hand against Tsuzuki's cheek forcing him to look at her, away from the grieving man "It's not fair Tsuzuki, too put pressure on him. Since I already died there is a chance I won't die again but you have to understand this was not your fault, none of yours."

"How long?" asked Watari his voice hoarse.

"Since the day we confronted Muraki. He brought it back as a lesson of my defiance to him." She answered truthfully. She wasn't prepared for Watari's next move.

"Why didn't you tell us? Tell me? I could have helped I saw you, I recognized something was wrong but I didn't do anything." He began blaming himself.

Tatsumi yanked on the hysterical mans hand until Watri fell on his lap where he was held tightly. Yoru closed her eyes and leaned back against the pillows.

"I didn't let you see and if I could do it again I would do the same exact thing."

This time it was Hisoka who spoke never leaving his chair his eyes trained on the floor.

"You can't do this to me, to us." He looked up and his eyes where full of pain and panic. Jumping to his feet he shouted "You did this to me! You forced me to open up again you forced me to feel and now you're going to leave like everyone else."

"You're nothing but a hypocrite! You tell us to fight, to stand up for what we believe and here you are giving up with out even trying."

Hisoka turned his back to Yoru unable to bear the sight of one of the strongest people lying looking helpless and fragile.

"Or is it that we are not important enough for you to fight for?"

Before anyone could say or do anything Hisoka dashed out not turning when he heard his name being called. He had to run, run from the pain and memories. A small part of him knew Tsuzuki would come for him until then he would continue to run.

Tsuzuki had sprung to his feet when Hisoka had dashed out but followed at a much slower pace. He had begun to understand Hisoka better these last few months, the way he thought, how he reacted to certain situation or comments and at the moment Tsuzuki knew Hisoka needed some time to collect himself.

"He's right you know" Tsuzuki said quietly from the door "It's not fair for you to push this upon us and suddenly pull back but." He trailed of before squaring his shoulders but still not facing Yoru "I understand why you did what you did and I can't blame you. Honestly none of us can as we've done it at least once but that doesn't stop the hurt."

Yoru closed her eyes and leaned back against the pillows not able to face the men she had come to love in such a short time, not when their pain was like sharp shards in her heart.

Opening her eyes she caught Tatsumis cool assessing eyes and pleaded with him to take the silently grieving man somewhere where he could be consoled. Tatsumi stared at her for a long time before silently standing up and carrying Watari out with out another word.

Yoru leaned back against the pillows and let the hot tears run their course silently crying out for her stability and friend.

-.o.0.o-

Tsuzuki found Hisoka in one of the teens favorite spots. Hisoka often went deep into the cherry tree groove to climb on branch and think or nap if he could.

Hisoka was leaning against the tree trunk looking up at the sky and did not acknowledge Tsuzukis presence. The older man took this as a sign that Hisoka was not ready to talk yet.

Tsuzuki sat directly underneath Hisoka's branch, using the trunk of the tree as a back supporter and rested his clasped his hands loosely around his upraised knees.

"What I told Yoru wasn't really the truth" Hisoka said softly after a few minutes of silence. " She wasn't the one that forced me to feel, to care. It was you."

Tsuzuki said nothing; he just waited patiently for Hisoka to continue. "Its' just…"

Hisoka hesitated "I'm scared Tsuzuki"

Amethyst eyes looked up in shock. Standing he reached for the blond man and waited until thin arms reached down for him. Tsuzuki pulled Hisoka down like a child cradling him against his chest as he sat down on the floor.

Hisoka curled up against Tsuzuki taking in his partners warmth and soothing scent. "What are you afraid of Hisoka?"

Hisoka burrowed in closer still and took a shuddering breath. "These…feelings, they are so strong. Sometimes it feels like they will burst out of me and I can't control them."

Tsuzuki was confused. He had his shields up and most everybody had developed strong shields in order to protect the youngest co-worker so why..

"Baka" came the muffled insult. Though Tsuzuki knew it had turned more into a term of affection from the standoffish teen.

"What I …feel…for you…towards you.." Hisoka stumbled over what he wanted to say "it's just so ...overwhelming." he finished lamely. Hisoka began to twirl one of the buttons in Tsuzuki's shirt when the silence between them lengthened.

Tsuzuki held Hisoka close while he contemplated Hisoka's admission. He did not want his feelings to be a burden to Hisoka but bottling them up hadn't helped him either.

Besides he did not think the blond was chastising him or rejecting him. His heart lightened as he realized it was exactly what Hisoka had said.

He was overwhelmed with all the new feelings, things he had never dealt with before only longed for. Now that he had them he was afraid of what they did to him, what would happen.

Tsuzuki placed a gentle hand under the fidgeting boys chin and raised it gently until reluctant green eyes met his. Smiling Tsuzuki leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss on the boys lips, demanding nothing but giving everything.

"It will be alright Hisoka, I promise."

Hisoka eyes began to glisten with the rising tears and his voice trembled "You can't promise me that Tsuzuki. We don't know what is going to happen to you, to me. What if Muraki…"

Again Tsuzuki kissed him, silencing the escalating panic. "I do know Hisoka because I have you by my side as you have me. Together we can accomplish anything, do you know why?"

Hisoka mutely shook his head as a lone tear escaped. Tsuzuki gently caught it with his thumb.

"Because I believe in us, in you. I rely on your strength, your intelligence but most importantly your love. We each have our strengths and our weaknesses and together with the trust we have between us nothing can come between us, not if you don't let it."

Hisoka was silently crying as Tsuzuki spoke. Everything his love said made sense it filled his weary soul with confidence with warmth, not because they where pretty words or what he needed to hear but because he could hear the ring of truth in them and the total conviction in the amethyst pools that had saved his lost soul years before.

Hisoka gave a watery chuckle before whipping his tears with the sleeve of his shirt. "Who are you and what have you done to my idiot?"

Tsuzuki laughed delightedly and tumbled Hisoka to the flower petals around them. Hisoka gave a little shriek and thumped the overgrown puppy-like man on the head and rolled until he rested on the bigger mans chest.

Hisoka crossed his arms and raised himself to get a better view of his boyfriends face. "I love you Tsuzuki and together we can conquer anything."

Tsuzuki smiled and cupped a hand over Hisoka baby smooth cheek. "Starting with a stubborn hell cat."

Hisoka's smiled dimmed a little but after a gentle swipe of Tsuzuki's thumb restored its light "And then moving into the impossible. Cutting down your addiction to sweets."

Tsuzuki's expression of absolute horror was too much for the youth and he did something he had learned from the man beneath him.

The breeze blew just in time to sweep the affectionate and delightful laughter of a free spirit as battered hearts and souls tumbled among the pink wonderland.

-.o.0.o-

Watari sighed. He was a little embarrassed about his emotional breakdown in the infirmary. It was just…everything was going so perfect…too perfect.

He had Tatsumi now and they where living happily together. Of course that didn't mean they didn't argue on the contrary it seemed they argued more now than they had before they where a couple but they weren't violent or angry arguments.

It was more like playful banters between them, almost like Hisoka and Tsuzuki.

Watari felt a smile tug at the corners of his mouth while thinking about his friends. Now that they had accepted each other feelings things seemed to be progressing smoothly, not that it changed their personalities or anything else. No, it simply made their lives richer, exactly what was happening with himself and Tatsumi.

Thinking about Tatsumi Watari felt his smile bloom, what a sweetheart the cold shadow master really was. He had always known Tatsumi used his frigidness and impeccable sense of duty as a shield for both himself and others but he had caught glimpses of the tenderness that lived behind the walls.

It was what had caught Wataris interest in the first place. He had wanted to understand what caused the man to hide so stealthily only to resurface as an almost totally different being.

And by the gods he had and he couldn't be happier.

His lover was currently getting him something cool to drink after he had tenderly cradled him against his chest and brought him into his sanctuary that was masqueraded as a torture chamber to other workers, otherwise know as his office.

Watari was sitting on Tatsumi's chair, which was sinfully comfortable, and opening random drawers. He was never one to sit idly, not even when his mind and heart where heavy.

He was currently opening the top drawer to his left, having started from bottom to top, when something caught the scientist eye. Lifting the object he gasped.

It was the ribbon he had been wearing the day they had first kissed. Watari was touched. He was going to place it back when he saw what the ribbon had been lying over.

It was a white envelope, nothing strange about that but it was the color paper that peeked out of the plain envelope, it was a light gold. Watari knew it was definitely not related to work, Tatsumi would never waste such 'frivolous' paper on something that was related to work.

He looked around the empty room and picked up the envelope hesitantly, this was private and although they where a couple now that did not give him the right to snoop around his boyfriends things.

Unfortunately for him, his curiosity would not let him put it down. Taking the paper out he promised himself he would just skim trough it and put it back where it belonged. Nodding he opened the letter and read the first line and his resolution flew out the window.

**The light to my shadow, I do not know if I will ever be able to express what I really feel, but I also can not keep it a secret. In case I can not, much to my regret, tell you this in person perhaps I will take the cowards way out and tell you in this letter. I have never been able to express my emotions to others or even myself but I hope you can decipher what my confused mind and aching heart are trying to convey.**

**Looking back at me I see that I never really got it right.**

**I never stopped to think of you; I'm always wrapped up in things I can not wield.**

**You are the antidote that gets me by **

**Something strong like a drug that gets me High**

**What I really meant to say is**

**I'm sorry for the way I am**

**Never meant to be so cold, never meant to be so cold**

**What I really meant to say is I'm sorry for the way I am**

**Never meant to be so cold to you**

**I'm sorry 'bout all the lies**

**Maybe in a different light you can see me stand on my own again**

'**Cause now I can see**

**You are the antidote that got me by**

**Something strong like a drug that got me high**

**What I really meant to say is**

**I'm sorry for the way I am**

**I never meant to be so cold, never meant to be so cold**

**What I really meant to say is sorry for the way I am**

**Never meant to be so cold **

**I never really wanted you to see the screwed up side of me that I keep**

**Locked inside of me so deep; it always seems to get to me**

**I never really wanted you to go so many things you should have known**

**I guess with there is just no out**

**I never meant to be so cold**

Watari sat crying reading and re-reading the letter he was sure would have never made it to his hands. He gasped when cool hands whipped away his tears. Looking up he was instantly lost in a deep blue ocean making his own golden eyes sparkle even brighter with fresh tears.

Tatsumi crouched before the golden man and continued to wipe the tears that refused to stop. He never said those foolish words that never seemed to work, instead he gave his silent support. He knew nothing else.

When Tatsumi realized it would be a while before the scientist pulled himself together he picked the man up and sat down on his chair placing the fragile like bundle on his lap and began stroking the silky golden tresses absentmindedly.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you. I couldn't concentrate on anything. I found myself writing this one day when I couldn't hold it in anymore. I was…"

Tatsumi couldn't finish his sentence; he couldn't say he was afraid he had lost Watari. Instead he tightened his arms around Watari with force enough to crush but Watari did not mind. He simply tightened his arms and snuggled in taking in the calming scent of his boyfriend.

Watari marveled at the contrast, how Tatsumi could think himself so cold and yet here he was holding him tightly like a drowning man might his lifeline. Watari knew it was getting easier for Tatsumi to accept his hugs or any other physical contact.

The hugs where less hesitant and longer than they had been at the beginning of their relationship. Watari was a physical person and often sought affection or reassurance with hugs, light kisses or by simply holding hands.

Tatsumi grew fond of them and even looked forward to them though rarely ever initiating them. But that was one of the may reasons Watari loved him, he was always trying to make things work, willing to go out of his comfort zone to meet him half way.

It was as Yoru said the existed in harmony. Two opposite personalities coexisting together because they accepted each other and learned to lean a little with out loosing themselves.

-.o.0.o-

The two couples meet before the closed doors of the infirmary. Looking at each other they realized they where more relaxed, more in control of their emotions. As one the opened the doors and stepped in ready to battle for or with the young woman who had quickly become part of their unconventional family.

Startled they stopped only within feet of entering. Tsuzuki was the first to make his way to the impeccably made bed. He picked up the folded paper and read it out loud.

Sorry Guys my claustrophobia was acting up and I needed some air and time to think. I'll be at Hisokas place when you are ready to…continue our earlier discussion.

Yoru

P.S I hope you don't mind Sharma.

Tatsumi looked at his watch "There is an hour left before we need to clock out. Why don't we finish what we have to do and then meet at Kurosakis and Tsuzuki's office?" he suggested.

Nodding the group separated with out another work. It was going to be a long hour.

**1 hour later**

Hisoka unlocked his apartment door and stepped back to allow his guest, although not invited by him, into his apartment. The three men filled in quickly and took of their shoes everyone putting them in a neat row, despite the fact that it wasn't Watari's or Tsuzuki's style.

They still remembered the hellion the blond boy could be and they did not want a repeat.

The lights where off and Hisoka began to worry. He did not feel Yoru in the apartment. Quickly rushing past the standing men he went into the living room and turned a light on and sighed in relief when he spotted black wings draped over his couch.

He felt everyone behind him but was grateful when Tsuzuki held them back. They had learned the hard way that Yoru always woke up fighting and if you weren't careful…well it would be them who would be lying down.

Hisoka walked over and put a hand on her shoulder and moved quickly away. A light flashed and Hisoka hissed as a thin red line blossomed in his arm. He blocked Yorus leg and called out to her "Yoru damn it you hell cat calm down."

Tatsumi and Watari could only gawk, although it was only visible in Watari's face. Yoru was sitting on the couch her right leg being held by Hisoka and a wicked looking knife on her left hand. Blinking she smiled sheepishly and tucked the knife in her left boot and put her foot down.

"Sorry" was all she said. Hisoka shrugged it away and nodded his head in the direction of everyone else. She waved wanly before standing up glancing at Hisoka from the corner of her eyes.

At his slight nod she pushed her way past the still men and into the kitchen not bothering to turn on the light as she had memorized the lay out of the tiny apartment.

Hisoka sat on the sofa and Tsuzuki came over sting close enough so their thighs where pressed together. The two standing men shook their head and sat on the chairs opposite the couch. Watari with his natural curiosity looked around the apartment a little disappointed at the emptiness of it.

Just then Yoru came back with a tray, setting it on the table she sat on a cushion and began serving tea saying nothing. Passing one to each member she took a sip and took a calculated look at the people before her.

After a long discussion, or rather chastising, with Byakko she was prepared to explain as best she could.

"I can give you many reasons why I did not tell you, actual facts but they would only be excuses in the end." She began "So let's skip the guilt trip and get down to the facts. I didn't lie to you when I told you bout my life. What I left out only happened recently."

She paused again and looked around. To her left Tsuzuki had Hisoka's hand in his own and although their fingers weren't intertwined she could see Hisokas fingertips curling up to cup Tsuzuki's. On her right hand Watri and Tatsumi where in different chairs not touching, or so it seemed to an untrained eye.

In truth Tatsumi had one of his shadows over Wataris no doubt offering him comfort and strength by surrounding him. Yoru hid her smile by taking a drink form her tea. Good.

"The day we confronted Muraki he did something to release the memories imprisoned in me. I told you how I was captured and when I woke up I was tied to a bed underground it seemed, I'm not quite sure. He tested my powers by brutality and nearly broke me if it where not for Byakkos help."

Before anyone could ask she quickly explained "He couldn't set me free or warn you because he was cut off from me, whether by Muraki or because he was busy. I used the room Byakko helped create in my mind when things where overwhelming and I needed a break."

"I'm not sure how long I was under Muraki's experiments but one day he came in and…" she pointed at the scroll mark on her cheekbone. She saw Hisoka's flinch and tighten his hand around Tsuzuki's.

"Well obviously the process is painful and while I was bleeding he injected me with something, and I'm quite sure it was cancer."

Watari raised a hand and Yoru paused. "I've been wondering, why would he deliberately infect you with cancer? I don't mean to sound callous but wouldn't he need you in full health?"

In truth that was what they had all been wondering. "He would and does but as I've mentioned before this is no ordinary cancer. You see it is infused with magic. My curse mark are like a switch to m y cancer, controlled at his will and it is his way of guarantee my return to him. Or so he believes."

"If I want a cure I must return to him but I'd rather die again. At the moment the cancer is at an early stage and can be treated"

She quickly shook her head when she saw the hope brighten in their eyes. "But it won't do much good if Muraki still controls me. He came for me hours before my death to ensure my body and its powers would still be useful to him."

Hisoka suddenly spoke up "Why you? They way the facts are being laid out and even Murakis own actions point directly to you. Why does he want you so badly."

Yoru turned sad eyes in his direction. Hisoka sucked in a deep breath at the pain and regret he saw in her eyes. "It's not me he wants, not really. He needs and empath someone with abilities because I'm just an experiment, a test if you wish."

Hisoka felt that cold hand grip his insides and squeeze again only this time it was worse much worse and he could tell everyone in the room felt as he did. In a quiet vice that might as well have been a shout Yoru delivered a stunning and heart freezing fact.

"I was merely a test. Who he really wants is you Hisoka."

Yoru felt pride as Hisoka breathed shakily and entwined his fingers with Tsuzuki's . Hisoka hadn't broken down he was scared but not willing to cower.

"Why me?"

"You know I was used to entrance and manipulate humans? Well I used projection for this and ability you have if you wish to learn however a human can only control a human."

Nothing more needed to be said. The room fell into silence, something that had been occurring an awful lot among them and not something they wished to continue nor prolong.

Tsuzuki broke the terrible silence "Is there a way to end this? To set you, both, free?"

Yoru uncharacteristically hesitated. She bit her lip and stared into her cup.

"Well yes but as perfect as it might seem there are sever set backs and consequences to it."

"What is it?" Watari asked with half excitement and half dread.

"I don't know if the curse will reverse or disappear completely but I am sure that it can never be used to manipulate or harm us."

"There are only two solutions. One is for Muraki to set us free and the chances of that are as slim as Terazuma kissing Tsuzuki on his own free will and actually enjoying it, no offense Tsuzuki."

Yoru smiled wanly at green tinge that assaulted Tsuzuki's face and the faint smile on everyone's face.

"The second is to eliminate the source."

**Please Review!**


	12. Chapter 12

**I'm so sorry for not updating faster. I was just stuck and I have my finals in scholl so it's crazy right now.**

This chapter is short but I couldn't help it, I needed to post.  


**  
Special thanks to KikoTag, much appreciated. **

**Please, Please Review !**

Muraki sat behind his immaculate desk staring steadily at the two humans before him. He had anticipated this result as a possibility and he silently congratulated himself. Indeed at times he surprised even himself, of course that was just his modesty speaking. He had always know he was a genius

His attention was brought back when the man before him shifted slightly the only sign of frustration, or was it anticipation? Either way it was of no consequence to him.

"You believe the information you have will be of importance to me and my research?"

It was the woman this time who spoke her eyes glittering faintly with irritation "It was you who sought us out. If you would not have thought so I doubt you would have bothered to contact us." 

Muraki smiled thinly "Forgive me. I am unaccustomed to co-workers, I prefer solitary work. Now on to business, you have the files I requested?"

The black haired woman turned to her companion extending one red manicured hand. The male looked wary and out of sorts for a moment but quickly recovered and handed over a thick briefcase.

Muraki was careful to maintain his anticipation in check keeping his face composed in a professional, almost aloof manner.

"Before we hand this over we need you to sign a few papers." The woman said opening the briefcase and setting down the documents on the desk pushing them in the direction of Muraki. The doctor lifted an eyebrow the only outward sign of irritation.

He took the papers and skimmed trough them only half listening to the woman's prattle.

"We expect the payment you promised us along with the right to work with you in every step of the way. We are partners not your lackeys" she stated firmly.

Murakis face did not change as he signed his name with a flourish. It was of no consequence to him if they believed this to be true. He would discard them as soon as their usefulness was over. Taking the briefcase he followed the mundane rituals of etiquette and shook hands with both scientists.

"Welcome to the team. I'm sure your daughter will be thrilled to see you."

In Meifu Yoru went into a round of sneezes. Thanking everyone after their collective bless you she looked around the room and studied the occupants. She was sitting on her preferred window ledge where she could glide out at will which also had the advantage of overseeing the room.

Yoru was amazed at how easily they adapted to a routine. After that night of enlightenment all five, well four actually, went through a serious of loud arguments over the best course of action that lasted for two weeks, on and off of course.

Yoru had not participated although she knew she was as deeply involved as any of the men. The main reason was because she knew one way or the other she was going to cease existing in this place.

The two weeks of arguments had been over whether they should some how eliminate Muraki and if they did what would be the possible outcomes and how they would be dealt with.

In spite of all the heated argument Yoru had sensed the undercurrent of companionship and loyalty. It was clear that each and every one of them would back up the other no matter the decision, because they were friends, but no even deeper they where a true family.

At times like this was when Yoru felt pathetic and angry at herself. She watched how the four moved synchronized even if they themselves never noticed. Hisoka was at his desl writing a report and Tatsumi was standing over Tsuzuki overlooking and or helping the hyper active man with his document.

Watari came back in with the copies Hisoka had requested. Nodding in thanks Hisoka went back to his writing and Tatsumi moved over to where Hisoka was trading places with Watari but not before brushing his hand against Wataris as he passed him by in a silent nearly invisible gesture.

Watari sat next to Tsuzuki and immediately they began to talk and laugh the other two ignoring the going on and pouring over the papers. When Tsuzuki began to whine that he was hungry Hisoka with out breaking a stride reached into his drawer and tossed to chocolate bars over.

Yoru felt jealousy at such easy companionship between them. Intellectually she knew they had worked hard for this atmosphere and they weren't with out their draw backs but she couldn't help but feel some resentment as it brought back her own loneliness.

She felt guilty for having these feelings and thoughts which in turn made her angry then ashamed at the anger and angry all over again. It was a short vicious circle she couldn't shake off no matter her outer appearance.

It's not that the men excluded her, no they welcomed her but that did not take the loneliness or emptiness when she saw the tender looks the couples exchanged or the genuine delight that lighted their eyes when they where together like brothers. It brought back her own painful past and yawning emptiness into sharp focus.

Yoru looked up to find Hisoka looking at her intently a strange look on his face. Smiling wanly she waved and let herself fall back out the window, running from the beautiful and untouchable scene as well as the demons within her.

She was probably sending out negative waves and Hisoka picked up on them. It was better if she did what she always did, what she was born to do. Watch from afar, always alone. It was what her parent's taught her, what life taught her.

Hisoka watched worriedly as Yoru flew away. He had felt such intense loneliness

And guilt at first he was scared it was Tsuzuki projecting the feelings as he had so many times in the past, but when he focused on the laughing man he only felt happiness and a bit of worry which was to be expected all things put into consideration. That and the ever present warmth that represented Tsuzuki's love.

Frowning he had traced the feelings and had discovered they where coming from the young woman. He had felt loneliness radiate off Yoru before and was quite understandable. He was sure he had done that many times before but this time it had been so acute he actually felt a piercing in his heart. What worried him even more was the oppressing guilt. He had no idea where that had come from.

Hisoka had always seen Yoru as someone who lived by her own rules an despite her obvious fears stood her ground, something he admired greatly, if secretly. He hadn't actually thought of her as completely vulnerable or susceptible to such feelings.

Stupid of him he knew but there none the less. Tatsumi called his attention back and he made a mental note to try and talk to the girl later on that night. For no they had to work and plan.

However later on never came. Hisoka and Tsuzuki were called to an unexpected job of retrieving the soul of a young woman who had drowned. Feeling low they had decided to retire early and Yoru had agreed an early night was appropriate.

What they failed to notice was a presence nearly undetectable but all too real.

Later that night Hisoka had a terrible nightmare. These haunting memories had been reduced considerably since he accepted Tsuzuki as a sleeping partner, if a bit reluctantly at first. The hellish memories doubling as nightmares had not vanished nor diminished in their intensity in the least.

The moon was full in Meifu and as always it brought back memories of torture for the youngest members. However tonight was different. Tonight when Yoru awoke screaming and looked out the window the moon was not its pure white, not it was blood red.

Frightened she ran like the scared child she felt within to Hisoka and Tsuzuki's room wanting to find solace , reassurance but most of all comfort and safety. Barging in she stopped frozen in place.

There on Hisokas bed, instead of seeing the sleeping forms she saw the source of her torment sitting comfortably on the bed a beckoning smile and a crocked finger aimed in her direction.

"No! This isn't real. You can't be here."

Muraki laughed and stood with the fluidness of the ruthless predator he was. "My dear forsaken child, of course I am real. I told you I am always with you"

A cold hand touched her skin making her flinch but unable to turn away. She whimpered lightly when the cold menacing hand slid away down to her shoulder only to be replaced with a repulsive cheek as Muraki leaned down.

"I am forever a part of you. Blood of my blood."

Yoru jerked away a cry of denial erupting form her throat. "No it can't be. You aren't real!" she nearly pleaded.

Smiling with cruel satisfaction Muraki walked back to the bed, sitting down as if he owned the place the way he claimed to own her body and soul.

"I told you it was futile to attempt to defy me. I believe you it was futile to attempt to defy me. I believe you thought yourself superior and those fools believed it as well. Pretty words, but empty all the same. I should punish for such blatant disobedience but your inept mistakes are proving to be to my advantage."

Yoru was trembling; every fiber in her being screaming at her to turn away, that this was a dream. Fear paralyzed her, her mind's commands overcome by the stark and overwhelming fear.

"You can't touch them. Can't hurt them or me." She chocked out.

Muraki smiled. "Oh can't I? Would you like for me to remind you just how much I can hurt you? How you are helpless?"

Yoru whimpered and stumbled back but by then it was too late. Muraki's shadow loomed over her and malicious laughter filled her ears. Screaming out for help Yoru was overcome by the shadows her screaming please swallowed up in the darkness that wrapped around her mind.

"You parents are waiting eagerly to see their little girl all grown up. They send a message. Hurry back home."

Where the last words Yoru heard before she knew no more.


	13. Chapter 13

**Again I apologize for the long periods in between but I am trying to wrap it up. There will be horrible grammar and spelling mistakes as I tried to post this as quickly as I could so please excuse them (as you have through out the whole fic --) Sorry I know it's also very short.**

**Disclaimer: I am not a wealthy Manga writer so, not mine.**

**Please leave a review.**

Hisoka and Tsuzuki burst thru the door fear in their eyes even as they swept the tiny living room lit by the bright clear full moon. Walking on shaky legs they made their way to the crouched and trembling girl in the corner.

Kneeling they simultaneously reached for her, Yoru jerked and looked at them tears streaming down her face or at least the reflection of them as her face was in shadows. "Yoru? Yoru what's wrong, honey?" asked Tsuzuki the concern clear in his face.

Yoru shook her head slowly. "Nothing. It was just a stupid dream. Sorry to wake you" she whispered her voice hoarse from all her screaming.

Tsuzuki and Hisoka glanced at each other their worry tripling and then turned back to the girl. Hisoka linked his hand with Tsuzuki in hope that his steady heartbeat and solid emotions would be an anchor in the storm he was about to enter. Cautiously he reached out to Yoru.

Normally he wouldn't do it for multiple reasons. One being he respected people's privacy but mainly he had enough to deal with his own emotions and those thrust upon him let alone _inviting _other emotions

Shocked and more than a little concerned at finding no emotions Hisoka turned to Tsuzuki. Before he could say anything however he was interrupted by Yoru. "Don't worry about it Hisoka. I'm just drained is all, feeling numb."

Hisoka looked doubtful but didn't press the issue. He hated when people did that to him and he could at least respect her wishes. That however did not stop his mind from thinking of possible answers or scenarios nor kept him from feeling concern for the young woman who had quickly become like a sibling to him.

"Would you like to talk about it" Tsuzuki asked hesitantly. He really hated seeing people suffering.

Yoru shook her head. "No thank you. I'll just veg on the couch for a while if you don't mind. It's almost time to go back to work so you might want to catch some sleep."

The men reluctantly retreated when Yoru rose to her feet and stumbled to the couch pulling the blanket around her and flicked the TV on. Her eyes where shadowed and kept disappearing when the channel was turned. Slowly Tsuzuki and Hisoka walked to their bedroom, climbing in Hisoka moved into Tsuzuki's waiting arms.

They lay quietly listening to the murmur of the TV for a while before Hisoka broke the silence. "I'm worried about her."

Tsuzuki held Hisoka closer and nuzzled the top of his head "Why do you say so?"

"Something isn't right. She's ….different. She should be terrified or anything but I can't feel her. It's almost like when we first met her."

Tsuzuki looked to the closed worriedly. "But that's impossible right? Muraki can't control her here. Can he?"

Hisoka shook his head slowly. "I don't know but this feel different. I can feel Yoru there … an underline of fear but it's like she's underwater or something." Hisoka shook his head unable to describe it. "Earlier today she was angry and lonely but she won't talk about it." he confided.

Tsuzuki was worried, this wasn't right. "Maybe it's the stress. I mean a lot of things have been going on and we still don't know if she will react to the medication." He ventured.

Hisoka shrugged and turned over snuggling into the covers, a clear sing that he did not wish to discuss it further. Tsuzuki scooted lower and wrapped his arms around the slighter frame spooning him from behind. After a few minutes Hisoka's hands crept up to wrap around his arm and rest over Tsuzuki's clasped hands against his stomach. Slowly they synchronized their breathing and drifted off.

The next time Hisoka and Tsuzuki woke up it was morning. Stretching Tsuzuki went to take a shower after grabbing his stuff and Hisoka went to make breakfast. Exiting his room he noticed Yoru was gone but that wasn't knew she often flew out first to spend time in the cherry tree grove. Hisoka began to make breakfast almost absentmindedly as he thought of a good way to approach Yoru and try to help. It was the least he could do after her encouragements.

Tsuzuki walked in and gave Hisoka a light peck and pat on the bum to get him moving. Hisoka mock frowned at him and walked out the kitchen trusting Tsuzuki with their breakfast. Well, all the hyper active man had to do was make sure it didn't burn.

Half an hour later the two partners entered the building and headed straight for their office. They had to finish work quickly, at least Tsuzuki did, if they where to have their meeting on time, this time it was surprisingly at Tatsumi's home.

Hisoka looked around for Yoru and frowned when he did not find her. "I'll be right back pup" he called out to Tsuzuki. Walking quickly he made his way to Watari's lab knocking he walked in and had to hold in his laughter. Watari was laying on his desk a hand reaching for the steaming mug just out of his reach.

Walking over he nudged the cup into his friends hand and watched amusedly as Watari took hold of it as if his very life depended on it, as he often sweared it did, and wondered how the cup did not shatter.

"Have you seen Yoru?" Hisoka asked in what he thought was a casual tone. Luckily Watari was still three quarters asleep and his emotions where behind a haze of sleep. Watari mumbled something into his coffee cup as he took a reverent sip.

Collapsing onto his desk he muttered and Hisoka was sure it was more to himself than the youth, "I haven't seen past the back of my eyelids." Hisoka chuckled and was about to leave when he saw Watari shift uncomfortably in his chair before he could ask Watari continued his random unaware speech.

"He's an animal. Insatiable and I will make him pay. He didn't let me sleep and now I can't even sit properly. Beast." He muttered one last time before drowning in his salvation.

Hisoka blushed as he caught an image and he ran out the door. He was torn between wanting to ask more and pretending he never saw that. It had looked very painful and Watari who was much bigger than was complaining and in pain …

He shook his head he needed to find Yoru, everything else could…wait. But it weighed in his heart, knowing that Tsuzuki was trying his best to make everything comfortable and enjoyable for him and yet he could never really return it. He knew Tsuzuki's goal was not only to have sex with him, but it was a part of the life he for saw for them and Hisoka was scared he would be a big disillusion for him.

So intent in his thought he did not see the shadow before him and bumped right into...Tatsumi. Gulping he tried his hardest not to blush and he found to his horror he could not look Tatsumi in the eye. Suddenly finding the floor fascinating he tried to keep the stuttering to minimum

"Good Morning T-Tasumi. Have you seen Yoru?"

Tatsumi frowned wondering what was wrong with Kurosaki-kun this morning. "Actually, yes. She asked if I would inform you that she would be out most of the day and if not you could find her at Wataris lab."

Nodding he muttered a quick thanks and scampered off. His blush was spreading despite his best effort. He would come back later…or maybe not. For the moment he needed to concentrate on his work. Entering his office his previous problems flew out the window and he slammed the door close.

"TSUZUKI! What did I tell you about donut in the office!" A wail and a few thuds later the office resumed its peace…until lunch break that is.

Yoru couldn't understand why she could not get the nightmare out of her head. She knew she was paranoid jumping at every shadow and every sound but she couldn't help it. The worst part was she could not remember all of her nightmare only snippets. Taunting laughter and that last comment…she could and would never face her sires, they where far away from her and she would never go back.

But that did not take the fear away, the dread and disgust. She could not be near Hisoka now, he would feel and maybe even pick up some of the images that kept swirling in her mind like vultures near the dying. It was taking all she had to keep Byakko out and it hurt her to do so but she knew as soon as Byakko got a whiff of trouble or Muraki he would report to Tsuzuki.

Sighing she glided up to Watari's window and knocked on it. It took a few tries as Watari was enraptured in his latest creation and he could not leave the windows unlocked, his fear of 003 flying was groundless but still there. Glancing up distractedly Watari did a double take before jumping to his feet and opening the window.

Yoru flew in and landed gracefully folding her wings behind her. Watari never ceased to get a kick out of it. But today was different there where shadows in her eyes, like when they had first met Bon.

Sitting on his stool he waited for Yoru to settle on her habitual ledge. "Want to tell me what's wrong?" he asked gently but with no push. Yoru shook her head and smiled ruefully.

"Nah, 's just some stupid nightmares."

Watari did not believe her. "Those are some mighty nightmares if they shake you up that bad."

Yoru turned to face him her pale face showing plainly her tiredness and irritation. "I think I know that Watari, but I need some company that won't push me and Tatsumi doesn't have a window." she did not want to sound curt but she was hanging on by her fingernails in a very slippery cliff.

Watari nodded and went back to work. She did not owe them anything and he knew when to respect someone privacy. Despite that he did not attempt to shield his concern for her or the reassurance. Sometimes, he had come to realize, silent support was often more needed than a crying shoulder.

Yoru had successfully avoided Hisoka all day and was now wondering how to do so for tonight. It would be impossible as they would be sitting close together. She chewed on her lower lip as she waited for the men outside. A throbbing began at the base of her skull and was relentless.

She knew she should not go but something was compelling her to go and as she fought an internal battle the pain increased.

By the time she saw the four coming her way the pain was making her see nearly double. She was cursing herself swiftly, she had wanted to avoid Hisoka but not enough for her to want to feel like her head was going to spilt in half.

Hisoka moaned and stopped a good ten feet away from her his hands going to his head. Tsuzuki immediately stopped. Watari rushed forward when Yoru began to fall. Catching her he gasped and picked her up walking quickly back into the building.

Yoru struggled in his arms forcing him to stop or injure her. "I'm fine, I just have a headache."

"The grandmother of all headaches" muttered Hisoka. His head throbbing from the waves Yoru could not contain and frankly was surprised Yoru was coherent.

Yoru didn't have it in her to put up a pretense. "I just need some pain killers and a dark, dark quiet room. And yes this happened before it's called a migraine of which I'm sure all but Tsuzuki have suffered from…unless you count hangovers."

Watari sighed and handed her over to a disgruntled and nearly panicky Tatsumi. Racing ahead he sprinted for the building and his lab where he had some awaiting medication. Yoru had been right of course and he had exactly the thing, as shinigami's really did not feel as a human did, seeing as their bodies could withstand more than humans.

Besides there was a drug he wanted Yoru to try. He had read her medical files and thought he had come up with something that might help ease her pain and slow down the cancer.

Despite her obvious pain Yoru couldn't help but smile lightly at the look on Tatsumi's face. She wiggled a little to try and get down but he tightened his grasp and paled significantly. A low rusty laugh escaped her throat.

"You can put me down you know? It's not vital to my health for you to hold me."

Tatsumi glanced at Kurosaki and Tsuzuki, what on anyone else would have been a pleading and panicking look. Hisoka was leaning heavily against Tsuzuki a good fifteen feet away and Tsuzuki had an arm around Hisoka supporting his smaller frame. He was torn between wanting to help, and laugh, at his old partner and stay beside his boyfriend.

In the end Tatsumi took a deep breath and held fir, "Watari put you here and you will stay here until he comes back." he made it an order.

Yoru wanted to shake her head but only smiled wanly and leaned her head against Tatsumi the light making splinters pulse an angry beat in her head. Tatsumi glanced down and noticed the deep grooves of pain in the young woman's face. His heart stirred slightly at the sight of so much pain in someone so young.

Glancing around he figured his reputation could take one more kind act, after all he was with a ball of sunshine. He raised his shadows protectively over her, effectively cutting of any light and covering Yoru with darkness.

He felt her relax slightly and he sighed in relief. Not long after Watari came running back out his golden hair flying behind him. Seeing Yoru incased in his shadows he smiled, the warmth and brightness of the sunny dimming in comparison.

"I think I'll sit this one out guys." came Yoru's weak voice. "I just want the meds and a comfortable bed. Tsuzuki and Hisoka can fill me in later."

No one argued as they took the fastest route to Hisoka's apartment, teleporting. Arriving there Hisoka beckoned Tatsumi with a hand and turned away blushing furiously as he led them to their bedroom. Hisoka turned down the covers and Watari closed the blinds. Tatsumi looked more relieved than Yoru did when he placed her in the bed.

Murmuring a soft thank you Yoru accepted the glass of water Tsuzuki had brought and with out questioning Watari downed the two pills he handed her. Placing her head on the pillow she closed her eyes and again thanked the group for their kindness.

Before they could leave Yoru couldn't help but ask "Watari, these pills… will I dream?" Wataris hook his head slightly and frowned when she sighed in relief and relaxed letting the drugs do their work, her fight for consciousness too much.

As the group left the room Hisoka sighed in relief and the faint lines of distress began to slowly disappear but the shadows remained. It had disturbed them all to see Yoru lying so helpless, dark circles under too pale skin and pain etched deep into her young face. Not to mention her meek demeanor and lack of spirit.

Yoru heard them leave and despite the pain could clearly feel their concern and hesitation to leave. Not to mention the fear. Yoru felt a curious pain in the region of her heart. Fear took flight in her briefly at the thought of Muraki coming to her in her dreams again this night and complying with his promise. She quickly shook it off, Watari had promised and all she could do was put her faith in him, at the very least she thought she could.

Before she fell into a drug induced sleep she called for her only confident and sanity. It wasn't until she felt the familiar presence in her mind that she allowed herself to let go, but not before locking certain things away from her friend and savior.

This was a burden she had to carry on her own.

Hisoka looked around Tatsumi's elegantly decorated apartment and smiled lightly at the touches of Watari he could see scattered along the room. Sitting down he could feel they wanted to discuss Yoru but the pressing issue was Muraki. As unpleasant as it was it was why they had gathered.

Seeing the utter seriousness in his companions eyes he steeled himself for painful and long discussion.

Muraki, meanwhile, smiled cruelly at the air. So the little doll thought to hide himself from him with her guard dog. '_No matter'_ he thought smugly flipping trough the now familiar files _'soon we will meet again and you will see just how helpless you are, and you will acknowledge your master.'_

Muraki stood and walked out of his office, it was time to check on his newly acquired minions. They where serving his purpose quite nicely. Too bad their expiration date was coming soon.

On his desk pictures of young girl with frightened eyes lay scattered. Ranging in ages and places Yoru's face showed the fear, anger, resentment, and a few times excitement as she performed various task as well as time alone in her small cage.

Yes the time was coming soon, and in the end only one would stand victorious.

**Please Review!!!!!!!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Almost done with the fic. Maybe two or three more chapters left.**

**Kiko, MYSOU, Trans and ****Kaouri18, thank you for your reviews! Hope you enjoy this next chapter.**

Hisoka and Tsuzuki entered their apartment tiredly. It had been a long heated discussion and in the end had gotten them nowhere. Especially since Hisoka's empathy was acting up. He was never going to look at the odd pair the same ever again.

Walking in to his room Hisoka let the back wash of the hall's light fall into the room. Yoru was asleep the lines of distress smoothed in a dreamless sleep. _'Maybe not so dreamless'_ Hisoka thought when he caught a light glow on the base of her neck when she turned away from the annoying light.

Tiredly he walked back his feet dragging and wanting only to be in his love's arms. He found the living room empty but the futon set out. Spotting the light from the kitchen he walked over and smiled lightly. Tsuzuki was making some soothing tea before bed, and by the smell of it, it was Hisoka's favorite.

Turning with two steaming cups, Tsuzuki smiled and held one out. When Hisoka took the cup Tsuzuki clasped Hisokas free hand with his own leading Hisoka back into the living room where they sat side by side drinking.

It was a peaceful moment, one neither of them thought they would ever have had the pleasure of enjoying. The best part was they did not have to say anything to fill the silence. It was enough to simply…be there.

The next two days were miserable and tense. After Yorus dreamless night things began to spiral down once again. Muraki resurfaced like the plague keeping the department, or at least the five occupied. The days where nightmares as they chased dead ends and stood uselessly by as they could do nothing to stop him.

The security for Hisoka and Yoru increased dramatically, the teens being unable to be alone at any time as they never knew when that sneaky bastard would strike again. They knew it was crucial but even at that both being empaths at close proximity and the tension and other negative feelings, not to mention ..other tension filled emotions, where grating and made them both irritable.

Hisoka was going stir crazy and it had only been two days. He knew it was for safety, hell he had a healthy does of fear himself but really. If that wasn't enough the nights were pure horror.

Every night Yoru would wake up screaming bloody murder, and unfortunately those words fit exactly what she dreamt. And every night she would close up tighter than a clam and retreat into her own little world, each passing day making it harder for the girl and her co-workers.

Hisoka knew this was bad, really bad. At times he could hear the echoes of malevolent laughter that could only belong to one person. Others he would hear sneers and taunts from people he had never heard or meet before, but along with the taunts came images. A tall dark man with black hair and cold, calculating eyes and a petite woman with an abundance of dark blue hair. The eyes where as dark and as cold as the night.

There was no mistaking these where Yoru's parents. He felt a kin hurt to hers as he caught images through out the days and nights. The disappointment, anger, and disgust they portrayed to her.

Hisoka walked slowly to Watari's lab, he needed some down time and he wasn't too comfortable with Tatsumi and Tsuzuki, well Hisoka needed a break form those caring and worried eyes. To be honest, it seemed like Tsuzuki was now the empath as he had a clear path to his emotions and thoughts, a little alarming to someone who never had to worry about that before.

He peeked in and saw Watari concentrating on his computer. Good. Walking in quietly he walked over to the window Yoru loved and stared out. He knew Watari wouldn't ask, not now and that's what he needed.

He concentrated on the still shadow on the groove. This was so much more difficult, even more than Tsubaki. At that time it had been…superficial, for lack of better word but the pain had been real, the guilt acute and now, here with Yoru…

Hisoka sighed and leaned his head against the window. It was nearly time to go home and he had a bad feeling tonight something big was going to happen something bad. Going by instinct he got up and tapped Watari on the shoulder waiting until Watari slowly resurfaced. Instantly his attention was riveted to the green pools.

"Be on guard tonight."

Watari stared directly at the youth seeing the absolute certainty and even worse underlining of fear. Slowly he nodded. "Send out any kind of signal if you detect anything." was all the golden man said.

Nodding Hisoka turned around to find Tatsumi at the door. A brief clipped nod from the taller man told Hisoka that he had been there long enough to hear and was giving him his full support.

Hisoka nodded and walked out towards his partner his hands cold and clammy. Tonight was a night for nightmares to become reality. The only question was which one?

Yoru paced back and forth across the small apartment her built in radar screaming at her. She had convinced the two that she would be perfectly fine for a few minutes alone while they went to pick up things at Tsuzuki's apartment. Reluctantly they had gone with the promise to be back momentarily.

Yoru was feeling sick, her head was pounding and she was nauseas. She wished she could attribute it to her developing cancer but she knew better. It was these…nightmares. They took a toll on her, keeping her from sleeping and she knew Muraki was behind this. Sleeping or awake that man haunted her, taunting her and she was very afraid that they where not dreams but the man was connecting to her even here in Meifu where he had no access but…her.

Her eyes widened to impossible sizes and flooded with tears. He was using her, touching her in this place where he should have no right of entry. She had brought him here. She had to leave immediately.

Yoru turned to run when a wave of unbearable pain swept through her, dropping her to her knees with a keening noise of a wounded animal.

The compulsion to stay was strong, but she needed to go. It was Muraki, always Muraki but she could fight she could win. Sinister laughter filled her head as it began to spin. She began to panic and clawed her way to the couch trying to use it as a lever to push up.

Her head did a final dizzying dip before the pain became overwhelming and her body betrayed her, the lack of sleep and nutrition forcing her body to shut down.

Minutes or hour later she bolted up her eyes scanning the dark surroundings. She could not feel Hisoka or Tsuzuki near but the dull throb was still there. Sitting up she screamed when she saw Muraki sitting behind her.

"Get away from me!"

"Now, my dear, that is no way to talk to your master."

Yoru stood pulling her blade from her boot. "I have no master but myself. Stop fucking with my head and get out."

Muraki slowly stood and shook his head, his expression that of an exasperated teacher. "How many times must I tell you? You belong to me just as your little friends and parents do."

Yoru began circling the room slowly thinking frantically of a way to warn the others and get herself out of this nightmare. "You might control my parents but they where always weak, their greed for power always their weakness." she said boldly praying her knees would hold her up.

She desperately tried to connect to her only hope, but for some reason she could not access the path that lead to Byakko. Her panic must have shown in her eyes because Muraki smiled slowly triumphantly.

"I see you have discovered you are completely at my mercy. Your guard dog can do nothing for you." Muraki glided past her to the door that in reality would have lead to Hisoka's room but in this trap that was her mind she was frightened of what was behind the door.

With good cause she was soon to discover.

"Would you like to see what happened to my puppets?"

With out waiting for and answer he casually opened the door and invisible hands pulled her dragging feet to the door. A moan of pain and denial broke free of her paralyzed throat.

The two who had been her parents, her jailor and tormenters lied in pool of their own blood sightless eyes turned towards her. Jamming a hand in her mouth she turned her head and backpedaled away from the hideous sight.

"They became too cocky wanting more than was their due. Of course I was through with them anyways. It was of little consequence."

"Now it's time for you to return to me and what is mine."

Yoru heard none of this. She had gone blank, the torment too much for her weary soul. Her spirit was breaking and there was no one there for her.

A small taunting voice was all she heard. "That's right you are alone. Who is here for you? Your friends? No they are to busy with each other, they have someone who cares, who holds them in the dark and comforts them. But you are …alone, always alone and abandoned. Worthless to anyone."

Silent tears coursed down her face from closed eyes.

That is how Hisoka and Tsuzuki found her, leaning against the couch. Abandoning their belongings they quickly went to her calling her name and shaking her slightly. Yoru showed no sing of recognition, her eyes slowly opened but she saw nothing.

"Yoru? Yoru snap out of it!" Hisoka said panicked shaking the girl. It felt like she was slipping away.

Slowly awareness returned to her eyes but they where still dull. Slowly she looked around her before focusing in on the two in front of her. She stood on shaky feet and waved away the concerned hands.

"Tsu-zuki" she whispered softly. The amethyst eyed man leaned towards the girl. Tsuzuki felt a bolt of danger run through him right before he heard a pained whisper "Run!"

Hisoka watched in detached fascination as Tsuzuki flew across the room to land on the kitchen table, breaking it with force of the impact. Turning he saw Yoru smile, but it was no longer Yoru.

Turning he tried to run to Tsuzuki but a cold strong hand stopped him. Whirling he tried to dislodge it but the grip was strong. A burning sensation that could only mean one thing began to spread through out his body. He watched in fascinated horror as the curse marks began to take life across his body. Turning fearful yet defiant eyes to the blank ones before him he tried to talk to Yoru when everything went black.

The last thing he saw was Tsuzuki's limp hand sticking out of the pile of broken wood. His last thought was of his love for Tsuzuki, his concern and a secret.

-.o.0.o-

Muraki smiled as his puppet staggered in to his office, it had taken nearly all the useless girls life force to form a path to Hisoka's ability to enter and exit Meifu and the remaining strength to bring the unconscious beauty to him.

A few feet away from him the young woman collapsed, her chest heaving and blood trickled from her mouth, her frail body trembling. Unconcerned he merely lifted her unconscious burden and kicked the trash to the side. Making his way down the hall he heard the girl struggle to her feet and stagger after him.

Again he dismissed it as he walked to the room he had prepared for his doll. Laying him on the bed he slowly stripped him of the incommodious clothes. Muraki's eyes began gleam as he uncovered the slim and perfect body that he had enjoyed a long time ago.

He was eager to reacquaint himself again but restrained himself as he had enjoyed the screams and begging that came with the beautiful package. Turning he saw the stumbling youth enter the room and slump against the wall.

He was about to order her out to deal with her when a soft moan reached his ears. Muraki was aware the instant his doll realized where he was. Hisoka inhaled a sharp breath and all his muscles clenched.

He knew where he was, he could feel the evil surround him, but he kept his eyes closed. He couldn't face the devil or Yoru's empty betraying eyes. He had known this was a possibility but he had pushed it as far as he could from his mind.

"Welcome back my doll. I told you we would be reunited soon."

Hisoka's eyes snapped open and he lurched to the side when he felt a cold cruel hand trail down his naked body. A small whimper escaped his throat as he tried to jerk away but something was holding him down. Looking down he saw cloths with marking s on them and his heart sank as he realized he had no way of breaking away.

Hisoka refused to look at Muraki, knowing he would loose all composure now that his fears where dominating him. He had been prepared to face his tormentor but the plan had been with Tsuzuki by his side to give him strength and his friends as back up.

Not tied to a bed naked at Murakis complete mercy, although Muraki did not know the meaning of mercy. His scanning eyes landed on a quivering lump. "Yoru!" he cried out softly forgetting he was tied down as he tried to get to the girls side.

He was appalled at the state she was in. Sweating, bleeding, shaking uncontrollably and looking utterly lost. A raging fire of anger built within Hisoka, shadowing the fear. He turned accusing and furious eyes to Muraki's cool assessing ones.

"What the hell have you done to her?"

Muraki carelessly lifted a blanket over Hisoka a stark reminder that he was completely under his control. "Nothing really, she is merely weak."

"You tortured her in her dreams!" Hisoka bit out.

Muraki shrugged "I merely reminded her who she belonged to. Her mind is such a frail thing and she could no longer take it. Unlike you" he said softly running a hand down Hisokas cheek. Hisoka turned his head to the side but to no avail.

Muraki trailed his hand down Hisoka's neck and to his shoulder ignoring the desperate movements of the boy. Leaning down he forced Hisoka to look at him "I will enjoy hearing you scream again. And when you think you can take no more I will bring my beautiful Tsuzuki so he can see what his perfect angel does."

Muraki felt a strong pull if lust when the green pools filled with fear and revulsion. Smiling Muraki pressed his lip against Hisoka, punishing the other ones cruelly pulling the blond locks painfully as the child tried to turn his head away. It wasn't until Muraki tasted blood that he leaned back.

Licking his lips he savored the tangy taste he remembered so well. Muraki reeled in the heady sensation as sheer terror bleed slowly into his dolls face as the crimson river made it's way down the pale chin.

Muraki raked his short nails down Hisokas smooth chest leaving red welts in his wake. He was pleased and challenged when his doll stayed perfectly still, his eyes closed and mouth clenched tight. Oh well there would be time enough later. For now he had to prepare for the upcoming events.

With one last painful rake and raping kiss he left the two trembling chess pieces in the room and walked out.

-.o.0.o-

Tsuzuki groaned and slowly sat up, his muscle protesting loudly. In a rush everything came back and he sprang to his feet. He was unaware that he was screaming out Hisoka's name or the fact that his voice broke with fear. Looking around quickly in the small apartment he was forced to accept what he already knew.

Muraki had both Hisoka and Yoru.

He flashed himself to Tatsumi's apartment a wail of denial building in his soul but restrained by sheer will that was quickly fading. "Tatsumi!"

Tatsumi walked quickly out of his bedroom Watari trailing him. Before either could speak Tsuzuki took Tatsumi by his shirt front "He has them and we are leaving now." He growled.

Tatsumi raised his hands slowly and took hold of Tsuzuki's trembling ones. His face never lost its' calm exterior even as his lover gasped and gripped the back of his shirt. "Tsuzuki, you have to tell us what happened. We can't just charge blindly into a place we don't even know."

Tsuzuki growled and the desperation grew. "What the hell more do you want? Muraki took him from me and I promised him, I promised that it would ok and he trusted me." He finished brokenly.

"I understand but we don't even know where he is. Or what condition they are in. We don't even know how Muraki got in or out." Tatsumi tried to be practical because he knew if he was not, he too would fall apart and at the moment too many where counting on him to keep his cool.

Later, when it was just Watari and himself, after this horrible nightmare was over he could let go. Watari was always there for him and he had come to realize he did not have to maintain his icy exterior and confidence around the blond. He could let go and just…be.

Tsuzuki slowly let go, forcing his fingers to unclench. "I don't care. I'm going and I will find him, I promised him and I won't break that promise."

He turned around to leave but stopped when he felt a light hand on his shoulder turning around he looked over to see Watari a worried look on his face. Tsuzuki knew it was reckless and almost useless but he couldn't bear to think his promise had already been broken because he had allowed the psychopath to take his light.

"Let me get a few things from the lab and we will go with you. It won't take long I promise." the golden man said quietly but firmly. Tsuzuki nodded briefly and they quickly shimmered out.

It was time to hunt, and they where no longer the prey.

-.o.0.o-

Hisoka slowly turned his head, the disgusting feeling of the other mans lips on his making his already upset stomach go for another roll. Looking at the slumped figure he felt tears prick the back of his eyes. She was lying broken on the floor and he had no way of reaching her. Damn Muraki for that, he hadn't even seen if she were seriously injured.

He was afraid of what could have broken such a strong person enough for Muraki to take reign. Hisoka knew the sleepless nights and nightmares plaguing her but they must have been more severe than he had guessed. And now they were at the complete mercy of the devil himself.

The knob turned and Hisoka took a minute to allow panic and fear to run trough his body and show in his face before he quickly hid it in contempt he had no trouble coming up with. As he saw the hypocritical man in white walk towards him his thought quickly took refuge in Tsuzuki, his smiles and comforting arms.

But even that was not enough to contain the sheer terror he felt when he saw the needle in Muraki's hand. But he would not give the sadistic bastard the pleasure of begging, he wasn't the lost frightened boy anymore.

No he was part of a family who would move heaven and earth to find him, and even though the fear was prominent hope was not far behind. He had, had no hope years ago, no one to count on and no reason to want to live but now, he had every reason to fight.

He had Tsuzuki to return to. He knew something would break within him, Muraki would take another little piece of him but the most important part of himself, his love and laughter was all in Tsuzuki's hands now.

Hisoka said nothing as Muraki injected him but his eyes spoke volumes. Muraki smiled and caressed his cheek before he backhanded him hard enough to draw blood.

"That was always a quality I desired in you." Muraki said conversationally as if he had not just struck him. "That fire that burns in your eyes is …captivating." Muraki leaned down close to Hisoka so his lips where pressed against Hisoka's ear and the doctor was pleased when the slighter body trembled.

Taking a deep breath he took in the young boys curiously innocent smell and fear into his lungs. Soon they would no longer be that way and he felt a shaft of desire run through him "What is more pleasing is watching that fire dim and vanish completely under my hands, those delicious screams and pleas that fall so easily from your lips." Muraki licked the trail of blood to the source and was pleased when Hisoka clamped his mouth shut his teeth clenched tightly.

Amused Muraki grasped the boys jaw and exerted painful pressure until Hisoka was forced to open his mouth a hiss of anger or pain escaping his lips before Muraki slammed his mouth over his. Muraki's lips smashed Hisokas painfully against his teeth and when the youth felt that disgusting slimy appendage slither into his mouth he clamped his teeth down hard.

Unfortunately Muraki had felt the muscles prepare for that from his grip and pulled back but not before Hisoka managed to catch the tip rendering it bloody. Hissing Muraki pulled back and backhanded Hisoka again before taking hold of his vulnerable neck and squeezing.

Hsioka began to struggle for air and he felt the sadistic and dark pleasure Muraki gained from watching him suffer, that more than anything repulsed him and a strange thought of being glad he had not eaten flashed in his mind before he lost partial consciousness.

Part of him was disappointed he had not. Hisoka was not sure what would be worse to be conscious and know wall that Muraki did to him or unconscious and forever wonder what had happened. Dimly he heard Murakis fading voice

"I see you have foolishly followed the worthless girls example and are willing to defy me. Luckily for you that amuses me. It will be delightful to see you break."

The quiet click of the lock told Hisoka Muraki had left and the malevolence was not so strong. Hisoka shuddered at the echoes of such twisted hatred and lust. Right before he allowed a fitful sleep to overtake him he smiled faintly.

Tsuzuki was a great influence in his life. He had taught him that sometimes there was a silver lining and Hisoka had just found his, weird and somewhat warped as it was.

Hisoka appreciated the genuine warmth and purity of his love for Tsuzuki and Tsuzuki for him. Holding the thought and Tsuzuki's warmth close to him he allowed himself to conserve his powers for tomorrow fights, because there was no way he would be a victim, not again.

He had too much to loose and he was not willing to relinquish it with out one hell of a fight.

**Please Review!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Sorry for the delay but overall this was the hardest chapter to write. I hope you are all comfortable because this update is mighty long. Enjoy!**

**Standard Disclaimer: Again if ****owned ****YNM I wouldn't be writing ****FANFICTION!**

**P.S: I apologize for the horrible grammar and spelling. **

_**It was dark, always dark. Why was she here? Who was she? It did not matter. Nothing mattered anymore because she was alone in the dark, with no one beside her. It was cold.**_

Tsuzuki slammed his fist against the wall he had been leaning against. Two days since Muraki had taken Hisoka and Yoru and they where no where closer than they had been that night.

Slowly he slid down the wall and breathed in the cold air. Behind his closed eyes he could see Hisoka running after him into the cold snow and taking him in his arm, wiping his tears away and Tsuzuki heard Hisoka's soft voice assuring him he was human.

A soft hand landed on his shoulder and he knew with out turning it was Watari. They needed to get some much needed rest then they would start their search again. Tsuzuki had refused sleep until his body forced itself to shut down with the help of Watari's sleeping herb.

He had been furious with the man but did not have the heart to rage at him. Not knowing Watari was out here with him despite the severe consequences.

Looking up when he heard a rumble in the sky he allowed the tears to flow down his face and mingle with the downpour. Tsuzuki wondered if Hisoka was looking at the pouring rain from where ever he was.

-.o.0.o-

Slowly Hisoka's eyes opened revealing drugged hazed orbs. He was tired having only slept fitfully and in rare snatches. His mind was slightly hazy but not enough to stop some rational thinking.

He didn't know how long he had been here but the soft pitter patter alerted him it was raining outside. Slowly a single tear ran down his cheek. He had wanted to cry so many times before but Hisoka would not give the bastard the satisfaction.

He was somewhat pleased he had been able to hold out against Muraki, and was slightly proud of the fact that he was getting under the ever patient doctors skin. His tenacious silence was beginning to wear on Muraki.

The down side to that was Muraki was becoming more vicious and slightly unpredictable. As it was his body was sore from the beatings he took, the wards dampening his shinigami healing powers. He still healed faster than humans but not enough to heal all the wounds rapidly.

Yoru…he trembled slightly. The fiery spirit was gone from her, leaving an empty shell. Hisoka could still feel a slight presence that was Yoru but it was too deep under something, he presumed it was Muraki's doing. It was like dealing with a cornered wild animal. Hisoka wasn't one for patients, that was his partner, but surprisingly the cheery man had rubbed of on him…somewhat.

Still he tried to reach out to her. The last two days when Muraki was not near Hisoka would call out to her both physically and psychically. Gradually it appeared that he was reaching at least a part of her as she would stagger a little closer to him each day before sensing Muraki and scurrying back to a corner.

Today she was only a few feet away. So far Hisoka had only been muttering random things to get her attention but now that she was there he didn't know what to say. It was odd as he could feel a spark of her old self but he could only see a… a zombie.

"Yoru, I know you can hear me. I … I don't know what to do." He silently confessed. What the hell, he didn't much to loose if he were completely honest with her. "With you like this I feel…so alone but… I remember something Tatsumi told me. He said that as long as we carry a little piece of someone with us they will never truly be gone. I am trying to keep that fighting spirit you showed us, it was…is your greatest strength and I don't want to let that go."

Hisoka was startled when he felt a body press against him. Looking down he saw a black crown against his chest. Yoru had lain down next to him like a frightened child. A whispering croak reached his ears.

"It's cold and dark. All alone. What is there to fight for?"

Hisoka pulled helplessly against his bonds. "No! You're not alone. I'm here with you but you have to come back." Hisoka knew what Yoru was going through as he himself had been there before, before Tsuzuki.

One of Yorus wings trembled and Hisoka went perfectly still. That was it! Closing his eyes Hisoka focused on himself calming down and reaching within. The scrolls began to glow but neither teen noticed. Carefully and cautiously Hisoka reached out slowly to the girl.

He was met with nothing, like a wall and Hisoka thought he was doing it wrong. He had never attempted any kind of projection. Reaching out telepathically, yes, but it was different and Yoru was not receptive of those. Or if she was Muraki was somehow blocking that.

Hisoka was about to give up when he felt what could only be described as a fluttering. Yoru shifted slightly against him. Hisoka was startled and almost fell out of his trance like state.

He hadn't been failing Yoru was blocked off! Hisoka tried to think of it as a glass wall separating him from Yoru. He never had a vivid imagination, well at least not a non-morbid one, but he needed a visual as childish as it was.

Hisoka gasped and stepped back when a small hand pressed against the glass exactly where his hand was. Blinking he realized he had brought to life his image, at least in his mind…or hers he wasn't too sure.

He crouched down to keep eye contact with Yoru. She had crumpled to the floor on the other side and he could see tear tracks marring her face. Seeing her so broken and lonely tore at his heart and all he could do for a while was put his hands against the clear glass and curl his hands slightly when Yoru hesitantly lifted hers and placed them against his.

Shaking it off Hisoka tapped on the glass to get her attention. "Yoru, we need to get out of here."

Yoru tilted her head to the side, like a curious bird and blinked once. "Yoru?" she looked thoughtful "Is that me?"

Hisoka was shocked. What was happening? He had no idea to what extent the damage actually was. It was like he was seeing the child version of Yoru in her teenage body. "Yes, that is your name, Yoru. We need to go." He repeated again not really knowing what else to do. Hisoka felt utterly helpless.

"Go where? Where are we?"

"You don't remember anything Yoru?

Yoru was silent and in a pain filled voice she answered "I remember pain and loneliness. I remember fear and rejection. I don't want to feel that anymore. I'm so tired. I am safe here"

Hisoka rose to his knees "No Yoru, you are not safe."

Yoru shook her head and scooted back "No it's cold and scary out there. I don't want to feel anymore! Why can't you leave me alone?" she cried her hands going up defensively to her head, her palms pressing against her ears as if she could somehow block what he was saying.

Hisoka lowered his head against the glass. He just didn't know what to do. He had never had to deal with people before, not people who needed him or counted on him. Tsuzuki, was different he could relate to him and it made it easier. He had learned many emotions through his life but nothing had prepared him to reach out to someone who didn't want to be reached…

Wait a minute! Yoru _was _like Tsuzuki, like himself. She had been hurt and abandoned. She didn't want o be alone anymore but…how could he get her to come back? Tsuzuki resided in his heart just like he resided on Tsuzuki's heart… and Yoru?

She had them!

"Yoru!" he banged his fist against the glass. The girl was startled enough to drop her hands and look up "Listen to me!" Hisoka demanded when she turned away. He began to panic when her image began to waver. Desperately he called out "Damn it Nekoyasha! Don't you dare run like a coward, it's beneath you!" 

"Neko-yasha?"

"Yes damnit Yoru! You know who you are! You're just running from it! You have to stop, we need you…I need you"

The girl was beginning to tremble, her sad eyes beginning to blur "It hurts" she whimpered "I don't want to remember the pain, please stop!"

Hisoka hung on like a bulldog on a bone "No Yoru, it's like you told me. It is who we are and you are a survivor, a fighter and so much more. I know it hurts and I know it's hard."

Hisoka could see Yoru was responding minutely as it was and he forged on with the will he had developed after meeting Tsuzuki and that will being re-enforced by Yoru.

"I lived in constant pain always thinking I was alone in the world and I… I lived for the soul purpose of a vendetta" he quietly confessed. Yoru had creped closer as he spoke and Hisoka could see a spark of recognition and he knew she was fighting to get back, that part of her was struggling to escape the prison that had been forged around her free spirit.

"But then I met an amethyst eyed angel who broke down my barriers and showed me what it is to live, not hide in the shadows and merely exist." A single tear escaped.

Yoru slowly pressed her forehead against the glass both teens unaware of the spider web cracks forming along the outer ridges. "I don't have that…what is there to fight for?" she asked tiredly but Hisoka heard the pleading undertone and smiled a small confident smile.

He rested his forehead against the rapidly warming glass "For you, Yoru. For your freedom and happiness. It is often hard to find I'll admit, but know this; you will always have me at your side. A friend."

Yoru lifted sparkling eyes "Friends?" There was hope in her blue eyes.

Green gleaming eyes met blue. "Yes, friends. I'm not the only one either. You have Tsuzuki, Watari, Tatsumi and your longest and dearest friend, Byakko. Those are only a few of our extended and volatile family."

Tear were falling freely from her eyes "Malak, Aatto, Ina, Hen You, . I…belong" Slowly she looked directly into green pools and recognition lighted her eyes "Sharma" she whispered and with a blinding light the glass shattered. Hisoka threw his hands up to protect himself.

Hisoka quickly gained his feet when he heard a pained yelp. Blinking his eyes he found himself in the same 'room' but now his heart stuttered briefly before it began pounding unmercifully.

Muraki had Yoru pinned against a wall by her throat and Hisoka could see Yoru's feet dangling a good inch or two off the floor. What he feared the most was the fanatical look in Muraki's eyes. It was the same one he had when they had faced him in the clearing before re awakening Yorus implanted cancer.

"You can't simply leave things as they are can you? Why try to play the hero? You had nothing in your previous life and certainly nothing in life." Muraki hissed anger and deadly insanity radiating off him in waves.

Hisoka gained his feet quickly and ran towards the struggling girl only to bounce off another invisible wall. Pounding against it helplessly he cried out "Leave her alone Muraki!"

Glittering eyes turned to him, Muraki's hand never relieving any pressure against the sluggishly struggling girl, "I will deal with you momentarily. Your rebellion has gone on long enough and I grow weary of your games."

Hisoka took an involuntary step back when he felt the weight of the gaze a freezing wind going past him leaving him immobile. At first he thought Muraki had done something to lock him still but Hisoka realized it was his own fear that held him paralyzed. Muraki was becoming unstable and that could only mean Hisoka's small reprieve was over.

Muraki never made threats; only promises.

Hisoka mustered all the strength he had and tried to concentrate it the way Yoru had been teaching him a few months ago. Muraki wasn't the only one who kept his promises. Tsuzuki would come for him and Hisoka would be ready to fight with him.

Yoru had noticed his defense was astonishingly well developed, although unconscious and she had offered to help him channel it to the offensive. Sending a silent thank you to Yoru he slammed his palms flat against the wall and was briefly elated when he managed to crack the shield and pass thru.

Muraki once again turned to him and surprise briefly flickered across his face before it was once more filled with hate and a dark desire to cause pain. He tightened his hands around the already bruising neck and smirked at Hisoka.

That was a mistake in Muraki's part as Yoru retaliated quickly and viciously. With a burst of her flagging energy she brought an arm up and slammed it down with all her might against the arms holding her causing Muraki to cry out in startled pain.

Using the momentum of the move Yoru pivoted and executed a beautiful roundhouse kick that dropped the doctor like a stone. Coughing violently she stumbled away from the momentarily stunned man and collapsed against Hisoka her breathing ragged.

"You…have to" Yoru drew in a deep breath her eyes focused on the slowly rising figure. "get out. You can't be….tr-trapped here."

"What about you?"

"This is my world." So saying her image wavered and changed. Her hair was in a tight braid and she was decked in black. Unfortunately it was the most she could do at the moment in her weakened state. It had taken much for her to fight back her fears and insecurities into closed doors but Hisoka did not need to know that.

Before either teen knew what happened Muraki was before them one arm sending Hisoka flying with an almost casual sweep. "You are an irritating nuisance; one I will no longer tolerate."

With slow deliberateness he turned his back to Hisoka, a clear sign that he thought Hisoka as helpless and concentrated on the defensive teen. Yoru was remembering everything she had forced herself to forget and it took all her remaining courage to stand and face her oppressor.

"Give it up child you will never win." Yoru shook her head and Muraki laughed crossing his arms and pretended to look thoughtful for a moment his eyes flat and cold except for that hard edge that branded him a malicious killer.

"If you give up now I will not take too long disposing of you." He offered and was insanely pleased when the stubborn wretch shook her head once again. "So be it" Muraki said as he walked forward.

This might be Yoru's mind they where in but with his blood flowing in her veins and his superior control it was easy to manifest any object he chose. He lovingly pictured his beloved scalpel as he pondered how to begin.

A curse upon a curse would be wondrous if a bit redundant and Muraki was not one for repetition, barring the occasional exception. The death of a thousand cuts was rather appealing at the moment.

It would be orgasmic to see multiple red rivers intersecting each other over her admittedly beautiful body as her screams resounded in his ears and perhaps he would have his beautiful doll as an audience. His pleas for mercy would blend in beautifully.

Yes, that was perfect.

Yoru fought valiantly to not break down and cry her stomach revolting at the fleeting images she kept on seeing as Muraki drew closer. A part of her cried out for someone to help her, she did not want to suffer anymore.

A strong presence shifted within her and she was not sure if it was herself or some other entity but without a doubt it was part of her and she embraced it. It forged a wall against the hideous and intense emotions that Muraki was deliberately broadcasting and fueled her will to live, to fight.

When Muraki lunged at her the scalpel gleaming ominously she managed to dodge on shaky legs. Undeterred Muraki simply turned with her and managed to slice Yoru arm. Refusing to cry out Yoru sprang away and glanced quickly at the wound, previous experience telling her it was shallow enough and she would not bleed to death.

Hisoka looked on and managed to gain his feet he needed to help Yoru but had no actual fighting experience that did not involve spells, katanas or a bow and even then he was only good at one of the three.

The frightened teen looked around trying to find anything that he could use as a weapon when he heard a low yet unmistakable moan of pain and definitely feminine. Spinning around once again he stared in horror as Yoru fell slowly to ground a large stain began to spread from her left side and even more ruinous was the red ring that was beginning to from around her.

It took Hisoka a minute to realize Muraki was bleeding as well but the doctor seemed unconcerned. Hisoka stared aghast as the symbols and circle began to be defined in his blood, but what's more the steady drip of Yorus blood was joining the ever growing circle.

A cry of denial escaped him before he could censor it. Muraki walked slowly behind the kneeling girl and grinned triumphantly. Yoru lifted a bloody hand in his direction, whether to placate him or warn him away he was not sure but he could only stare horrified, images of his own torture flashed quickly before his minds eyes.

A snug taunting voice forced him back to reality. "And now it's time for you to disappear without a trace."

This couldn't be happening. It wasn't suppose to be this way. A low but hauntingly beautiful voice laughed in his head. Hisoka was enveloped in warmth, different from Tsuzuki's. A distant memory of Hijiri and the Otonashi child, he had felt this between them.

Sibling love. _"Good Sharma. It is how you should remember me." _

With a start he realized it was Yoru connecting to him. His eyes focused on Yoru's pain filled eyes and a chocked sob broke out of him. He shook his head in denial _'No no no! I won't remember you because you will be with me. You can't leave.'_

He felt a tingling sensation against his cheek and he could almost see Yoru's pixie like hand resting there. _"I tried Sharma, I really did but he is stronger than I. He bound my soul to the circle and I can not break free. I don't want you to forget me or remember me in pain. I like what you said earlier, I'd like to think a little part of me will live with you; I just hope it's the good side of me"_

Hsioka's tears came unbidden but he no longer cared. She was fading before his eyes and he was powerless. Useless. _'Never that Hisoka. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. I sent coordinates to Tsuzuki and he should be arriving soon. I'm sorry that is all I was able to do."_

'_Wait! Hang on until Tsuzuki arrives. They can help! He always does" _he begged unashamedly and desperately. A fist rested where his heart was hoping it would help ease the terrible pain.

"_Not this time, little brother." _Hisoka took a stumbling step forward and gasped. He could see _thru _Yoru now and his heart gave another painful wretch. A ghost of a smile glimmered on Yorus face "_My last gift to you. Sharma means comfort and protector. You were both to me and even more importantly to Tsuzuki. Never let go him Hisoka, he is your greatest gift."_

Hisoka sank to his knees and paid no attention to the maniacal laughter. Yoru's warmth was receding and trying to hold on to her soul was like holding water in his hands…her soul!

Muraki could not have planned it better. He had hoped to break the boys spirit outside of this useless girls mind but this was second best he supposed. He began walking towards the slumped boy; they needed to get out before they were both destroyed.

But perhaps it would be easier to leave the boy here and save himself the trouble simply utilizing the body. Nodding to himself he began the journey back to his body congratulating himself on his brilliant tactics and geniuses.

Hisoka's voice got louder and he rose to his feet his hands moving gracefully and with out hesitation, his eyes closed in concentration. He did not feel Muraki entering the room outside of Yorus rapidly deteriorating mind, nor did he feel as Muraki took of the thin sheet that covered his nudity.

Shouting the last verse he extended his hands pulsating with power and his eyes filled with it.

Muraki slowly began lighting ritualistic candles. The flickering lights reflected off of Hisoka naked body and Muraki stopped to admire the boy. A bit on the thin side but it had filled out since the last time he had taken the spindly sixteen year old. A shame he had wasted his opportunity before. A silent unresponsive partner didn't appeal too much to him.

He monitored the slight rise and fall of the pale chest and was satisfied that the body would sustain itself for the ritual. He turned his back to the body, no longer in its bindings although the teenagers' hands were shackled to the head board.

Muraki set on cleaning his wound, the slight pain bringing him untold pleasure and a bigger rush as he contemplated what he would soon conquer. Immersed in his perverse fantasy he failed to notice Yoru continued to breathe, if labored, and Hisoka's eyelids fluttering.

Muraki knew he had to hasten his ritual or risk being interrupted by his beautiful Tsuzuki. He could not have that; everything had to be perfect when the goal of his long perusal came to him.

Turning he stood for the first time astounded as he stared directly into conscious and vindictive eyes. "You haven't won yet, you son of a bitch." Hisoka deliberately taunted.

Muraki's breathing grew ragged and his eyes became glazed with inhumane hatred. "Don't you dare talk about my mother! Dolls have no right to speak to their masters." he threatened as he took a step forward his eyes turning even more deranged when the expected fear did not overshadow those emerald pools.

Instead the brat smirked, openly taunting him. "Your games are beginning to get old and monotonous Muraki."

Muraki was enraged and a disbelieving shriek escaped him. The red haze before his eyes made it impossible to see Hisoka's eyes that where unusual; a blend of forest green and midnight blue. The drive to dominate and his ego eclipsed his rational mind enough to overlook the slight compulsion being transmitted.

He spun around and snarled when the doors burst open and shadows moved in invading the room like a Spartan army, enveloping the slumped woman-child in its cocoon of darkness. Tsuzuki followed close behind the shadows and gave out a cry of relief and something else as he saw Hisoka.

With a shadow shielding his body Tsuzuki ran almost at an inhuman speed to his love's side. Unable to help himself he bent down and hugged him a dry sob escaping him when he felt the familiar warmth against his body. Another sob escaped when he felt Hisoka pressing _against _him instead of away from his body.

The shadow had rusted away the chains holding Hisoka and with a glad and relief filled cry Hisoka threw his arms around the trembling man burying his face against Tsuzuki's crook and inhaling the familiar scent. Tears escaped his eyes and ran a slow path down the older mans neck.

Pulling back Tsuzuki saw love and relief blazing in the emerald pools and he swooped down for a hungry demanding kiss that Hisoka responded to.

An enraged and macabre howl made the two spring apart. Muraki had lost all composure and stood with his shoulders heaving "You are too late the girl is dead and you will all follow her!"

"Keep dreaming you psychopath." A weak yet condescending voice called out. Turning Muraki openly gaped. Yoru was leaning heavily against a grinning Watari, Tatsumi standing behind them a true shinigami.

"This is… unconceivable! You were destroyed! There is no way you could have broken thru that circle!" he shrieked.

A slow infuriating grin began to form on her ashen face "I didn't." was all she said. Knowing his need to know the answers would plague him as different scenarios played in his twisted mind. Muraki always portrayed the epitome of ice but both empaths had, had encounters with the raging madness he kept tightly leashed. It was not hard to prod his weak spot

"And you?" he pointed an accusatory finger in Hisoka's direction.

Hisoka had an identical grin on his face. Tsuzuki had helped him up and had shrugged out of his trench coat. Hisoka was nearly swallowed up in it and Tsuzuki put a comforting arm around Hisoka's shoulder but none failed to notice how Tsuzuki also managed to bring Hisoka under his shoulder protectively.

Muraki became still and each got an impression of a rattle snake about to strike. In a flurry of moves he called to his proxy shikigami to begin immediate destruction. Releasing Hisoka, Tsuzuki called to Suzaku while Tatsumi did his best to provide some sort of shield around his companions, especially Watari and Yoru as his lover was currently treating any of Yoru's wounds he could.

"Damn Honey! He really did a number on you" muttered Watari as he lifted Yoru's blood soaked shirt. A low string of curses followed and Yoru was shocked. She had never heard Watari curse like a seasoned sailor.

Looking down a wave of nausea swamped her. Her entire left side was drenched with her blood and a gaping wound of at least five inches lay diagonally across her side from were Muraki's scalpel had been embedded and mercilessly dragged out.

"This needs stitches and antibiotics." Watari said already reaching into his coat "I don't have any of that and I don't want to cauterize."

"Watari, just do something before I pass out or start crying uncontrollably."

The adrenaline helped to numb some of the pain but after actually seeing the wound her mind began to factor it in and the pain was beginning to overshadow everything. Yoru jumped and moaned in pain when a blast struck not three feet away from where they where kneeling.

"Don't worry, Tatsumi has us covered." Watari said. Yoru saw the shadow master standing close by his face a mask of utter control and confidence. There had been no hesitation or doubt in Watari's voice. Her gaze wandered to a vial Watari was holding.

"I'm sorry but it is the only way." Watari apologized as he took the lid off. Yoru nodded in understanding and braced herself for the pain. Watari and Yoru had been working on a formula that would help stem the flow of blood and help the body's natural healing agents to speed up. It was a precaution in case Muraki some how got his hands on any of them.

From previous experience they had known Muraki could seal of the shinigamis rapid healing ability and as a human soul Yoru did not have the advantage. The downside to the 'miracle' potion was not only excruciating pain, as it worked as a cauterizer of a kind, but had certain draw backs they had not been able to single out and remove.

It often left the person, in the case of the testing humanoids Watari and Yoru had created with help of Wakaba, unconscious for long periods of times and or completely incapacitated for a range that lasted from a few hours to a couple of days.

At her nod Watari poured the, miraculously, clear liquid directly into Yoru's wound and watched as steam actually rose up. Unable to contain such pain Yoru screamed out causing the battle to pause for a few precious moments. The scream torn out of her throat had been so agonized it worked to distract Muraki for the briefest of moments.

It was enough for Suzaku to by pass the standing dragon and dive at Muraki. The majestic bird managed to graze the doctor slightly before the dragon sprang into action wrapping its massive body around Suzaku and bringing them both down with a thundering earth shaking crash.

Seeing his chance Tatsumi ordered his shadows to wrap tightly around Muraki like a boa tightening slowly until a satisfying crack resounded around the thunderous sounds of two gods fighting. The building was crashing down around them but none paid attention.

Only one group would leave victorious this night.

At once Tsuzuki and Hisoka began their incantations to seal Muraki behind a magickal circle strong enough, they hoped, to contain him. They were using a mix of Tsuzuki's strongest incantations and the one Hisoka had used against Saagantanasu.

Not one to stand idly Muraki managed to break partially free of the shadow masters hold. Muraki had a lot to work with as power and energy was ricocheting from all around him, and most especially the darkness that was currently surrounding him. Gathering the power he called to the bound souls he had collected and watched with satisfied delight as his puppets came to do his bidding.

True they were practically useless but it would buy him time to gather more power as the fools turned their efforts to protect and extract the souls safely.

Tatsumi inwardly cursed. His priority was to save his captured companions and destroy the threat but now innocent souls were being manipulated. Everything was coming down fast and hard and there was no room for mistakes. Tatsumi was steadily cursing Muraki as he slowly began to peel his shadows of him like a layers of dirt.

He remained with the grim satisfaction of noticing the trials of blood left in the wake of his shadows and the very obvious broken arm and if he did not miss his guess a rib or two. Glancing quickly to his left he noticed Kurosaki-kun and Tsuzuki were in place and

sent him a confirming nod.

Somewhat reluctantly he allowed his shadows to weaken their hold on the quack, acting like Muraki was overpowering him. A slow incessant beating at the back of his skull began; he had never had a reason to hold his shadows at different positions and tasks at the same time. He could go on, no doubt about it, he was not called Shadow Master for nothing, but he had had no reason to do so in the last century or two.

He glanced quickly to his right and saw Watari holding what looked like an unconscious Yoru and zombies quickly closing in on them the three shadows he had stationed over them taking care of the oncoming threat. Watari was not really cut out for battle but when

push came to shove he knew Watari would hold his own marvelously and come out victorious.

He had a brilliant and quick mind that made up for actual brawn. At his golden haired lover's subtle nod Tatsumi quickly released Muraki and called his shadows back turning his back to Muraki, something he had never done in battle but completely confident that Tsuzuki and Kurosaki-kun would manage.

A small evil smirk slowly cracked his icy demeanor as Tatsumi made his way unhurriedly to his lovers side. He had caught a glimpse of the shimmering circle that executed power surrounding Muraki's battered form. Watari noticed the odd look, well no longer so odd, on his boyfriends face before glancing over himself. A grin broke out before he turned and sent a paper…something at a creature that had slithered close.

Tatsumi watched as tiny paper butterflies flew among the debris and burning chunks of buildings, courtesy of Suzaku. They were evidently Watari's but to what purpose these innocent paper bugs were eluded Tatsumi. His smirk turned into a proud smile as he saw a tiny butterfly touch a glowing purple orb, no doubt a soul, and enlarge to the size of his palm.

With a delicacy only Watari could bring, the butterfly flew off and disappeared, Tatsumi had no doubt back to Meifu. Taking a stance next to but slightly in front of Watari Tasumi once again summoned his shadows and proceeded to hold down the gruesome shells of human mockery until a butterfly hovered slightly over it before crushing the hideous proxy of a human releasing the soul within.

Muraki snarled like a wild animal, clearly caged. "You think you can keep me here?" he laughed insanely. "I have more power than you ever will and I will take great pleasure in destroying everything you hold dear right before your eyes." He taunted.

He sent out grisly images at Hisoka who gasped and went sheet white. Images of Tsuzuki lying broken and bleeding; Tatsumi and Watari next to him vacant eyes staring up at him from a pool of blood. The one that hurt the most and probably the most irrational were those of Tsuzuki rejoicing in the despicable and vile things Muraki was doing to Tsuzuki and his amethyst eyed angel actually enjoying it, begging for more.

A sharp command of his name snapped him back. He saw his own love and determination reflected in Tsuzuki's eyes. A slight nod to indicate he was fine he continued to concentrate in containing Murakis unstable and tainted powers within. Tsuzuki would need precious moments to summon Byakko and that meant Hisoka would have to hold down the fort himself.

Yoru moaned and stirred within warm arms. Her eyes fluttered open and the first thing she saw was a beautiful pink orb float by only to be caught by a pure white butterfly. "I thought cats landed on their feet." came a slightly amused, if strained voice from above her.

Yoru struggled to smile as Watari helped her sit up. "Yeah? Well you get the hell beaten out of you and see what tune you sing." She quipped back. Watari chuckled but it sounded more relived than merry.

"It's because you're a girl." he parried. An immense weight lifted off his chest at the some what easy banter between them. He could see more demons in both the youth's eyes but the warriors inside them had only lost a battle not the war.

After regaining her balance Yoru closed her eyes and gathered some of the power and energy bouncing around like Tsuzuki's roast. Harnessing enough she let it seep through her and into her wings were she plucked two of the longest ones.

Pouring the power into them she made them harden and sharpen to deadly edges. Yoru stepped to the left of Watari while Tatsumi flanked the scientist from the right. Yoru began to meticulously cut down her opponents hoping her weariness did not show. She spun around quickly when she heard Hisoka call out to her.

"Yoru get your lazy ass over here!"

She was shocked she could hear him so clearly admits all the chaos and the lengthy distance. A warm glow in her mind and heart made itself known and her eyes widened in realization. She stood frozen and only when Watari quickly snatched one of her daggers did she come back to reality.

Nodding in thanks she began to bully her way past the obstacles to get to Hisoka. Watari and Tatsumi were covering her back. Halfway across the room she suddenly heard Watari yell out to Tatsumi. "What is wrong with Muraki? Aside from being a perverted sadistic psychopathic killer I mean. He is so….out of control!"

With out turning Yoru ducked a clumsy lunge and dropped kicked the zombie like creature. "I managed to trace the link back to him and implanted an impulsion."

Watari hurried his stride until he was shoulder to shoulder with her. Even amidst this bedlam his scientific curiosity was piqued. "What link? You can manipulate people? When did you…" Watari yelped as he tripped over a chink of ceiling.

Yoru laughed and kept him from an undignified fall. "Long story short he transplanted blood into me and I was able to connect. Using my empathy I managed to amplify his baser desires. An enraged person is blind to all but its need and more likely to make a mistake." Yoru did not notice when Watari fell back, her focus on the sweating trembling boy.

She took her place next to Hisoka as large cracks began to form in the shield and the walls around Muraki began to expand and undulate, the crazed power within too much for the barriers despite the two shinigamis great efforts and surprising power.

"What do you need me to do?" she asked

Hisoka did not glance at her, his green eyes locked on Tsuzuki's despite the impending danger as if staying locked together would some how give them strength. It was then that Yoru realized two things. Keeping eye contact _was _helping them. _"They are synchronized but at the same time not"_ she marveled. "_They're auras are separate as are their powers but they know what is going through each others mind, their hearts and Hisoka isn't even using his natural empathy. They just...know."_

And that she discovered was what true power lied beneath the two. United they would be an even more formidable foe one Muraki or hardly anyone else would have a chance against because they had something to protect, something to live for and what's more they understood, respected and loved each other.

Second; Hisoka was not aware of what he had just done, of the consequences although given the circumstance could have been much worse. Yoru also decided now was not the time to enlighten her clam like little brother. Not when Muraki was about bust out of the shield like bottled up gas pressure after shaking the can a little too hard.

"Tsuzuki needs to call on Byakko and I need you to help hold down the shields." He panted out. Hisoka had no idea where this strength was coming from. His powers were greatly lacking after being bound for he did not know how long.

His mind, body and soul were weary but he fought because he had to. Days, he was sure had passed but Hisoka managed to lock the horrors that were clamoring to get out for the mean while. In time when they defeated this threat he would let them out and would deal with them.

'_But not alone' _he thought his green eyes still locked with Tsuzuki's amethyst ones. A slight nod form his side and Tsuzuki began to back off slightly allowing Hisoka to control more and more of the spells, something that would never had happened before they had become true partners.

'_It's not so much of needing anymore but of wanting to share. Everything has been rough for us. Some good some bad but the need to let got to be free or to fight is no longer in us. Now only the want is there and although frightening on its own, we can handle that. "_

He was snapped out his thoughts when a new power came into play. Glancing to the side he saw Yoru a few feet away her wings spread to the maximum and her eyes closed. Everything went still for a minute as her wings began to glow iridescently, even Muraki stopped. Hsioka felt a slight tugging and pleasant burning in his chest when Yoru began to sway lightly.

Before Yoru could join her forces with Hisoka Muraki took advantage and erupted out of the cocoon they had formed around him. Within a blink of an eye Muraki ran to Tsuzuki and with blinding speed threw him across the room blood sprayed from a wound. Enraged Hisoka sprang forward and despite not seeing exactly what Muraki had done he knew the blood was not the doctors.

He growled in frustration when a restraining arm wrapped around him. Breaking away he saw Yoru and froze, his angry words dying down in his throat. When he looked at Yoru he saw the girl they had first taken to Meifu. Erect and defiant but utterly cool and composed; ready to take on anything and anyone who stood in her way.

"We can't fly in to a blind rage and attack it would be careless of us and worse fatal. He's hurt but not dead, we have to buy him time. Watari and Tatsumi have their hands full and are probably well on their way of becoming exhausted. We can not mess this one up." She emphasized.

Hisoka knew he wasn't being scolded he felt it but it did not stop him from feeling slightly ashamed. Shaking it of he stood shoulder to shoulder with her, although a good two feet away as her wing took up space and the other two feet were for quick defensive or offensive positions and action.

Yoru shifted her grip on her weapons and leapt into action. Muraki turned in time to keep from being skewered but not from suffering an injury. A satisfying red line appeared on his forearm before things got blurry. Muraki and Yoru began an almost inhumanly and oddly beautiful deadly dance.

Hisoka noticed Tsuzuki had recovered and taken the chance to begin the preparations for Byakkos arrival. For a moment he felt useless but then Yoru flew back from a solid kick to her abdomen. Rushing over he scooped up one of Yorus daggers that had skittered his way from her fall and managed to stop a fatal stab wound.

Pushing back Hisoka grit his teeth and forced himself to look directly into his tormentor eyes. He shuddered lightly and felt sick when Muraki noticed how he had reacted to his perverse and brutal eyes. Hisoka fought valiantly to hold a strong shield to block the animalistic feelings that came from Muraki, the depraved hunger for violence and pain. Most of all the dark yawning abyss that spoke of madness and cool calculative forms of torture that would no doubt bring euphoria over the self claimed doctor.

Yoru felt the struggle within Hsioka and helped the only way she could. Calming down she began to send the power she was harnessing into their link feeding Hisoka her powers and helping raise and solidify his defense. It wasn't enough to completely cut off the madness but it was enough for it to be muted, enough to be easy to ignore if he concentrated on something else.

Grateful for his earlier training in martial arts Hisoka managed to black and parry but he knew he was no mach for Muraki. Resigned he dropped to avoid Muraki's weapon and rolled away feeling Yoru jump over him he stopped and looked to Tsuzuki. What he saw made his heart catch.

Tsuzuki had not been able to summon Byakko as an army of the undead had swarmed him and his hyperactive pup was fighting them off. Outnumbered by at least thirty he was doing extraordinary but every time he reached for his shikigami more would swarm around and try to take a chunk of him or harm him with anything that came in handy.

Glancing over Hisoka saw Tastumi had his shadows full out and was creating tsunamis to overcome the ridiculous amounts of corpse. It seemed like Muraki had taken command of the whole cemetery at least. Watari not a fighter at heart was doing his best to aid Tatsumi with…a giant paper teddy bear? Shaking his head Hisoka jumped to his feet and made his way to Tsuzuki. They needed Byakko and fast.

Hisoka began to cut a path to Tsuzuki blocking any thought that but to get to him. He ignored the cold hands that reeked of decay and soil. He burst through the loose ring and had to duck a flying glowing fuda. Tsuzuki opened his mouth to apologize but Hisoka shook his head and turned his back to Tsuzuki.

Tsuzuki turned so he was back to back with Hisoka and continued to destroy anything within reach. "This is ridiculous Tsuzuki! It's like pulling out those infernal weeds you have in your garden!"

Tsuzuki was shocked that he could laugh in a time like this but chuckle he did. "Do you have any other ideas?" he asked distractedly.

"Hell yes!" cried out Hisoka. His legs would not hold him up much longer but he willed his legs to hold him up, his arm to keep hacking away and his eyes to stay open. Hisoka felt the light jolt from Tsuzuki but his empathy let him know it was surprise and not pain that had caused it.

"I know you need your energy but I need to borrow some." Hisoka felt a warm solid hand wrap around his free one and a trickle of warmth and power began to flow into him. Tears began to rise in his eyes, Tsuzuki asked for no explanation simply trusted him to do what was best, trust his judgment.

Thrusting those foolish thoughts aside Hisoka began to concentrate on his power on Tsuzuki's power and he slowly began t synchronize them. It was shocking how fast and easy Tsuzuki slipped into him almost as if…he had already been there! Peace settled over the two, a connection that ran deeper than they had ever imagined and better yet comfortable with no pulling on either side just peaceful coexisting.

Drawing on that strength Hisoka concentrated despite the thoughts and feelings that were pouring into him from his partner. He took a moment to dip into them and felt, love, overwhelming relief, determination and joy. Hisoka refrained himself from dipping into Tsuzuki's thoughts knowing full well he could get lost, at the very least extremely confused.

Concentrating on his defensive magic he pictured a purple, now that their powers where combined, circle at their feet slowly expanding and rushing outward. Snapping his eyes open he released the pent up magic and watched as the power burst out of him to disintegrate everything that surrounded them. With a hoarse yell he pushed it out further striving to reach Muraki who was still locked in a deadly dance with Yoru.

Sensing Hisoka's intent Yoru jumped and flipped to the air planting both hands on Muraki's shoulders she focused her weight and dwindling power on him locking him into place for a few precious moments.

Muraki yelled out in pain when he felt their combined powers. It was not strong enough to kill him, unfortunately but it was enough to harm him. Muraki fell to the ground pain racking his body. Yoru was flying over him and with a smirk flew straight down her knee connecting painfully with Murakis' spine a satisfying crack resounded along with Murakis pained cry.

Yoru was certain she had damaged Muraki's spinal cord enough for him to move sluggishly from the pain, if she had not broken it completely. Her energy depleted completely she collapsed to the floor her back braced against a large boulder, or what used to be the ceiling and turned her head in the direction of Hisoka and Tsuzuki.

As soon as the wave of defense had disappeared Hisoka's legs had given out. Tsuzuki caught him and lowered him gently to the floor cradling him against his chest. Sitting with the boy he saw sweat trickling down the red face and tired eyes struggling to stay open. Tsuzuki could see and feel the way Hisoka's slight body trembled with exhaustion but what humbled him the most was the emotions he felt from his love.

Hisoka was completely and utterly beat and yet his spirit raged on refusing to die down into embers the way his body had. Hisoka wanted to get up despite his screaming muscles; he had to help the others. Tears burned the back of Tsuzuki's eyes and he felt humble and strength at the same time.

He ran a soothing hand down Hisoka cheek and talked to him. _**'Enough love. Your exhaustion beats at me. Let me take care of the rest.'**_

Hisoka shifted his body slightly as if top get up _**"No, I can do it. I need to help."**_

Tsuzuki chuckled in his mind _**"I know and you will help me. You asked for my strength now I ask for yours. We are one now and together we shall take him down. You remember how to do this right?"**_

Not waiting for an answer he began to summon Byakko once more. They both felt the power swell within their bodies and Hisoka began to join his voice Tsuzuki's calling out to Byakko.

As Byakko emerged Suzaku gave a cry of triumph as she brought down her opponent. She circled over the burning ashes of the remains of her enemy before gliding of to incinerate the puny carcasses that had plagued her masters companions.

'_**Together now."**_ Tsuzuki thought.

Byakko emerged in all his glory roaring his fury at what the vile creature had done. The need for vengeance burned in his eyes and for once Muraki felt fear. He saw his death in those cold eyes and a chill went down his spine. Glancing around he noticed the bitch propped against a chunk of debris. Snarling he stood and groaned in pain his muscles pinching and twisting ignoring them he lunged for the helpless girl. With a cry of triumph he tumbled them to the ground were they rolled a bit.

Having more physical strength he overpowered her and yanked her up. Byakko stopped when he saw Yoru on her knees the mad man behind her his arm wrapped around her delicate throat and his intent was clear. She would die if he stepped forward.

Muraki began to laugh insanely and Yoru moaned and flinched at the feelings that were pouring into her. Suddenly she stiffened and slumped forward. A blue glow began to form around her and Muraki cried out in pain his arm burning where he touched her. Yoru spoke but her voice was not quite her own.

"You will die by my hand. A monster so vile as you will never be redeemed and I will make you sure you burn in the lowest pits of hell where your please for mercy will not be heard. Be gone from this world!"

Byakko roared as Muraki reeled back an inhuman shriek spilling out of his throat. A smoking image of a tigers paw was braded on his exposed arm and Yoru slowly rose to her feet waiting for Byakko as he stalked towards her.

In a smooth leap she mounted him and stood erect and elegant her wings spread out from her body and glowing a dark blue her eyes deep and a well of power. Slowly the god and child began their stalk ignoring Muraki's useless attempts at stopping them. The powerful blast bouncing off an invisible shield never once touching them.

With a roar Byakko pounced and made sure he did not crush the frail human below him. Baring his teeth he leaned down and low rumbled that sounded suspiciously like a laugh washed over Muraki's cold struggling body.

Slowly he began to add pressure and heard the slow creaking of bones as the other gathered around. Muraki's whimpers and cried for help fell on deaf ears, all but one. Hisoka's quiet tired voice reached the couple.

"Enough Byakko, Yoru. We are not here to torture him; we will not become him or what he wants us to be. End it quickly."

For a moment it seemed Byakko would refuse but slowly he nodded and a blue light began to run down from Yoru into his mighty leg until it gathered on his huge paw. With no regret he pushed down and the light exploded.

When the light cleared all that remained of the scene were a few scorched walls of what used to be a building and a deep scorched hollow in the middle a lighting bolt and a black feather the only remains of the greatest battle fought against evil.

**Please, Please Review!!!!!!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Last Chapter! Forgive me if it's not too satisfying but I just ran dry.**

**I want to thank all of those who have read this and most importantly to those of you who left a review. Special thanks to MYSOU,Trans,Kiko and Chrono.**

**Disclaimer: Me YNM A dream. I also do not own I walk beside you, that would be property of Dream Theater.**

Tsuzuki stood with a muted groan and stretched his cramped muscles. Massaging the base of his neck he gathered his finished work with a satisfied smile. Hisoka had been hounding him to do the paperwork for a while now and it had taken the threat of being in the 'dog house' and a good lump the size of his fist to the back of his head to settle him down long enough to finish it.

Walking out he headed to Tatsumi's office, giddy that he had finished a good ten minutes before work ended. Now he could leave early. Hisoka, as always had finished his work first as per usual while Tsuzuki had been 'thinking' over what he was going to write on his report…with his eyes closed.

Knocking on the door he waited for the muted "Enter" before opening the door. Tatsumi was tidying up the paper work on his desk and a small smile flitted across his face before the cool controlled mask fell back in place.

"To what do I owe this visit?"

'_Some things never change" _he thought. Smiling brightly he handed Tatsumi his paper work and waited like an eager child for his praise. Tatsumi's only sign of surprise was a slight rise of his eyebrow. Thumbing through it he nodded and snapped the file close.

"I assume Kurosaki was behind this little miracle. Threaten you with sleeping in the dog house again?" he casually asked as he filed the report under 'To do' pile for tomorrow. Tatsumi managed to contain his chuckled at Tsuzuki's crest fallen face.

A small smile managed to squeeze by his defense when the over energetic man grinned sheepishly and laughed "That and good book solved everything" he poked fun of himself. "By the way have you seen him?"

Tatsumi shook his head and straightened his tie and jacket before turning the lamp off. Walking towards the door he motioned for Tsuzuki to go ahead as he closed the door. The two walked shoulder to shoulder down the hall "No but I'm sure he is with Watari. I need to go there and pry the man off the computer before he drowns in it." He said with dry humor but Tsuzuki could hear the undertone of affection.

Tsuzuki smiled brightly at the happiness his friends were radiating. Opening the door to Wataris lab Tsuzuki's first thought was '_And thank the gods some things do change."_

Watari was clicking away at his computer his fingers mere blurs his whole focus on the strange numbers and symbols running vertically on the screen. Tsuzuki's heart melted when he looked past the blond scientist.

On the widow ledge laid Hisoka sleeping peacefully, the sun bathing his serene face. Yoru laid next to him her head resting against his shoulder and her wing over their bodies like a blanket deeply asleep. Hisoka had an arm wrapped protectively around her.

It was times like these when the two teens could rest peacefully with no emotion berating them, or the slowly dwindling nightmares. Tsuzuki walked past an entranced Watari until he blocked the sun. Hisoka wrinkled his nose and shifted slightly, but that was enough for Yoru to wake up.

In quick reflex Tsuzuki managed to capture the fist and sent reassurance and warmth through the link. They had discovered that was the easiest, and most painless, way to awaken the teens. Tsuzuki held his breath as blue eyes opened to look up at him. Simultaneously they turned to see Hisoka, wondering if the jostling woke him up.

They breathed a relieved sigh when the blond youth turned on his side. Careful to bring their shields up Yoru nodded to the three men before shimmering and disappearing. Waiving gaily Watari dragged a rather willing Tatsumi out of the lab by his tie. Smiling Tsuzuki shook his head and bent down to pick up his precious bundle.

Immediately Hisoka turned his body to Tsuzuki's heat and snuggled in. Half awake Hisoka struggled to open his eyes but abandoned all efforts when he felt warm lips brush his forehead.

"Shh it's ok, I'm just going to take you home, love."

"Tsu-zuki. I can…walk" but even as Hisoka said that he curled tighter into Tsuzuki's heat.

Tsuzuki chuckled and played along "I know but let me carry you. You know I love it when you let me."

In truth Hisoka seemed to enjoy it more but the ever prickly teen would never admit it. Instead he sighed in playful frustration "Baka"

Before he surrendered to the warm darkness he felt a light kiss across his eyes "Your baka"

Tsuzuki choose to walk to the apartment rather than teleport there. It gave him a chance to hold Hisoka close to him and he was sure Hisoka would appreciate the outdoors more than a closed in room.

Hisoka was only barely getting back into a comfortable sleeping habit. Muraki's last torture had left scars in his young loves life once again and only now was he beginning to be able to overcome them. It was almost back to square one except for that precious trust.

It had been a rough two weeks since the rescue; Tsuzuki unconsciously tightened his grip on Hisoka only easing up the pressure when Hisoka muttered in protest. Glancing up he noticed they were in front of the building sighing he began the easy climb up the stairs a new worry of Hisoka's weight plaguing him. The boy had yet to recover his appetite.

Opening the door he traveled through the room with out a light familiar of his surrounding and contents. Entering the room he laid the boy down on the bed spread and went to the drawer. Returning he began to quickly strip the boy of his clothes starting with his shoes and working his way up careful to maintain waves of reassurance love and affection flowing from him.

When Hisoka was stripped down to his boxers Tsuzuki paused a moment to appreciate the beauty that lay beneath him. The scroll marks had not disappeared completely, they were just under his skin but hardly noticeable, nothing would ever change that and slowly day by day Hisoka began to accept that but was no where near ready to feel comfortable and in truth Tsuzuki didn't think he ever would be.

He had never gotten over the single most important scar on his wrist but that was another story. When Hisoka shivered he realized he had left Hisoka out in the cold he quickly stuffed the limp boy into on of his shirts and indulged himself in a smile. Hisoka was practically swallowed up in the shirt and made him look absolutely adorable.

Overcome with emotions for the slip of a boy he laid down besides him and pulled Hisoka to him, just holding on and breathing in the unique scent that was Hisoka. Tsuzuki was so proud of Hisoka, so in love with him.

After they had returned to Meifu it all seemed so surreal. "Had it really ended?" was the only thing running through their minds. Upon entering Meifu a Goshinshi brother was waiting for them a grim expression on his face as he formally informed them in wavering voice.

All, with the exception of Byakkos physical form, walked slowly to Hall of Candles, numb to everything except the relief of having Hisoka and Yoru back. As they neared the place a wave of concern and dread began to shimmer between them.

What would happen to Yoru now? What would happen to them? Had they succeeded in destroying Muraki? And if so what was the consequences?

At the top of the steps stood Chief Konoe an even grimmer look on his face, meeting each of their eyes he said nothing and turned to lead the way. Upon entering a small decomposing goblin showed the way to a study where the Count was waiting for them.

They came in together and stayed close, Hisoka and Yoru at the front shoulder to shoulder while Tsuzuki was slightly behind and to the left of Hisoka, Tatsumi next to Tsuzuki and Watari on his right. They stood close together a closed and steady unit.

The count stared or at least they assumed he was as they felt a pair of calculating eyes, which was quite frankly disturbing. Hisoka and Tatsumi felt the slight shudder that went through Tsuzuki and they felt sympathy for him.

"You have killed a human that was not supposed to die by your hands." he began and despite their given positions and various jobs a disembodied voice was slightly disconcerting "and the one under your protection has caused chaos and disturbances."

"The penalty for such treason is a high one to pay and as the overseer of this section I must report all of the on goings."

Tsuzuki spoke up his voice betraying none of his sudden fear "Count, we understand your position but it was all out of necessity."

He was cut off by a white glove. He pointed a single finger at Yoru and beckoned her forward. Hisoka caught her sleeve as she walked forward. Fear of losing her once more shown plainly on his face. She smiled slightly and sent a wave of reassurance to him.

His eyes widened as he _felt _her. Soft laughter brushed against his mind "_**Don't worry, Sharma. Although permanent it will not change your life that drastically. I will explain more if need be later."**_

"You are neither a shinigami nor a god and yet you wield tainted powers. You were allowed stay here during the trial of this case as you were invaluable. Your fate has yet to be sealed but your candle has been extinguished."

Hisoka stepped forward a burning light prompting him to step forward and defend Yoru. His rational side was screaming at him to stay quite, unnoticed but the protector that had been awakened stood firm.

"She can continue to stay here! She can become a shinigami."

Unperturbed the Count shifted his gaze to the oddly defiant boy. This was his Tsuzuki's partner. The quiet reclusive one; or at least he had heard. Fear was clear in the boy but along side it defiance and courage a heady if not healthy combination.

"And disrupt the balance? A human was killed tonight, by those sworn to protect and correct me if I am wrong but this urchin was the one who dealt the killing blow."

Tsuzuki felt a heavy gaze on him but refused to back down "As well as your shikigami. These events can not be ignored."

Tatsumi stepped forward but before he could utter a word Yoru spread her wings bringing back the Counts attention. Her face was livid the shock had taken a back seat to indignation.

"You would condemn them for doing what was right? That animal murdered, manipulated and tortured countless of innocent bystander's to gain immortality and access to the shinigami."

Yoru's wings began to shimmer with power and Hisoka felt an answering tug. Gasping he could see his faintly glowing red aura that turned purple/black. Hearing Tsuzuki gasp and a jolt of surprise that was definitely not his he looked over to see Tsuzuki glowing faintly as well.

Yoru was unaware of it as her attention was focused solely on the untroubled Count. "As for myself I do not regret my actions as they were my own. You can not blame any of them. All they did was defend them selves. If you must pass judgment on someone then it should be me. After all I am nothing more than a soul."

"No" Hisoka cried out his cry of denial second by Watari who had stepped forward. Unconsciously they aligned themselves in a line, linking together. "We all knew the risk and we took it. She stays"

The Count was silent for a while he calmly picked his tea up and drank the amber liquid trialing down to disappear beneath his cloak. An odd sight that was and it made the group feel distinctively uncomfortable though none showed it.

"Setting that aside for a moment what do you propose we do with her? Admitting she killed a man she can not become a shinigami and the Higher Council will not allow her to stay here a wandering soul."

This time Hisoka's voice was quiet but steady. He felt oddly reassured when he felt more than saw Tatsumi's shadows begin to slowly quiver like snakes in wait for the perfect moment to strike. If he did not miss his guess Watari had something up his sleeve.

"If she goes I go."

"I know it's hard to loose someone close to you, young one, but it is necessary."

Hisoka slowly shook his head. "I'm not saying it to be petulant but because it is physically and literally impossible to for me to be here with out her." He felt the ripple of unease and disbelief from his friends and love but did not turn around.

"Muraki was destroying her soul" he managed to continue with out his voice breaking at the painful memory. "I had one chance to save her and I took it. Soul Bind"

"I see."

A pregnant silence fell over the room. Suddenly the Count rose to his feet "I am afraid there is only one solution. The two of you will have to go on."

A cry of denial roared out of Tsuzuki his powers skyrocketing and Tatsumi's shadows rose as a formidable wall. Watari pushed the two teens behind his back a deadly gleam lightened his normally happy eyes.

"You will not lay a hand on them" Tsuzuki hissed his intent clear in his amethyst eyes. If anyone dared to touch either youth there would be hell to pay.

"Let us be reasonable. Where else would she go? As we have mentioned before she can not be a shikigami or a wandering soul."

Hisoka walked out from behind Watari but allowed him to retain a hold of his shoulder. Normally he would have shrugged it off fearing an overload of emotions but now there was a steady wall of comfort and determination destroying any fear or hesitation. It was a sort of high his adrenaline pumping and giving him an extra boost and numbing him to anything else.

In the back of his mind he knew when this was over, and it would end his way, he would crash. That was fine Tsuzuki was there for him, everywhere and anywhere. Hisoka had faith in Tsuzuki not as solid as he would hope but he knew in time it would become harder as it was being forged in the depths of hell where even there they could find joy in each other.

"She is not a wandering soul. She is part of me and can reside with me."

"Are you telling me she is attached to your soul?"

"Yes"

Silence descended on them and the team closed ranks Tatsumi and Tsuzuki flanking Hisoka while Watari held a slightly trembling Yoru. "Child step forward" the Count commanded.

Yoru hesitated a fraction of a second before straightening her back and walking forward her head held high and Hisoka's reassurance and Tsuzuki warmth bathing her inside. She walked until she was a few feet away from the Count. She trembled lightly when a cold unsubstantial hand touched her forehead.

Nodding to himself the count turned and walked back to his desk waving a dismissing glove in their direction. "I will report to the Higher Council of the human man with unusual powers, Muraki captured and held hostage both empaths and in their defense vanquished him. You are dismissed."

As if to demonstrate his imperative power he snapped his fingers and once again the room was filled with blinding white light and they were teleported back out. The count had always been frivolous and flashy.

Two days later they had found out Yoru would be staying in the Shikigami realm were Byakko would be in charge of her and Yoru herself would become a sort of proxy shikigami to Hisoka.

With those last warming thoughts Tsuzuki drifted off to sleep Hisoka's body imprinted on his and Tsuzuki's breathing synchronized with the sleeping boys. Things were never going to be normal again but then again what was normal?

-.o.0.o-

Two months had passed since Muraki's death and the group was still adjusting to the changes, not so much in their work but in themselves. Life altering changes in their lives after centuries, or at least in Watari's, Tatsumi's and Tsuzuki's, left a man fumbling around a bit.

Yoru was recuperating nicely in the shikigami realm, Byakko hardly ever leaving her side and of course only having to reach out to connect to Hisoka. It was odd that she could be called upon to help, she still had the wings and her cancer was being treated with medicine, although Watari was afraid it would never permanently leave, it would also not kill or endanger her in any way.

Hisoka's barriers also improved although not enough to block all emotions. Yoru helped create stronger shields for him so now only intense emotions passed through. She could do nothing but water down feelings and images slightly if a person came in direct contact with him.

Hisoka sighed and stretched his arms out feeling content in the shade of the tree in Tsuzuki's back yard. The big baka was out in the sun gardening and Hisoka had decided the hammock was calling to him.

Hisoka smiled fondly at the kneeling man. Tsuzuki was always a shadow in his mind, never, or almost never, intrusive. Being a private person by nature Hisoka often held shield in his mind but Tsuzuki, Tsuzuki was very trusting always leaving his mind open to him.

Of course there were things Hisoka never ventured near, like Tsuzuki's past. That was something very private and when Tsuzuki was ready to tell him he would listen. Until then he left the doors shut and ambled on to bask in the loving light that always shined brightly.

Noticing Tsuzuki had brought out his little radio Hisoka frowned remembering a far way day, the day he had admitted his love for Tsuzuki. To this day Hisoka could not forget the song or the memories they had been centered over.

Tsuzuki was truly one of a kind. He gave selflessly never thinking of his self preservation and because of that he continuously got hurt. And yet, he could always find something to be happy about sometimes something as ordinary as a flower or a colorful leave. Always giving and never asking for something in return.

Hisoka bit his lip he was one of those people who usually took Tsuzuki for granted. He never wanted to or intended to but he couldn't quite get over that wall of fear. He sighed and wondered what he could do for Tsuzuki.

Tsuzuki always told him he did not have to worry about it. That he made him happy by just being there and Tsuzuki never failed to mention his 'sacrifice' in Kyoto. But Hisoka did not feel it was enough. Not because he felt obligated but because he wanted to. What did Tsuzuki want? Something that would make him happy.

Hisoka smiled secretively as a glimmer entered his eyes. The same light that had entered his eyes the night of his epiphany. Humming quietly he went into the house and got a sheet of paper and pen curling up in an overstuffed chair that overlooked the garden he got down to work.

-.o.0.o.-

Tsuzuki ran to Tatsumi's office. It was Friday and Hisoka had left work early claming he had a headache and that he would meet him at Tsuzuki's house. Not bothering to knock Tsuzuki burst into the room his voce ringing out only to trail off.

"Tatsumi I'm finished may…"

Tsuzuki gaped like an idiot as Watari unwrapped himself from Tatsumi. Tsuzuki blinked once before his face split into a huge grin, Watari had been wrapped like ivy around the shadow master and by the looks of it Tatsumi had been enjoying just as much.

Tatsumi cleared his throat and straightened his tie a faint blush across his cheeks but Watari being the little devil he was only mirrored Tsuzuki's grin and slid his arm around Tatsumi's waist dipping his hand into Tatsumi's pants pocket.

The shadow masters eyes widened and he let out a strangled noise. Tsuzuki laughed and dropped his report on the chair. "I see you're...caught up. I'll be leaving now." he said not even trying to hide his laughter.

"Oh and Watari?" he called out over his shoulder "I left the cuff you asked for from Saya with 003 be sure to pick 'em up on your way out. Have a delightful weekend!" He shut the door behind him and slumped against him his ribs aching from the laughter thinking how Hisoka would have reacted.

Probably faint or knock him out until next Friday. His laughter quickly subsided as Tsuzuki thought of Hisoka. He shimmered out and into his apartment wasting no time in walking his concern clear. Ever since their last synchronization Tsuzuki could feel and sometimes hear Hisoka's thoughts or emotions if they were strong enough.

All of that had stopped two days ago. At first he had thought something was wrong, that the effects were wearing off but when he had asked Hisoka his only response was that he had a lot on his mind and wanted some time to sort it out.

At first Tsuzuki had felt hurt but he knew Hisoka was a very private person and it was part of his natural make up. Besides it wasn't as if Hisoka was rejecting him or anything. He just needed some space Tsuzuki knew they couldn't live in each other pockets.

Walking into his bedroom he was surprised to find it empty. The kitchen light had been off but the lamp beside his bed was turned on. Fear slammed into him paralyzing him for a moment and freezing his lungs. But he forced it away, Muraki was gone and if anything bad had happened he would have known no doubt.

It was then that he noticed a purple bouquet of Lilacs and Larkspur(1) on his dark green coverlet and a sheet of paper under it. He walked slowly until his knees hit the side of the bed and he slowly picked up the gift tears swimming in his eyes at the meaning behind such beautiful and delicate flowers. He inhaled their fragrance and simply buried his face in them taking a moment to calm himself before he read the letter.

**There is so much I want to say but I don't know how to. I wish I could tell you this out loud but I can't. Hopefully this will help you understand a little of what I feel inside; of how I think of you.**

**There's a story in your eyes**

**I can see the hurt behind your smile**

**For every sign I recognize another one escapes me.**

**Let me know what plagues your mind**

**Let me be the one to know you best;**

**Be the one to hold you up when you feel like you're sinking**

**Tell me once again what's beneath the pain you're feeling**

**Don't abandon me or think you can't be saved**

**I walk beside you**

**Where ever you are; what ever it takes**

**No matter how far**

**Through all that may come and all that may go**

**I walk beside you 2 x**

**Summon up your ghost for me**

**Rest your tired thoughts upon my hands**

**Step inside this scared place when all your dreams feel broken**

**Resonate inside this temple**

**Let me be the one who understands**

**Be the one to carry you when you can walk no further**

**Tell me once again what's below the surface bleeding**

**If you've lost your way I will take you in**

**I walk beside you**

**Where ever you are; what ever it takes**

**No matter how far**

**Through all that may come and all that may go**

**I walk beside you 2 x**

**Ohhhh when everything is wrong**

**Ohhhh when hopelessness surrounds you**

**Ohhhh somewhere rise again the time gets swept against**

**will carry you back home**

**So don't give up; don't give in**

It took Tsuzuki fifteen minutes to read through the letter, his tears blurring the words. Each word was etched into his heart and a loving balm settled over old and ugly wounds, scars were kissed and his entire body tingled.

He gasped and dropped to his knees when slim arms hugged him from behind. Tsuzuki turned still on his knees and buried his face into Hisoka's warm slim stomach, muffling his sobs. His tears came harder and his trembling increased as Hisoka spoke with out hesitation.

"I love you Tsuzuki, for who you are. Not in spite of what you have done, or any of these silly faults but because of them. It is who you are and I wouldn't change any of it!" he murmured quietly into Tsuzuki's hair.

They stood like that as minutes ticked away. Their bond grew warmer until it enveloped them and warmed them like the sun until they were practically radiating. Love, affection and acceptance ran strong and clear between them.

Hisoka was running one hand gently in Tsuzuki's hair while the other traced small circles on his back. He felt more than heard the repeated "I love you" from Tsuzuki and he was…truly happy.

Tsuzuki nuzzled Hisoka's stomach and delighted in the slight clenching of muscles. Inspired he snuffled lower until his nose was touching the warm skin he uncovered and he slowly lifted his head taking the shirt with him. Tsuzuki kissed the warm flat stomach he had revealed and felt Hisoka gasp.

Smiling against the warm skin he couldn't help but to take a taste of the tempting flesh and he darted his tongue out for a long slow sweep and he nearly groaned at the taste of sweet hickory.

Hisoka gasped and his hand tightened in Tsuzuki's hair, to stop him or from pure shock even he didn't know. Tsuzuki stopped but did not pull away, it was Hisoka's choice whether they continues or not.

Slowly the hand clutching his hair relaxed and Hisoka resumed running his hand through the abundant chocolate hair. Tsuzuki released a content sigh and he continued to nuzzle the soft stomach. Tsuzuki delighted in the smooth warm back and the little wriggles when he found a sensitive spot.

A devilish smirk crossed Tsuzuki's face and he dipped his tongue in the intriguing belly button, Hisoka let out a surprised yip and stumbled back, tripping over the rug. S startled squeal resounded in the room followed by a soft thud. Hisoka blinked up into amethyst eyes that sparkled with amusement, affection and what Hisoka had come to know as clean strong passionate desire. A slow blush covered his face when he realized Tsuzuki was lying over him snugly between his legs.

Tsuzuki had one arm trapped between his body and the floor his warm hand cupping the back of his head and the other hand on the floor next to his head supporting his upper body. Hisoka couldn't move his arms from where they had landed over his head from flailing.

Slowly a hand came up and cupped one of Tsuzuki's cheeks and Hisoka lifted his head slowly to lick the trail a tear had left, tasting the slightly salty liquid. Tsuzuki murmured Hisoka's name and closed his eyes. He felt soft lips upon his and he sighed softly and felt a slow stirring of passion when he felt Hisoka slip his tongue in and touch his own briefly before jerking back still shy about starting anything.

Tsuzuki wasn't ready for it to end and he followed the quickly retreating tongue. Hisoka did not protest instead he wrapped his arms around his neck and participated parrying and rubbing his own tongue with Tsuzuki's.

Gasping for breath and more than a little hot Tsuzuki pulled back and stared down, his lust filled eyes drinking in the picture Hisoka made under him. Hisoka's cheeks were red tinged form passion and his lips swollen and red were parted his breathing ragged and eyes heavy lidded and dark with his own desire.

Tsuzuki bent his head and started trailing a blazing trail of kisses down Hisoka's neck until he met with the bunched up shirt. Growling in frustration he sat up quickly and in one quick move yanked the shirt off Hisoka and tossed it into a corner uncaring of where it landed. Before Hisoka could say anything he took his mouth in another passionate kiss running his hands over the soft and heated skin.

Hisoka wretched his head to the side gasping for breath Tsuzuki merely moved on to Hisokas ear nipping and sucking the lobe into his mouth. Hisoka moaned lightly and it encouraged Tsuzuki who moved lower down his throat creating little red marks where he bit gently in stinging bite only to sooth with a stroke of his tongue.

Reaching Hisoka's chest Tsuzuki slowly kissed his way down to one of the youth's nipple running teasing circles around it while his hand played with the other one tugging on the pink bud until it became hard.

Hisoka groaned at the sweet torture of whispery touches versus solid ones. He clutched Tsuzuki's head to him silently begging for more and Tsuzuki was more than happy to comply taking in the tight nub into his mouth were he bit hard enough to sting slightly before bathing it with his tongue. He quickly treated its twin to the same torture and was pleased when Hisoka arched his back.

His desire and Tsuzuki's was riding him hard and he rode the wave, he wanted tonight to be extra special and he knew his demons were just around the corner. He planned to burn them with the raging fire that was smoldering within him.

Hisoka felt his face burn more with what he was about to ask but...he needed it. "Tsu-zuki...could you… would you take off your sh-shirt?" he stuttered out. His desire within making him stutter more than his actual embarrassment. Tsuzuki froze over him and looked into green glazed eyes and a slow smile spread across his face.

He shifted until he was straddling Hisoka's hip he quickly unbuttoned his shirt and tossed it aside holding perfectly still as Hisoka slowly drank in the sight. They had seen each other with out shirts plenty of times before but this time was different, Tsuzuki could feel it.

Tsuzuki closed his eyes and moaned when soft curious hands began to roam his chest exploring. He fell forward, catching his weight on his hands causing Hisoka to emit a startled sound and snatch his hands back. Smiling softly Tsuzuki nuzzled the side of Hisoka's neck and whispered "It's fine love, do what you please."

Hesitantly Hisoka brought his hands back up to but Tsuzuki did not move back instead he began to nip and suck at any available inch he could, one hand trailing lazily but expertly across Hisoka's chest.

Just as Hisoka was getting comfortable with the rhythm Tsuzuki thrust down lightly rubbing his erection against Hisoka's and both cried out at the sensation. A deep hot desire went through both of them, their hunger feeding off each other and Tsuzuki did not hesitate to act upon it.

He moved down to take a pert nipple into his mouth and suck on it one hand toying with the other one pinching and rolling it around. Hisoka went mindless with the combined desire twisting and moaning. With a strangled scream Hisoka bucked up when a warm hand settled over his throbbing erection. A soft mewling sound followed soon after, fire running in his blood stream as Tsuzuki slowly stroked him through his jeans.

Lost in the sensation he did not hear the soft hiss of the zipper but snapped to attention when cold air hit him. Before he could protest Tsuzuki had pulled him free of his boxer and was slowly running a finger over him. Hisoka arched up and moaned desperately clinging to the nearly unbearable fire raging within, but old fears were hard to conquer.

A cold shadow crouched in the back of his mind began to stir and memories of Muraki and his cold hands touching him began to return the pain, torture and humiliation was becoming stronger. Hisoka whimpered and tried to hold on to Tsuzuki but the sudden rush of images overwhelmed him and he cried out in protest.

Tsuzuki groaned and sat up his cock near bursting and aching rather painfully. He had thought everything as going fine Hisoka was responding to his ministrations but he had misjudged. He scooped the boy up and placed him on his lap soothing the boy.

Hisoka was ashamed, he had hoped that he would be able to go through with it even if it did hurt he would endure it, for him, for Tsuzuki. Hisoka could pretend he liked it, and it wouldn't be a complete lie after all he did enjoy what Tsuzuki did to him but now…he had ruined it.

Taking a deep breath he steeled himself and placed a trembling hand on Tsuzuki's covered erection. Tsuzuki hissed and arched up involuntarily and Hisoka could feel that had caused Tsuzuki immeasurable pleasure, a strange painful pleasure, but not in a bad way. Determinedly he continued to stroke Tsuzuki through his pants feeling the older man double over and tremble.

Tsuzuki clutched Hisoka's shoulder a little too tightly and gasped out his name, pleasure racking his body. He knew Hisoka was frightened and he did not understand why the blond was doing this. Tsuzuki knew he had to stop Hisoka but it felt so good, blessed relief after months of having to fantasy and taking care of it himself in a cold shower made him weak.

It wasn't until badly shaking hands unzipped his pants and reached inside that he mustered enough strength to capture Hisoka's hands and pull them away. "Stop! Why.." Tsuzuki took in a deep breath trying to wrestle back the impulse to just throw Hisoka down and take him.

Hisoka caught that image and winced a little but he struggled to get his hands free to continue what he had been doing. He got that much from Tsuzuki, if he continued Tsuzuki would take him. Tsuzuki tightened his hold but not hard enough to hurt "Why are you doing this?" he asked hoarsely.

Hisoka forced the words out of his dry throat "Please."

Tsuzuki shuddered at the breathy plea but he knew Hisoka was not ready and yet… he was trying so hard, tears stung his eyes. "No."

Hisoka hung his head "You don't want me." he stated flatly.

A gentle hand raised his head but Hisoka would not look Tsuzuki instead he closed his eyes. A butterfly kiss made his eyes snap open. He took a sharp breath when he saw love and desire mixed with understanding in Tsuzuki's eyes. Hisoka burrowed closer to him.

Tsuzuki bumped his scantly clad erection against Hisoka's bottom "Of course I want you but only if you want me too. This isn't just about me or my desires Hisoka, its about us."

" I do want you, I feel it every time you kiss me but…" he trailed off helplessly his small hands balling into fist within the larger ones.

"Alright then." Was all Tsuzuki said before standing up carefully. Hisoka squeaked and clutched Tsuzuki's neck. He blinked when he was laid on the bed. "Let's try this again."

He slowly began to kiss his way down Hisoka's chest and zeroed in on one of the boys nipples knowing they were sensitive. Hisoka's mouth fell open in a silent cry and he closed his eyes. A hand began to stroke his side from his hip up to the underside of his arm over and over again sensitizing the skin.

Hisoka cried out when his semi hard cock rubbed against Tsuzuki's covered one, he thrust up wanting to prolong that feeling and felt Tsuzuki chuckle. Tsuzuki rubbed himself against Hisoka and both moaned at the sensation.

The older shinigami could feel Hisoka responding fire with fire and he fully merged them together. He feed his own hunger, his wants and needs to Hisoka's own stirring their passion higher. Hisoka was wriggling under him trying to sate the fire running rampant in his body and once again cried out when a hand took a firm hold on his aching cock.

A memory tried to crowd its way past the bliss but Tsuzuki caught it pushing it aside with an image of him and Hisoka snapped his eyes open to look up at Tsuzuki. Tsuzuki smiled "Think only of me, I won't hurt you"

Hisoka lowered his eyes for a fraction of a second before meeting Tsuzuki's eyes and smiled opening his mind, heart and body to him. Tsuzuki smiled in triumph and swooped down taking Hisoka's mouth in a hungry kiss. Hisoka wrapped his arms around Tsuzuki's back and hung on slowly parting his legs until Tsuzuki was once more snug between them. Both groaned at the sensation of their erections pressed tight against each other and Hisoka couldn't help rubbing against Tsuzuki's hardness, mindless with the need Tsuzuki created.

Tsuzuki's hands began to re explore Hisoka's body and with every sweep of his hands pushing the jeans down inch by inch. Frustrated by the constant ghostly stimulations against his oversensitive skin Hisoka began to wriggle out of the jeans tugging them down but stopped abruptly as his stiff member rubbed against Tsuzuki's own unclad one.

A deep reverting moan went through Hisoka as Tsuzuki's hip involuntarily pumped down seeking more friction. Another image of a silver haired man pushing against him flashed before his minds eyes before being driven away by Tsuzuki's love and affection. Using the distraction Tsuzuki quickly removed the jeans ands boxers in one swift move.

His mouth followed his hands. Tiny kisses rained down over him and Tsuzuki paid particular attention to every trigger spot that made him gasp and writhe. Tsuzuki's tongue dipped into his intriguing belly button as his hands made the slow journey down his smooth silky thighs and back familiarizing Hisoka with his touch.

Hisoka did the only thing he could do and hoping Tsuzuki understood. He willingly let go of all barriers and let the fire consume him, trusting Tsuzuki with everything he was. And oh what a pleasure it was. Something he had once heard but never understood; sweet surrender.

Tsuzuki felt something give way within Hisoka and soon he had a wild needy lover underneath him, reverent hands running over any part of his body that was within reach. Tsuzuki slowly kissed his way lower and waited to see if Hisoka would protest, seeing none he slowly licked the tip of Hisoka's cock and had to hold down the boys hips as he arched up with a strangled moan.

Hisoka felt the slow wet heat to the soles of his feet and he wanted more, he wanted to reap in any pleasure he could before the inevitable pain he knew was to come. Later he could feel ashamed of his actions but now, now was the time to enjoy. Taking a fistful of Tsuzuki's hair he moaned again hoping Tsuzuki got his message, not sure his vocal cords were working.

Tsuzuki grinned and held Hisoka's hips down against the bed as he slowly licked his way up from the base to the very tip and back paying attention to the barely discernable vein. He almost laughed out loud with relief and pleasure as Hisoka groaned and tried to arch his hips again.

Knowing he would not last long Tsuzuki placed an arm across Hisoka's hips and slowly stretched his arm up until his hand bumped into the drawer. Keeping the boy attention occupied with slow lazy licks, like one would take on a dripping ice cream cone, he opened the cabinet and rummaged around for the small vile. Wrapping his fingers around it he brought it back and had a difficult time uncapping it.

Not because he had t do it with one hand, oh no, the small mewling noises coming from Hisoka were driving him crazy. Not only that but the sweet salty taste of Hisoka was almost enough to make him come, but somehow he found a way to stave off, wanting Hisoka's true first time to be something he would never forget.

Sending a quick prayer he finally uncapped it and just as well he was about to explode. Coating his fingers he took a deep breath and took all of Hisoka's length into his mouth. Hisoka let out a little scream and his hips arched of the bed nearly chocking Tsuzuki. Moaning around the length in his mouth he felt Hisoka's muscle tighten and moved off a little in preparation.

Hisoka saw stars explode his body releasing the pent up pressure and his seed deep into Tsuzuki's mouth strangled mews erupted from his mouth. An odd sensation, a sharp burning mixed in with the pleasure but was quickly consumed by the mixed fires. Slowly he came back to himself to discover Tsuzuki gently licking clean his semi hard arousal and…two fingers in side of him.

His green eyes widened and he stiffened. "What did you…are you doing?" he cried out hoarsely. Tsuzuki looked up from his work his eyes brimming with satisfaction and desire "don't worry this is so it won't hurt, see?" he asked gently in a guttural voice.

Fighting to get his voice back despite the pleasure Hisoka stuttered out "But...it does-doesn't hurt. Why?"

Tsuzuki stopped completely a look if puzzlement slowly covering his features. "Did you think I was going to go through with this if it would hurt you?" Seeing the answer in Hisokas eyes his own narrowed slightly "And yet you would go through this?"

Slowly the fingers inside Hisoka began to move again "I understand why you would doubt me but make no mistake Hisoka, I would never take pleasure from your pain. I'll just have to show you." As he said so his fingers touched something within Hisoka that caused him to cry out.

But not in pain, gods no the pleasure was like nothing he had experienced. Hisoka was sucked back into the world were nothing but passion and pleasure ruled. It wasn't until he heard Tsuzuki calling out insistently to him and he felt oddly bereft that he managed to focus.

He saw deep lines etched in Tsuzuki's face, strain to hold back clear. Slowly he lifted a leaden hand to his cheek watching Tsuzuki close his eyes and stutter. This man, no this angel had done so much for him and he looked to be in pain and all Hisoka wanted to do was make it all go away.

"I want you…" Tsuzuki managed to say between gritted teeth, sweating profusely in his effort to not hurt his younger partner "I want you looking at me."

Slowly Hisokas other hand rose to loosely circle his neck and his legs widened further to accommodate Tsuzuki. Hisoka felt something much larger and thicker than a finger probing his entrance and a flash of fear went through him before he forced it away and locked his gaze with Tsuzuki's, nodding once he felt Tsuzuki slowly push in.

He tried not to wince at the burning feeling of being stretched but it was not unbearable, slightly pleasing. But Tsuzuki must have noticed something because he stopped his breathing heavy and erratic his muscles trembling with the effort to not just pound into the incredibly tight and warm channel.

Hisoka frowned slightly and pushed up gasping at the burning feeling as Tsuzuki moaned at the incredible feeling of being surrounded. Neither moved, savoring the feeling as much as giving Hisoka time to adjust but the greedy need would not be denied and the smoldering fire erupted.

Tsuzuki pulled out and thrust back in both groaning loudly at the sensation of feeling each others pleasure. Soon a rhythm as old as time took over them and Hisoka felt no fear only joy, love and passion for his lover. Tsuzuki was careful to keep his strokes steady and slow but it was a tremendous effort however he did not want to frighten Hisoka their first time.

Hisoka caught the fleeting image and smiled. He slowly wrapped his legs around Tsuzuki and began to thrust up moaning encouragingly at Tsuzuki, still cautiously Tsuzuki thrust faster and slightly harder seeing Hisoka close his eyes and arching his back, the legs around him tightening he speed up even more.

Soon all that could be heard were passionate cries mixed with soft breathy please for more, harder. The sound of flesh hitting flesh and hard breathing did not last very long before the lovers cries out each others names in absolute rapture.

Dawn crept into the room to spill over the sleeping couple. Hisoka had his arm flung across Tsuzuki's chest, his head pillowed on the older mans shoulder as Tsuzuki had an arm possessively across Hisoka's waist his hand resting on the boys hip. The sheets, tangled as they were, barely covered their hips showing tantalizing peeks at their entwined legs.

The most beautiful and tender feature how ever were the blissful smile of the couple as they dreamt of a full and long loving lives together in each others arms for the rest of eternity. The silver matching rings with emerald and amethyst stones centers caught the early morning light and glittered brilliantly a silent reminder of their unwavering love.

**Please review!**

**(1) First love**


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